Sex or Love
by B Cardoso
Summary: Rory is a successful businesswoman in her mid twenties with no time, or skill, for relationships. Jess is a good looking guy who is willing to spend a night pleasing a woman as long as she pays for it. What happens when they meet? AU Lit
1. The Card

Title: Sex or Love

Author: Bru Cardoso

Summary: Rory is a successful businesswoman in her mid-twenties with no time - or skill - for relationships. Jess is a good looking guy who is willing to spend a night pleasing a woman as long as she pays for it. What happens when they meet? AU Lit

Disclaimer: Don't own Rory, Jess or Lorelai. But I do own the plot.

A/N: A crazy idea that I had last night and I just had to write it. I don't know if it's any good or if I should continue or not, so please let me know what you think. As always, reviews are highly appreciated.

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**Chap 01**

Rory is once more working overtime in the office, going over papers and trying to keep up with the craziness that is the business world. She looks at the clock in her laptop and reads the time. 9:37. Looking through the glass window that separates her from the other employees, she finally realizes that she is the only one in the dark office. Sighing, she closes her laptop and decides to call it a day.

She takes the elevator down and bids good night to the door man before calling a cab and telling him her address. She pays the driver, giving him a big tip; almost the entire price of the ride, and takes the elevator to her apartment. When she finally unlocks the door and steps inside, there is no one to greet her, no messages in her machine, and no pictures on her desk. She can't remember the last time she saw her mother or the rest of her family; or even the last time she was on vacation or took some time off for herself.

She had become a workaholic and hadn't even noticed it. Since kindergarten, she was always very determined, but she always thought it was only a good characteristic of her personality and nothing more. Then elementary school came, and she would always be found with her nose in a book. In high school, she would spend her weekends working on projects or studying because she found that "more fun" than going out; or at least, she convinced herself of that. In college it got even worse, with Harvard being a demanding university and she only accepting straight A's, she almost drove herself crazy.

Now, as a very successful businesswoman, she spends most of her days and nights working, including weekends. Her stress level is often measured by the rates of her company; there is no space for anything else in her life. Including relationships.

The closest to some kind of healthy relationship she has are her monthly dinners with her fellow businesswomen friends. They had graduated together with some of the highest grades in the university. Some had taken over big companies, while others had opened their own business. Their schedules are just as busy as Rory's, but they had promised to always find time to have dinner together once a month; to try and keep in touch with one another, keep up with each other's lives and have someone to talk to. As depressing as it might sound, they don't have time for friends or people in general - unless they were trying to make a negotiation - so if they didn't go to these dinners, they simply wouldn't have any relationship at all.

Rory was getting ready for this month's reunion when the phone rang. It really startled her, because it is so rare to anyone call her home number. She picks up the phone almost hesitantly. "Hello?"

"Rory?"

"Oh, hey Mom."

"Hey, dear. How've you been?"

"Fine. What about you?"

"Great. Luke and me are thinking about going on a second honeymoon, you know. He keeps saying we should go some place romantic and exciting like Hawaii. But I say we just go to some really nice hotel, like 30 miles away; after all it's not like we will leave the hotel room..."

"Mom, way too much information!"

"Sorry, I keep forgetting you don't have half as much sex as I do; which is kind of weird since I'm the mother and you are the daughter. You should be going wild, while my sex life should be going down. But no, I dare say it's exactly the opposite."

"Don't say it like that."

"Isn't it true?"

She pauses. "Maybe. But still, don't say it that way. It makes me feel like a nun or something."

"Yeah, yeah, whatever. Anyway, I'm calling because I know you need some notice to program even a weekend away, and since I'm planning on going on a honey moon and I wouldn't have anyone to take care of James..."

"Mom! You know I can't! There is this huge deal going on. I can't just take time off to take care of James."

"I'm not asking you to take time off. At least not too much time. I just need you to take Thursday and Friday off and not to work too much on the weekend so he won't be totally bored. I'd get him Sunday evening. Please, say yes!"

She sighs, "When?"

Lorelai giggles in triumph and smiles. "Thank you, so much! We're thinking about going away in two months, but we don't have a date yet. I'll call you as soon as I know which weekend it will be, okay?"

"Yeah, yeah, fine. Just give me at least two weeks notice so I can plan everything."

Lorelai sighs on the other side of the line, "Maybe you should stop planning everything, honey. Have you considered that? I mean, I know you like to be in control of everything, but sometimes it's good not to be in control."

"Uhm, I have to go. I was just getting ready to leave."

"Oh, really?" Lorelai's asks getting excited, "Some hot date?"

"Uhm... no, just some friends. You know, the girls from college..."

"Oh, right. You still see them once a month?"

"Yup."

"Maybe you could come to Stars Hollow one of these days?"

Rory smiles, "I'll try to show up next month."

"Okay, I'll let you go. Bye, hon."

"Bye, mom."

* * *

She arrives at the restaurant about fifteen minutes late, but there is still one of them missing.

"Hey girls. Sorry I'm late, but my mom called just when I leaving," Rory says, approaching a table with four other women in their mid-twenties.

One of them, who is smoking a cigarette and almost flirting with her cell phone on the table says, "It's okay, Ror. Layla hasn't even gotten here yet. By the way, how is Lorelai?"

Rory looks at her friend suspiciously and answers, "She's fine", before whispering to the woman on her left, "Why she is looking at her cell phone like it is Brad Pitt and being so nice about me being late?"

Judy, the woman sitting on her left, laughs quietly. "There is this huge deal going on between her company and some company in Hong Kong and someone from the other company is supposed to call her some time this night to settle the details and close the deal."

"Oh man, I hope this deal goes right or the people in her office will be working in hell until she finds a bigger deal."

"Yeah, I really feel for the people in her office."

Just then Layla enters the fancy restaurant and walks to their table. "Hey girls, how are you doing?"

They all mumbled "Fine" or something alike. After a couple bottles of wine and a lot of talking about their professional lives, which sounded more like a competition to see who was more workaholic, Layla starts asking about their personal lives.

"So, Jen," Layla starts, "How is your love life? Any better than last month?"

Jennifer sighs and sips her wine, "It's harder to find casual sex than people believe. I go out to nice bars and try to find someone to hook up with but it's very difficult to find a good looking guy who actually has a brain. And to have a relationship is out of the question," she sighs again tired, and waves a hand through the air like dismissing it. "I'm just about to give up."

"Wow, I thought you'd be the most hopeful one. What about you, Judy…have you found anyone?"

Judy laughs bitterly. "I'm with Jen on this one, with only a small difference; I have already given up."

Layla turns to another of her friends. "Clara? C'mon, at least you?"

Clara shakes her head. "Sorry, I can't find one decent man to date."

Judy interrupts, "C'mon, girls! Let's face it; men don't want women who are superior to them!"

Jen and Samantha, who is still stealing glances of her cell phone, nod their heads in agreement.

"But Clara," Layla turns back to her. "You were the most romantic one in the group. I mean, you were always the sweetheart and all..."

"Yeah, yeah, but that doesn't change the fact that I'm not getting laid. And I'm not blaming my job or myself just because men are stupid, egotistical and too fucking proud to be near a woman who earns more than them!" she says, irritably.

All other women on the table start laughing uncontrollably, but Clara's face is still red with anger.

"Okay Rory, you're my last hope here. Sam is out of question. So, what do you say?"

"Well, I'm sorry to disappoint you, but I make Clara's words, mine. Even my mom is teasing me about the lack of sex in my life, and I think I'm talking for all of us when I say we all could use more - or at least some - sex in our lives."

After a moment of hesitation they all agree, except Samantha who says, "My sex life is great, thank you very much," as she still stares at her cell phone.

"What?" Jen asks her, surprised, and then tries to cover it, "I mean, you talk about relationships like they are poison, you sent condolences to Claudia when she got married for crying out loud!"

"Who said anything about relationship? I thought we were talking about sex."

"Okay Sam, explain."

"Well, relationships are messy. Besides, I have to work crazy hours and I can't change my schedule to have sex. So I pay for it and do it when I want and with whom I want."

Clara's jaw drops and she stumbles with her own words. "Are you saying you go to a hooker?"

"Well, not exactly. After all, 'hooker' is such a harsh word. There are some guys; most of them around our age, who don't have much money. They couldn't find a good job, but they are very talented... in a way. So, you meet one of these guys and if you hit it off, you two set a price and have lots of fun for a night."

Jen rolls her eyes and turns to Clara. "Yeah, she's sleeping with male hookers."

Samantha looks accusingly at her, "Oh, now, tell me you have never done that."

Jen is silent for a minute while all other women on the table look at her, "Okay, I have. And I have to agree with Samantha, it was very convenient."

"I bet," Clara says sarcastically.

"Actually," Judy says. "It really was, from what I remember of my time with Mike. And with my current bad luck with men, you've guys got me seriously thinking about giving him a call."

"You can't be serious!" Rory says, surprised.

Layla shrugs. "Don't knock it until you've tried it."

"Even you Layla?" Rory asks, her jaw dropping.

"I was broken hearted and a friend told me about Josh and his 'job', so I called him and that's how it started. I kind of miss him," she tells them thoughtful. "Maybe I should call him, too."

"Wow!" Clara says, shocked. "My friends are beautiful, successful women in their mid-twenties who used to pay guys to have sex with them. And to make it worse, are considering going back to their old habits!" When she started her speech she thought her friends would end up feeling at least embarrassed but now that she has finished it she can see they are not ashamed at all. In fact, they seem to be eager to call their old lovers.

"Okay Rory, please tell me that at least you see the craziness in all this."

Rory looks from girl to girl, not sure about her own opinion in the subject. "I don't know... like Layla said, 'Don't knock it until you've tried it.'"

"That's it! That's my girl," Samantha says. "Lorelai would be so proud to hear you say that," she says and all girls start laughing, nodding their heads in agreement.

"Actually," Samantha says. "I think you really should try it. God knows you need some fun and this is the easiest and best way to have it. Besides, it's not half as bad as people make it sound. It's not like you are buying them as slaves. They choose if they want to accept you as a client just as you choose from whom you want to get the 'service' done."

"I don't know... I think it's not like me to do something like that. And even if I wanted to, I'd never know where to find a guy like _that._ And please, don't even _think_ about offering me to borrow one of yours."

Samantha laughs, "I didn't even think about that. But I do have a suggestion and from what I heard, he is very skilled."

"You've got to be kidding me!"

"Nope. Never used him, but I really think it would do you good to use him," she says, grabbing her purse and looking for her wallet.

"Please, don't say the word 'use' when you are referring to a person and what the hell are you doing?"

Samantha finally finds her wallet and takes a card from it. "Here, this is his card. Just call him and try it once; I bet you won't regret it," she says firmly, as if she is a hundred per cent sure about it.

Rory takes the card hesitantly and suddenly Samantha's cell phone goes off and she jumps from her sit, wearing a smirk that goes from ear to ear. "Now I have to go convince some Chinese guys to invest a few millions in my company. I'll be back soon, hopefully," she says before flipping her cell phone open and walking to the lobby. The other four women start discussing another topic among themselves but Rory ignores them. All her concentration is on the simple card on her hands that makes her feel torn. She stares at the card as if it could give her an answer to an unknown question, but it remain the same, with only a cell phone number and a four-letter name; Jess.


	2. The Phone Call

Title: Sex or Love

Author: Bru Cardoso

Summary: Rory is a successful businesswoman in her mid-twenties with no time - or skill - for relationships. Jess is a good looking guy who is willing to spend a night pleasing a woman as long as she pays for it. What happens when they meet? AU Lit

Disclaimer: Don't own Rory, Jess or Lorelai. But I do own the plot.

A/N: Thanks for the reviews guys! And **Lee, **who doesn't want Jess as a hooker? Anyways, I hope you enjoy this chap and _please_ review; tell me if you liked or if you hated it or expected something different; anything true goes.

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**Chap 02**

Rory is sitting in a Chinese restaurant, staring at the simple card that has been driving her crazy the whole week. Today, it's been a week since Samantha has given her it and Rory couldn't be more conflicted about the subject.

On one hand she thinks it is absurd to pay a guy to have sex with her; that her life is fine and the lack of romance in it is just a phase. That she should go back to her meetings, deals, international phone conferences and overtime working. After all, what's wrong in being a hard-working girl that dedicates herself full time to the company?

On the other hand, she could try it once and see how it feels, she ponders. It sounds appealing to be in a situation like that; in which you can be in total control of what's happening and when it's happening for a little price. Also, it's much simpler than a real relationship, and really, she doesn't need another headache in her life.

The whole week she's kept the card in her wallet, taking it wherever she'd go, letting it remind her of the choice she still had to make; rip the card or call him. If only it was that simple.

She doesn't want to sound desperate but that's exactly what she is; she is desperately in need of some kind of affection from a guy. She wants – no, needs – to feel wanted, to feel beautiful, to feel desired; things she hasn't felt in several months, maybe years. She was sick of going to lousy dates with old businessmen who could only talk about themselves; so somewhere along the line she simply stopped going. And now here she is, wondering what is so wrong with her. She could go to those paid dates, but then she would have to pay to be stuck with a hot idiot for a whole night. And most probably five minutes after her date had started she would be bored as hell. She isn't really sure, but she suspects there isn't much talking when you hire a guy to have sex with you. And at the moment she couldn't be gladder about it.

She sighs and stares at the card for another minute before leaving a few bills on the table and going into the streets. She dials the number on the card and presses the green button. It rings once, twice before someone answers it, "Hello?"

Mechanically she flips her phone closed. "Okay; this hooker guy thing isn't for me," she tells herself out loud and starts walking again when her phone rings. On instinct she flips it open and says, "Rory speaking," a second too late to notice her mistake.

"Hello, Rory. I'm the guy you just called," he tells her.

"Oh right, sorry about that. It was wrong number," she says, trying to sound as convincible as possible.

He laughs, "Yeah, right, I've heard that a few times," he pauses. "Well, I don't know you, otherwise I'd have your number in my phone. And you obviously don't know me since it was _wrong number_. So, why don't we come to a compromise?"

"What kind of compromise?"

"We meet; you decide if it really was wrong number and I decide if I'll save your number in my phone."

She rolls her eyes. "That's your best line?" she asks sardonically.

His voice is cool. "It wasn't a line. If you called me you wanna talk business instead of playing around."

She sighs knowing he is serious – and right – "I don't know…"

His voice is somewhere between playful and mockingly, "It's not like I'm asking you to date me, kind of the contrary. And you can always walk out."

She is silent for a moment, considering, "I can walk out at any time, right?"

"Yup."

"Okay, when?"

"Hold on," he says, while he works his schedule on his palm top and starts mumbling, "…two days from now is a Sunday; I can't. Can't Monday. Tuesday… Okay," he says, talking to her again, "Tuesday night?"

"You don't have time to meet me before that?"

"Nope."

She sighs wondering what she has gotten herself into and nods, "I'll make Tuesday work. What time?"

"I'll send you a text message Monday with details. If you have any doubts, just call me."

She furrows her eyebrows, worried about what kind of doubts she should have, "O-kay."

"Good, see you then," he says before hanging up.

"Bye," she tells her silent phone.

* * *

She reads his message for the hundredth time and stumbles over her shoes on her way to the closet. She hasn't been this nervous in a long time; probably because she hasn't been on a date in a long time. Her clothes are everywhere and she suspects they planned against her, just so she would look like a late moron on her date; or something like it.

The message he sent her was simple, telling her the address of the restaurant where they would meet, saying it was a casual but nice place; that she should wear white and be there at 7:00 so he could recognize her. Since Rory got the message she had tried on over twenty outfits – including a few she bought in the last 24 hours. The first twelve hours after he sent her the message were spent trying on white lingerie and groaning every now and then when she looked at the mirror to find what she thought to be a disaster. After what seemed forever, she looks at the clock to find out it's already 6:15 and she still hasn't chosen what's she's going to wear.

Coming to the conclusion that there is no such a thing as a totally white outfit that is casual and, at the same time makes a woman look great, she chooses a black skirt and a white shirt and puts them on quickly before grabbing her high heels and purse on her way out. In the cab she sends him a message; _'Black skirt, white shirt and possibly 10 minutes late. __Sorry.'

* * *

_

When she steps into the restaurant she suddenly feels comfortable in the cozy and casual place. It is not fancy at all, but it has attitude. She goes to a random waiter and tells him she is waiting for someone called Jess and that she isn't sure if he made a reservation or not. The waiter leads her to a table by the far wall, distant from the rest of the customers and she thinks it's probably the most discreet spot in the place. When she is sat he tells her he will send Jess to the table as soon as he arrives and offers to take her order before going to the kitchen.

"Your girl is here," the waiter, Matthew, tells Jess as soon as he steps into the kitchen.

Jess stands up from his chair where he's reading an old copy of _Catcher in the Rye _and takes another bite of his sandwich before looking at her table from the kitchen window. "Huh, she is okay," he says, not really impressed.

"Okay? I don't get why all these women actually pay you to fuck them! It should be the other way around!"

"It's because they are crazy bitches and all normal guys refuse to date or fuck or even get close to them. So they call guys like me and pay fortunes to have sex," he says, taking the last bite of his sandwich.

"So, do you accept her as your client?" Matthew asks mockingly.

Jess checks her out from the window on the kitchen door, "Nice legs, slim figure, silk hair, porcelain skin," he starts describing her but suddenly stops when she turns her head around and he is faced with her wide blues eyes. "I'll take her."

Mathew laughs and mocks again, "Oh, don't make such sacrifice. I can just go to her table at the end of the night and do it for free!"

Jess laughs and playfully pushes him with a hand. "The difference is I'm good at what I do and you suck; and not in a good way," he smirks.

Jess opens the kitchen door and walks straight to Rory's table in just a few large steps. He sits down in front of her and she jumps in her seat in surprise.

"Not what you were expecting?" he asks with a smirk, his eyes roaming the upper part of her body.

She shifts in her seat, uncomfortable. "I wasn't sure about what I was expecting, really," she tells him in almost a whisper and looks down.

From her staring at her own nails, he presumes she won't break the ice, so he tries to make small talk. "How did you get my number? Someone's suggestion, right?"

"Yeah," she says blushing. "My friend gave me your card."

"Who is your friend?" he asks, curious, trying to remember if any of his clients made a comment about telling a friend.

"Oh no," she yelps urgently, shaking her head violently and he can't help but let his smirk grow. "My friend has never… done it with you. I think she has probably done it with one of your friends; but she swears she has never used your number," she promises.

He shrugs, "Hey, I don't mind; but I'm guessing you do."

She blushes and steals a glance at him. After a minute she breaks the silence, "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have called you; this is not for me. Just tell me how much I own you and I'll let you go," she says, getting her wallet from her purse with trembling fingers.

She can't remember being this nervous in a long while. This guy was mocking her while she offered him money to sleep with her; this was crazy. Things like _'Great idea Rory!' _and _'I'm gonna kill Samantha' _popped into her head more and more often.

He furrows his eyebrows together, a smirk in place, and puts a hand over hers to stop her movements. "Is it your first time?" he asks, curious.

"What?" she almost screams and a few other customers around the restaurant look at them.

He tries to suppress his laugh but can't, his smirk growing even more, "With a guy like me," he elaborates.

"Oh," her face is scarlet.

"You know I'm not gonna bite your head off, right?" he says, trying to lighten up the mood.

She laughs nervously, "Yeah, it's my first time with 'a guy like you'," she quotes. "It was my friend's idea, actually. I'm not even sure why I called you, really."

"Well, I could answer you that, but then I would most probably scare you off."

She looks him in the eye, "Tell me."

He stares at her for a moment before deciding to answer her, "The reason your friend suggested it to you is probably the same you called me; you need a good convenient fuck, for some reason you don't get it – the reasons are endless; don't get enough with your husband, is a workaholic, have aversion of men, whatever - and you can afford to pay for it," he tells her easily.

She blushes furiously for the hundredth time that night, "And it doesn't bother you?"

He shrugs again, "As long as you pay."

"How does it work?"

He laughs and she glares. "Pretty much like sex in general works, the basic difference is that I get paid in the end," he patronizes her.

She rolls her eyes, "I mean, do I see you whenever I want or it's like therapy – once a week? And do you accept check or only cash? And-"

He interrupts her, laughing, "Hey, hey, hey. Slow down. A minute ago you were walking away and now you're trying to book me weekly. How about we go and give it a shot; if you like it I'll tell you my rules, if you don't we part ways and it's like we never met."

She eyes him suspiciously. "No one knows about it, right?"

"A hundred percent secrecy; it's not like I hand out fliers about my job."

She nods nervously and giggles at thought.

"You look like you're afraid of me or something; you shouldn't. If anything it should be the other way around," he jokes, trying to calm her nerves.

She laughs a little.

"You have money?"

She nods again.

"Okay, let's go?" He stands up and offers her a hand. She takes it and grabs her purse with the other. He can feel her body gets stiff when he touches her arm and notice how self-conscious she really is, unsure about how to act; so he makes it easier for her, putting an arm around her waist and pulling her close. She lets out a breath she hadn't noticed she was holding and rests her head on his shoulder, a small, shy smile playing on her lips.

From the spot where he stands, leaning on kitchen wall, Matthew watches his friend taking yet another girl out. He shakes his head in disbelief. "He always gets them!" he thinks out loud before turning around and going back to the dishes that must be served.


	3. The First Time

Title: Sex or Love

Author: Bru Cardoso

Summary: Rory is a successful businesswoman in her mid-twenties with no time - or skill - for relationships. Jess is a good looking guy who is willing to spend a night pleasing a woman as long as she pays for it. What happens when they meet? AU Lit

Disclaimer: Don't own Rory, Jess or Lorelai. But I do own the plot.

A/N: Thanks to everyone who reviewed! So, I have good news; **ginnyclone **accepted to be my beta (chaps 1 and 2 are also beta-ed now). So, _huge_ thanks to her! To answer **Gigi3**, no, Rory isn't a virgin, just a workaholic with no sex life. As always, reviews are highly appreciated and I'll try to update sooner if I get reviews telling me what you think about this chap – also as always, anything true goes. That doesn't sound too bad, right?

* * *

**Chap 03**

They step into the hotel and walk to the receptionist without sharing a word. She seems disturbed to be there; as if by some miracle everyone knew about their situation, so he talks, "A room for two," he asks coolly.

"Single or double beds?"

"Double," he tells the receptionist.

"In whose name should I book the room?"

He simply hands her his ID, knowing Rory wouldn't was too engaged in her thoughts to have heard the question, and she types a few information.

"For how long?"

"One night."

"I'm sorry but if it's only for one night you have to pay in advance."

He nudges Rory on the side and she finally seems to get out of her daze, blinking twice before focusing on the receptionist again, "It's fine," she says, handing her credit card.

The girl starts pushing a few buttons on the computer, "We have room for-"

"It doesn't matter," Rory suddenly interrupts her, annoyed. "Best room you have; I don't care about the price."

The girl in front of her frowns and pushes another few buttons in silence while Jess raises an eyebrow and smirks at her.

"Room 1002. Just sign here, Miss Lorelai," she asks, handing the receipt to Rory. "Do you have any luggage?"

Rory looks around, "Uhm... no."

The receptionist smirks, "Well, have a good stay in our hotel, then."

They walk side by side to the elevator and enter the small metal box in silence. The doors close and Rory looks everywhere but Jess, uncomfortable; while Jess' eyes don't leave her body, checking her out unashamedly.

"Can you stop?" she pleads.

He smirks, but focus his eyes on hers, "I thought your name was Rory."

"It's short for Lorelai."

The elevator's door open and he holds the door open to her, half bowing. He is mocking her and she knows it. Yet, she doesn't think there is much she can do; she is way too nervous to act on it.

They enter the large dark room, enlightened only by the streetlights. She reaches out to turn on the lights but he knows if she does that there will be no sex, so he takes her hand mid-way on the air and gently pulls her close. He takes her purse and throws it on a chair. She takes a step back and he takes one forward; back and forward, back and she reaches the wall. She spreads her palms open against the wall next to her waist and he rests his hands on her waist. She takes a breath in when she feels his lips on her neck, traveling up to her jaw and finally her mouth. It's a gentle kiss, trying to make her come close, and let him get even closer. She opens her mouth and the kiss is deepened, tongues dueling not for control but for pleasure. He breaks the kiss and gives chaste kisses on her lips before resting his forehead against hers, "How do you want it?"

She opens her eyes. "What do you mean?"

"Fast or slow, romantic or wild, passive or aggressive..."

She swallows nervously and he kisses her neck again. "I-I don't know. I mean-" she catches her breath when he suck on her pulse point and sighs. She starts again, "I don't know what I want."

He looks at her. "No idea about how you want it?"

She shakes her head. "Don't really know how I like it."

It surprises him a bit, but it's not like he hasn't heard it before. Many women that came to him didn't know what they liked or not, how they would want it or even what real pleasure was.

He nods his head, "Wanna find out?" he offers.

She blushes but nods slowly.

He smirks and starts kissing her again, slowly, teasingly, almost driving her crazy. He would lick her bottom lip but wouldn't deepen the kiss; would kiss her just to pull away. And when she couldn't handle it anymore, she simply grabbed his shirt around her fists and pulled him against her and kissed him hard, as if he was air and she hand under water for way too long. When he broke the kiss her cheeks were crimson, but she still manages to say, "That's not it," even if she has a smile on her face. He thinks she could enjoy it another time.

"Gotcha," were the only words he says before throwing himself against her and pressing her against the wall. His hands roam her body, his lips bruise hers and the passion is palpable. He starts pulling at her shirt and barely removes his lips from hers, just to throw her shirt on the floor. He goes from her mouth to her neck and then to her chest; kissing, licking, biting and sucking his way down to her collarbones and breast. He takes her hands in one of his and places them over her head, holding them tight and taking control. She moans and groans while he mercilessly give her hickeys, but being careful not to leave any mark where it could be seen when she goes to work and to the meetings she's sure have the next day.

He reaches around and brings down the zip of her skirt letting it fall to the floor soundlessly. Rory doesn't even seem to notice, too occupied paying attention to his attack to her mouth. Suddenly she realizes her position, being half dominated half bruised by this incredibly hot guy, pressed against a wall, her clothes almost all gone while he is still totally dressed and her hands are held over her head, keeping her in place. She shakes her head, trying to stop the kiss and get his attention, "No," she says, "not today." He smirks; he has a feeling it's really just not today, but it'll happen another time and he'll love it.

Instead, she starts to pulls at him shirt while looking him in the eye, as if asking permission and finally tugs his shirt over his head. Then she looks at his black jeans and he smiles, "Go ahead." He thinks about adding a 'You're paying for it,' but that would just kill the mood; at least for her. She reaches for his belt buckle and struggles to undo it for a minute or two and he has to suppress a laugh. Then she shyly unbuttons his pants and looks up at him, unsure. He just nods at his pants, encouraging her to continue. She undoes his zipper carefully and tugs at his jeans, bringing them down. She doesn't really look down; just steal glances, afraid that if she does, she'll start staring. That'd just be too embarrassing. But she can't help notice his profile; his six-packs, his strong arms, the lean strong structure that makes her mouth go dry with want.

He smiles at her and nods to no one, "Okay," he says before surprising her by taking her in his arms and carrying her to bed. He hovers her, kissing her face, her lips, her neck; but this time it's all too soft, too delicate. He keeps kissing his way down and reaches around to undo the clasp of her bra. He kisses the side of her breast slowly, then the flash under it and the valley between them. She moans louder and arches her back, giving into the feelings he is provoking in her. In her senses he is everywhere and nowhere; she feels his presences, his hands, his lips all around her body but it doesn't seem to be enough. The feeling of him all around her isn't enough right now and she needs more. He kisses his way down from the valley between her breasts to her stomach and navel and just above her underwear, his hands making their way down as well but on touching her sides; when he reaches her underwear he just looks up at her, a smirk in place, and tilts his head with an eyebrow raised. His hands reach her underwear as well, and he pulls at it gently, playfully. She comes out of her daze and looks at him; finally. She puts a hand over his and stops his movements before sitting down on bed. She kisses the side of his mouth and looks at him strangely; or so he thinks.

She shakes her head softly, "Not tonight." He sighs, getting tired and annoyed of trying to find out what she _does_ want tonight. "I know what I want," she tells him and he looks up, interested. "I just want this to be... normal. Just like a girl and a boy doing it because they want you. Can you just pretend I'm not paying you to sleep with me tonight and do it like you would do with any another girl, because you want to?"

He looks at her startled, not having heard that yet. When she had stopped him he thought she would go crazy and want something totally romantic, but here she is, asking him to do her as he would any girl who wasn't his client. That was not usual, but she was the client; it's not like it would be a sacrifice to him, so he nods, "Yeah, sure."

She kisses the corner of his mouth again but this time he responds and starts kissing her back, and kissing her hard until they are tangled, sitting on the bed. He pushes her back and hovers over her, still kissing her mouth, one hand on her tight, the other on her hair. He likes it, the taste of her, the feeling of being just as much in control as her. And she loves it; feeling beautiful, wanted, and by the feeling of him on her tight, needed. Her hands explore his bare chest, trying to memorize every inch of it. His hands are everywhere, they go from her hair to her breast, from her tights to her damp panties and every now and then he replaces his hands with his mouth. When he pays especial attention to her breast, sucking and biting at them she almost goes over crazy and all he can hear are her moans and feel her hot against him. She, on the other hand, doesn't even hear his groans, to high to pay attention to anything but the feeling of him. He buries his head in the crook of her neck, surrounded by her dark silk hair and places each hand on one side of her hips, tugging at her panties. "Yeah?" he asks.

She nods, kissing the spot behind her ear. He takes her panties off and replaces it with his hand. She groans loudly and bites on his earlobe. He grins and still not removing his hand, tries to take off his briefs. She has no idea how but suddenly he's got a condom and is rolling it onto himself. She gladly helps him and a second later he is inside her. She gasps and wraps a leg around him and he holds one of her wrists against the bed while kissing her hard. They move in sync, trying to get the best out of each other. He starts thrusting harder into her and she wraps both legs around him, trying her best not to be too noisy. Her body goes rigid around him and she moans his name loudly; he grins, proud of himself, before thrusting hard one last time and letting both of them go over the edge.

She lays there, limp; and for a moment he does the same. But then he is up, putting the condom on the trash and going after his briefs. He comfortably walk around naked, looking for his clothes and she tries to gather her thoughts fast enough to say what she wants. "Now it's when you leave?" she asks dumbly.

"You want me to stay? Because it's gonna cost you more."

"Right. I forgot. Money," she laughs bitterly. "How much?"

"Well, we haven't talked about prices yet, but to start I charge $250, overnight is another $150. And if you want cuddling it's more expensive," he tells her, thinking she will refuse but she answers without blinking.

"Done."

He raises his eyebrows at her fast response. She sighs, knowing he wants some kind of explanation, "I can't deal with waking up alone another day. I just," she closes her eyes and opens them again a second later, "I just... need someone tonight."

She looks at him and finds something she recognizes as pity in his eyes, so she looks away while he crawls back to bed. She is lying on her side staring at the wall, he stares at her bare back and thrown an arm around her waist, "Do you mind if I sleep in the buff?" he asks, trying to lighten up the mood.

She giggles quietly and smiles, still staring at the wall, "Nope."

He pulls her close from behind, spooning her, "Come here."

His arms around her body, pulling her close, plus the feeling of having a guy in bed with her make her giggle, louder this time. He molds her body against his, leaving almost no room between them. With his left arm tightly wrapped around her torso, he uses his right hand to play with her hair, teasing and pushing it aside.

Rory clears her throat, "Uhm... how does this work? I mean, is it like therapy that you have a weekly hour? Or you have to make a reservation, like in a restaurant?"

He laughs, "I'm not here to hear or solve your problems; and I'm definitely not food."

She turns her head to look at him, "I'm sorry, it came out wrong. I really didn't mean it like that! Just don't get offended, okay?"

"None taken. And it's pretty simple; if you liked my service and want to do it again you call me with a 48 hour notice, like I told you before, we meet and have sex, you pay me and I'm out of your life again. Pretty simple really."

She considers, "It sounds that way."

"Now, I have a couple rules, the 48 hour thing is important; my schedule is always full. There are a few things that I don't do, but you don't give me the kinky vibe, so I think you'll be fine. No video taping; I don't want my dick on the Internet, thank you very much. I only accept cash. And I don't care if we do it at your place or in a hotel, but if it's a hotel, you pay."

She listen to all his rules carefully and she is pretty sure he has it all written down, say it to all women and really takes them serious by the tone in his voice.

"If you want I can send you an e-mail with the rules, just to make sure you get them.'

"No need to e-mail me; I get them."

"Good; just one more thing. You won't know anything about my life and won't know about yours, so you can just walk out any time, but I need to ask you one thing; are you married?"

She looks at him and furrows her eyebrows, thinking he doesn't strike her as the moralist type, "No," she answers. "Why?"

"Nothing, really. But if you did, I'd tell you to be really careful and I wouldn't do it at your place, just to be safe. But since you aren't; no worries."

"Okay," she says and yawns.

He smiles, "Go to sleep, you look exhausted."

She laughs and buries her head on the pillow, leaving more exposed skin for him to tease and whispers, "Your fault." It wasn't meant for him to listen, but he does and it makes him smirk. He keeps playing with her hair for a long while before falling asleep, as well.

* * *

He wakes up to a room full of light. The windows are open and the sunshine has invaded the whole room. He looks around and can't find her anywhere. When he turns around to stand up he finds an envelope with his name written out side. Inside he finds some bills and a note. "_Jess, thanks for everything. Hope it's enough; if it's not just call me and I'll give you the rest. (Didn't know how much cuddling costs) The room is paid for another day, so stay and enjoy if you want. I'll keep in touch. Rory"_

He takes the bills and counts them. Five hundred. He puts them back on the envelope and on the nightstand. "I wasn't going to charge for the cuddling," he says out loud for the empty room before going to look for his clothes and call the kitchen asking for his breakfast.


	4. The Day After

Title: Sex or Love

Author: Bru Cardoso

Summary: Rory is a successful businesswoman in her mid-twenties with no time - or skill - for relationships. Jess is a good looking guy who is willing to spend a night pleasing a woman as long as she pays for it. What happens when they meet? AU Lit

Disclaimer: Don't own the characters; do own the plot. You know the drill.

A/N: Thanks to everyone who reviewed, it is extremely important to me! Huge thanks to **ginnyclone** for the beta. There is some smut in this chap (not as much as in the previous one, but for some reason I feel like this chap is heavier). _Please_, drop a line telling me what you think of it; anything true goes - as always.

* * *

**Chap 04**

In the last three days she couldn't help the grin on her face; it's from ear to ear and starting to scare her co-workers. They have never seen her so happy and easy-going. For the first time, they were seeing her acting like a normal person and there were a few bets going on over the reason for the sudden change.

Some of the women guess she had found the man of her dreams; some guys, that she had become an alcoholic and was always drunk - hence the good mood. There were some who thought she has miraculously gotten enough money to buy the company and some who bet she has simply gotten laid.

Man, they had no idea how right they really were.

Rory hasn't called him back yet, thinking it was too early to ask for a 'repeat' and that she would sound desperate. But his card is always with her and his number is on her cell phone; just in case she changes her mind. She knew he wouldn't call; his job was to attend who called, not to call in the morning after.

She is sitting on her desk, staring at the blank computer screen, frequently stealing glances at her phone. "Okay, you're being stupid. Just call him!" she tells herself out loud. She raises the phone to her ear than looks up and puts to its back to its holder. She goes to the glass wall on her office and let the curtains down to get some privacy before going back to her chair and dialing his number.

"Hey."

"Hi." she says shyly.

"I was wondering when you were going to call," he tells her.

She smiles like a teenager, "You were so sure I would call?"

"There has never been anyone who didn't call back. Besides, you said you would 'keep in touch' on the card."

She closes her eyes, glad he can't see her blush through the phone, "Right. The card. About that, was it enough or do I own you-"

"It was fine, don't worry about it. But that wasn't the reason you called, right?"

"No, actually I was wondering if you could fit me in your schedule."

For some reason she could bet he was smirking when he answered, "Sure, hold on."

A second later he was going through his schedule, trying to find some time for her. "Nights, right?"

"Uhm, yeah. You work days too?" she asks confused.

"Some women are workaholics, have crazy shifts, or even worse, husbands. So, sometimes I have to work during lunch time."

She wants to laugh but just musters a 'huh'.

"Okay, next week I'm free on Monday and Wednesday."

She sighs disappointed, "I can't make it on Monday, so it'll have to be Wednesday."

"Okay," he says, while writing her name on the date.

"Are you really too busy on the weekend?" she tries.

"Today is Friday, 48-hour rule, remember?"

"Right, right."

"Well, you can decide where you want it and what time and send me a message one day earlier, okay?"

"Yeah, sure."

"Alright then, see you on Wednesday."

"Bye."

* * *

This time Rory was calmer while getting ready to meet Jess, even though she was running late due to her work. She's still insecure about her appearance, unsure about what to wear, and embarrassed about the situation, but she is also excited about seeing him and doesn't feel as weird as she thought she would. She sent him a message the day before telling him she had reserved the same room in the hotel and that they would meet around 8-ish. 

She gets there twenty minutes late and out of breath.

"I'm so sorry, but there was this meeting..." she trails off, noticing for the first time that he is only on his briefs, laying in bed, waiting for her.

"It's okay," he says, standing up and walking to her. He wraps his arms around her waist and kisses her on the lips, "How do you want it?"

She tilts her head to the side to have a better look at him, "You choose."

He chuckles, "You are the one paying!"

Her face falls. "Don't say that, okay?"

He nods and shrugs, not really seeing why she would feel offended.

She sighs. "You choose," she says again.

He un-zips her skirt and lets it fall to the ground, bringing his lips down to her neck, "Okay." He keeps kissing his way down from her neck to her shoulder and the side of her breast. She feels like a doll, being played or just a naive girl, making love for the first time. Except it's not her first time and this is no making love; this is pure sex and she is well aware of that.

He walks slowly, making her walk backwards until the back of her knees hit the edge of the bed. He gently lays her down, lying with her. He takes thing slow, taking off each item of clothing on his own pace, to enjoy it as much as he can. When she is finally naked on bed she looks up to realize he is still fully clothed. She tries to move and cover herself, but he just moves forward and takes her hands into his. She feels his eyes on her, traveling up and down, burning her skin and leaving her breathless.

"Why?" he asks.

"'Why' what?" she asks, confused.

"Why are you so ashamed of this? Of being seen like this?"

"C'mon Jess."

"Just tell me," he asks.

She shakes her head, tired, "I don't know."

He nods, staring at her, "I think you are uncomfortable just because you're not used to it anymore," he says, hovering her.

"What do you mean?" she asks, sinking into the mattress.

"That you-" he says between kisses, "are not used to be seen in all your naked glory. Or even just naked," he jokes.

She stiffens and stares at him while he kisses her collarbone. She pushes him off of her, but it doesn't cause much effect, "You're saying you think I don't have much sex?" she asks, pissed off.

He shakes his head and pushes himself and her onto the mattress, kissing the side of her breast and his way up to her neck, burying his face into her neck, holding her hands by her sides, trying to contain her momentary rage. "I don't _think, _I _know _I'm your first fuck in a very good long while; and will probably remain the only to fuck you at least for now."

She freezes and glares at him and he lets go of her hands. The rage is still burning inside her, and if she can't win with the truth, she will win lying. "You know nothing," she says just before kissing him passionately, scratching his back with her nails.

He groans and laughs at her response, an almost evil mock smirk on his face. "Oh, I know, I do know," he attacks her neck. "That's the reason you call me and we have these meetings. That's why you're so shy about all this and you hate so much when I talk about money. That's why you blush, you don't choose how you want it and you are so fucking tight," he whispers into her ear, slowly trusting into her.

"Why are you doing this?"

"You're paying me to, remember?"

She bites her tongue, regretting her earlier question. "Just end it soon? Please?" She pleads, letting a few tears drop.

"End what?"

"This. The loneliness."

He nods shortly and starts to thrust faster and harder, making her moans increasing in volume and she almost screams; not sure if it's from pleasure or pain.

When he rolls to the side of the bed she just takes a deep breath and stands up, gathering her clothes as fast as she can.

"Hey, hey, what are you doing?"

"I shouldn't- I shouldn't-" she starts crying again. "It was a mistake. I don't know what I was thinking. Why? _Why?_" she cries between sobs.

He stands up and hugs her, "Hey, I wasn't trying to make you feel bad." He leads her back to the bed and she lets him because she is just too broken to protest. He sits against the headboard, hugging her. "I was just being honest, but I didn't want you to feel like this. I'm not judging you."

She looks up at him, not really believing. But his eyes remain the same, and he just re-affirms his statement, "I'm not." He pauses and embraces her, "Don't read too much into it. I was just telling you the truth, but it's only the truth because you make it that way," he tells her softly.

"Stop it. Just- stop it, okay? Please!" she asks almost hysterical.

He nods, "Okay, okay." She keeps crying and sobbing while he rocks her, until she calms down and starts crying quietly. "Shh... c'mon, you need to sleep." He lays her down on the hotel bed still holding her and watches her cry herself to sleep for the person she has become.

* * *

He runs his fingers through her hair and watches her sleeping quietly. It's not he feels pity for her, but he feels for her. The way she got hysterical... he hadn't expected that. He thought she knew how screwed up her life was; that she had chosen it; fuck, that it was what she wanted. But when she started crying uncontrollably and tried to fly out of the room as fast as possible, he had to think it over. He stares at her but can't really understand why she is in a situation like that. Okay, he knows, and he has seen this story played over and over again in many different ways, but he can't understand how _she _ended up in a story like this. 

He touches her cheeks and she stirs in her sleep and opens her eyes. At first she looks confused, but then she seems to remember what had happened and even in the darkness of the room it is possible to see the fading blush on her cheeks.

"You don't have to stay."

He shakes his head, "I don't mind."

She looks down, "Before... I don't know what happened."

"Forget about it. I don't think you'll want to ever understand it."

She nods and a couple of tears run down her eyes, "I know. I understand. I just... hate it."

He runs a hand down her cheek, "It's okay. I'm not going to bring it up again, if that's what you are worried about."

She looks up at him, as to see if he is telling the truth and he adds, "And as I told you, I was not judging you; just stating facts. But if you don't want to deal with them, fine," he shrugs.

She stares at him, still upset, then looks down. "I didn't plan to be like this. I never wanted to become a workaholic with no personal life," she tells him in a whisper.

He kisses her shoulder quietly, not responding. She sighs, standing up, "I have to go home, get ready for work..."

He nods, in a way pitying her. "Okay," he says, also standing up.

"Oh, no, you don't have to leave. Stay, sleep, have breakfast, whatever. You've already worked a lot; now it's my turn."

He is not sure if she is saying that for real or if she is mocking him, but in case of doubt, he lays back down letting sleep finally start to allure him.

"I'll leave your money on the night stand. I'll call you later okay?"

"Sure," he says, watching her putting her clothes back on while walking around the room. When she is ready, she puts a few bills in an envelope and places it on the nightstand, getting her purse and heading to the door. "Have a nice day at work," she hears him say faintly from the bed, already half asleep.

She closes the door and he glances at the envelope at the nightstand, torn between staying in bed or standing up and checking the content of it. He stares at it for another moment before turning around and falling back asleep. He knows that she has overpaid him anyway.


	5. The Lunch Date

Title: Sex or Love

Author: Bru Cardoso

Summary: Rory is a successful businesswoman in her mid-twenties with no time - or skill - for relationships. Jess is a good looking guy who is willing to spend a night pleasing a woman as long as she pays for it. What happens when they meet? AU Lit

Disclaimer: Don't own the characters; do own the plot. You know the drill.

A/N: _Huge_ thanks to **ginnyclone** for the beta and also to everyone who reviewed. I didn't like this chap but it was necessary, so I'm sorry if it sucks too bad. Next chap shouldn't take too long and I promise it'll be better. And _please_, drop a line telling me what you think of it; anything true goes - as always.

VVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVV

She tapped her pen against the open file, still looking straight ahead, though her thoughts couldn't be more distant. The meeting with associates from all over the country was carried on and she looked just as interested as she had always been. 

But she wasn't. This time was different. She always paid attention to what was happening on these meetings, wrote endless notes, actively participated expressing her opinions and left the room ready to make a revolution when she got to her own office. 

But this time was different. This time she kept tapping her pen on the open file, nervously rubbing her foot against the back of her other leg under the table and biting her bottom lip. This time there were no notes of any kind on the open file or interruptions from her part; just some abstract drawings that were done when she wasn't checking her watch. 

When the meeting was finally over, she was startled back to reality, surprised that she had no idea about what was discussed or decided. She sighed deeply. She wasn't really bothered about the meeting; she could get all that was discussed by the end of the day. But she was frustrated with herself. The only thing she could thing about lately was Jess. 

He haunted her thoughts and dreams, leaving her on her toes night and day. And after their last rendezvous she was even more drawn to him, even if she thought she shouldn't be. He had bluntly told her all she didn't want to hear and he did so while having sex with her – sex that she was going to pay for. There was something very twisted on that. But still, she couldn't stop thinking about him. 

She stood up form the now empty meeting room and went to her office two floors down. She hit his number on her speed dial and waited for him to answer. 

"Morning, Lorelai. How was last night for you?" 

"Ew!" she said with a totally disgusted voice. "And good morning to you too, by the way." 

He chuckled, "What's so horrible?" 

"You calling me Lorelai. Don't do that anymore." 

"But… it's your name," he tried, baffled. 

"It's my mother's name," she corrected. 

"So what is your name?" 

"Well, it's Lorelai." 

He sounded frustrated, "Are you stoned?" 

"My name is Lorelai but everyone calls me Rory. My mother's name is also Lorelai. She named me after herself." 

"O-kay, and so what was with greeting?" 

"First thing; you asked was how last night was for Lorelai." 

He laughed and she groaned. "Okay, _Rory._ How was last night for you?" 

She blushed, grateful they were talking on the phone and not face to face. "You know how it was." 

"Well, I can imagine but I can never be sure. This is like quality control. I can't hire a company to measure the quality in this kind of business, you see," he explained with a smirk. 

She rolled her eyes and bit her lip like a teenager, "You just want to hear about how good you are." 

"Well, I guess that's my answer. So, I'll be seeing you soon," he half asks, half affirmed. 

"Yeah, about that. I was calling to ask if I couldn't see you today, maybe tomorrow…" she tried hopeful. 

He ran a hand through his hair, "I'm sorry but I'm busy tonight." 

"How about lunch?" 

"What?" 

"No sex. Just lunch." He was quiet and she thought she was losing her battle, so she added, "I'll pay you." 

He sighed, annoyed, "And what's in it for you?" 

Her face fell a little and she was glad he couldn't see it through the phone. She swallowed before answering, "Just the company." 

He was silent for a moment. "How do you like pizza?" 

"It's the base on the pyramid food of my diet." 

He laughed, "Okay. The place we first met in two hours." 

"Perfect. Thank you, Jess." 

"See you then." 

VVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVV 

She was sitting by the window, waiting, when he arrived and sat in front of her. He smiled. "Hey, have you ordered anything?" 

"No, I was waiting for you." 

"Okay, so you have any preferences on pizza toppings?" 

"Not really. I can eat almost anything, except for fruits and vegetables." 

He looked at her oddly and chuckled, "Okay, I think I can manage." 

He looked at the bar where a bored Matthew was people watching and nodded to him, signing they were ready to order. 

"Excuse me, are you ready to order?" Matthew asked, trying to sound as professional as possible. 

Jess smirked, "Hey, Matt." 

Matt raised an eyebrow and nodded once, "Jess." 

"We want a pizza. Today's special; no vegetables." 

"Drinks?" he asked, scribing the order on his pad. 

Jess looked pointedly to Rory. "Soda, I have to work afterwards." 

Jess nodded, "Me too. I also have some work to do." 

Matt chuckled, "O-kay. I'll bring the drinks. The pizza will take about 20 min." 

"It's fine." 

"Okay then, I'll leave you two alone," he said and turned around, heading to the kitchen to place their order. 

Rory stared at Jess, "You know each other?" 

"Yup. We're friends." 

"And he's the same waiter from the night met," she says putting two and two together." 

"Yeah, well, I like the place and the food. I've never had a client who knew of this place – it's not exactly their kind of restaurant – so it keeps the business low profile. And by bringing them here, I help Matt get good tips and he helps me choose them." 

"Choose them?" 

He laughed, "You'd be surprised with the number of freaks that call me." 

She blushed, looked down and then away, "Yeah, I bet." 

He smirked, "I don't consider you a freak. Complicated, yes; but not quite a freak." 

She smiled a little. Just then Matt came with their drinks setting them down on the table. 

"Sorry to break the moment, but the woman at the bar sent you this," Matt said, pushing something on the table in Jess' direction. 

Jess looked at a folded hundred-dollar bill and opened it to read in bright red ink, 'PLEASE TALK TO ME'. 

He looked up to the bar to find a tall blond woman in a short skimpy red dress, sitting on a stool drinking something he knew to be gin - her favorite drink. 

Rory also read the note and looked at the imposing woman at the bar. She swallowed hard, amazed. That woman could have stepped right out of a Victoria's Secrets catalog. She had all the right curves and knew it. She was wearing a dress that seems to be made exactly to fit her body, not leaving even breathing room. She had a perfect straight hair, with nails perfectly done and was wearing just enough make up to make her look perfect; like an angel and a devil in the same package. 

Rory half expected Jess to look at her, say he had to go and leave her standing there like a fool. So she watched him anxiously, waiting for his reaction. 

Jess sighed and looked from the woman at the bar to Matt, who seemed to know the history behind it all. "Give her money back and tell her I've already said everything there was to be said." 

Matt nodded once, in understanding, and took back the bill before walking to the bar. Rory on the other hand furrows her brows in confusion and looked at him questioningly, "Client?" 

He glanced at her, "No." 

She looked back at the blonde and then at him. "You can't tell me you refused _her_ and expect me to believe." 

He looked her and shrugged "No, I didn't refuse her as a client." 

"So?" 

"So, I didn't want to work for her anymore." 

"You didn't want to work for her anymore?" 

"Yeah, I let her go." 

"You fired her? I thought she was the client. Besides, you didn't want to work for _her_? You do remember what you work is, right?" 

He glanced at the blonde and nodded, "Yeah, it doesn't matter." He pauses. "Besides, she isn't all that. Just because someone looks good doesn't mean they are good in bed, you know?" 

Rory opened her mouth to say something but nothing comes out. She looked baffled and he found it funny. She wondered if it normal for him to comment about his clients, about her, and if he did what he said about her. 

As if reading her mind he reassured her, "Don't worry, I don't grade my clients or spread gossips about how they are in bed. But… she is different, she doesn't deserve any respect. And it's not like she cares anyway." 

Before she could respond to him Matt came back, "Okay, this is starting to get freaky." 

He handed Jess ten hundred-dollar bills. "This is just to talk to her, she says. Do you know how long I have to work to earn this much?" 

Jess sighed again and ran a hand through his hair, "Give the money back and tell her to fuck off." 

"Jess…" 

"Tell her," he insisted. 

Matt let his head drop and went back to the bar, not believing what he was about to do. 

Rory stared at him, "Okay, this is weird. She was going to pay $1 000 just to talk to you." 

"She hasn't coped with the fact I won't work for her anymore." 

A moment later the blonde was by their table, ignoring Rory and looking straight at him, "Jess…" 

"Fuck off, Terry." 

"Please, I just want to talk." 

"No, you want to convince me to go back to working to you again. It's not gonna happen, so don't waste your time." 

"I'll pay you more. Just say your price." 

"I don't want your money," he said, standing up and snapping at her. 

"Jess, please…" she touched his shoulder but he pulled away violently and stared at her. 

"Stop. It's over. I won't ever touch you again." 

She looked shocked and her eyes became watery. "Don't say that, please…" 

"You shouldn't even be here. Go home, go take care of your son." 

"This is about him, isn't it? If you didn't know this wouldn't be happening." 

He came closer to her face and said very slowly, "Go. Home." 

She sighed, annoyed and frustrated. Desperate. "God, I wish I had never had him." 

Suddenly, Jess' eyes became very dark and he stared deep into her eyes. "I've never hit a woman before but that's just about to change in five seconds if you don't get out of here. Don't ever even look at me again; I certainly won't waste my time even glancing at you." 

A couple of tears fell from her face but she quickly wiped them away, put her sunglasses on and left the restaurant. 

Jess sat down looking exhausted and sighed a few times, trying to recompose himself. He opened the small window and took a package of cigarettes from his jacket pocket, "Do you mind if I smoke?" 

She hated the smell but knew that right now was not the moment to say 'no' to him, so she simply shook her head. "I didn't know you smoked." 

"I usually don't. At least not when I'm working but she can really get under my skin." 

"I know it's none of my business but what was all of that about?" 

"She's just too much of a heartless bitch for me to deal with," he said while lightening his cigarette. 

Rory was taken aback by his choice of words and aggressiveness. "Oh. That's a good explanation," she tried. 

He laughed, "She is a snob, whiny and bitchy socialite who married a rich idiot who most probably fucks his secretary. So, since she wasn't getting enough at home she decided to take up a hobby. I was the hobby." 

"Oh," she gasped a little shocked. 

"I didn't really mind any of that. But one night she says it has to be quick and she usually likes to take her time, so I ask why and she says she left her four-year-old son with a neighbor to come see me." 

"Wow." 

"Exactly. Her son was practically living with the nanny so she could spend time with a gigolo." 

"That's sick. No offense." 

He waved his hand showing none was taken and nodded, "Tell me about it!" 

A few minutes later their pizza arrived and he threw his cigarette out the window before turning to her. 

"So, why I'm here again?" he asked her while they each grabbed a slice. 

"I- last time- you said-" 

"Deep breaths," he said amused. 

She took a deep breath before thinking how to word what she wanted to say. "Last time we met you said some stuff that I really didn't want to hear and no one knew or at least I never told anyone… but they were true." 

He kept looking at her, eating his pizza and trying to look as casual as possible about the subject. 

"And you just…knew it. And it's kind of scary and _very_ embarrassing, but a bit comforting, too. So I wanted to see you, talk to you… like people do. Just talk about silly stuff like 'how your dog is doing?'…" 

He looked at her with pity; she really had no life of her own. "How's your dog?" 

She looked down and blushed, even more embarrassed, "I don't have a dog." 

"Okay. Plant?" he tried again. 

She shook her head, concentrating hard on her pizza. 

"Any special interest? Sports? Hobbies?" 

"Not really." 

He sighed, "What do you do besides working?" he asked not knowing what else to ask. 

"Well, I go out with some friends once a month but we mainly talk about work. And sometimes I talk to my mother too, but she lives in Connecticut so it's hard for us to see each other. Uhm… sometimes, if I have some free time, I go to the movies. And I call you, obviously," she concluded and went back to eating her pizza. 

"What else?" he asked, waiting for her to continue, to say something that they could actually talk about. 

She tried to think of something, anything, but couldn't really. "That's it," she finally said. 

"Huh." He took a bite of his pizza, "And these friends, they are cool?" 

She shrugged, "In a way they are like me," she paused and smiled sadly. "That's not exactly good." She pauses again. "We used to be best friends in college but now we're all workaholics. I'm not sure of what we still have in common besides that but I guess we either see each other once a month and keep pretending or we'll have no friends at all." 

"Wow. That's depressing." 

"Thanks," she said sarcastically. He shrugged. She kept playing with the last slice of pizza and kept her eyes down, "What about you?" 

He looked up, "We're not here to talk about my life." 

"Come on, it sounds like you know everything about me – including things I'd never tell you – and I know nothing about you." 

He leaned back on his chair and stared at her, thinking. Then he leaned forwards on the table. "Sometimes I think I liked my life better when I wasn't working on this." 

"Really?" she asked, raising an eyebrow. 

He shrugged, "Sometimes." 

"Why?" 

"My life was simpler then. I wasn't a toy boy to anyone. I know I choose them but sometimes it's just about money and I can't afford to choose." He pauses and his eyes wonder through the place with no direction. "There are so many women that come to me because they don't know what else to do with their lives, as if sex would solve all their problems. It doesn't. It used to make me feel strange. Still does." 

A comfortable silence fell between them with his confession. She smiled and teased in a low voice, "Nah, I still don't believe you wouldn't want to have sex and get paid for it." 

He noticed the playful tone in her voice and smirked, "Well, with some clients I really don't mind," he just half joked. 

She looked at her watch a bit disappointed, "I should go." He nodded once and she continued. "Uhm… I don't know if you are too busy this week…" she blushed. 

"When?" 

"Friday?" 

"Same place?" 

"Yeah." 

"Okay." 

She stared fascinated at her lap for a couple of minutes before looking back up, "Actually," she pauses, "you said it'd be fine to be at my place, right?" she asked tentatively. 

He smiled, "Yeah, that would be fine." 

"Good," she said excited, taking one of her business cards and a pen out of her purse to write her address. "Eight-ish?" she asked, handing him the card. He nodded. 

She took a few bills for the lunch and a few for his company and put them all together on the table. "Thanks, Jess. Lunch was great." 

He mock saluted, "See you Friday." 

She left the restaurant and he waited until she was across the street to take his palm pilot out and check his totally filled schedule for the week. Then he took his cell phone out and called someone. 

"Hey Laura, it's Jess. I'm sorry but I can't make it Friday… We'll have to re-schedule it… Yeah, something came up… Monday is fine. Okay. Bye." 

He flipped the cell phone closed and leaned back on his chair, playing with the business card in his hands. He then ran a hand through his hair and sighed. His only thought the whole time being 'What the fuck is happening?' 


	6. The Good Mood

Title: Sex or Love

Author: Bru Cardoso

Summary: Rory is a successful businesswoman in her mid-twenties with no time - or skill - for relationships. Jess is a good looking guy who is willing to spend a night pleasing a woman as long as she pays for it. What happens when they meet? AU Lit

Disclaimer: Don't own the characters; do own the plot. You know the drill.

A/N: _Huge_ thanks to **ginnyclone** for the beta. I also have to thank _watergurl123, Yoshii, pbnk-ink, WriTeRgRl412, OrangePunk, Bittersweetbloodbaby, Spreeaholic1, ficcolo, katesque, Hallon, Lamalinche, pam halliwell, fanficreader, JPNeverlosetheButterflies, JXB0208, AcexReporter, bored247, jessroryfan24, nk-number1actress, CoffeeIsWhatIneed02, Melissa Larkin, JJ34, Lunatic Lorenzio, efka, Anonymous, Milo Maniac, Dione Robertson, Fickle Sobriguet, xh4z3L3y3sx, StaleCoffee, LitGG1982, Lee, lexi and Michela. _Thank you guys and everyone else who reviewed.

And _please_, drop a line telling me what you think of it; anything true goes - as always.

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**Chap 06**

Rory was in her office, looking through her glass wall at the few employees still in the office, finishing up their work or getting ready to leave. She looked at the clock and it read 7 pm. She shook her head. 'This is just wrong', she thought to herself before going to the door of her office.

"Hey guys," she called their attention. "It's 7 pm on a Friday...I'm sure you have better things to do. Just leave the rest of the work to do on Monday morning; it'll still be there. Go home to your wives, go out with your friends, have some fun."

They all stared at her in surprise for a moment; then they started gathering their things and leaving the office with smiles on their faces, sending little waves and 'Have a nice weekend's on her way.

She looked at the paper and files on her desk for a minute and picked up her purse leaving her office with a smile.

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Rory bit her lip and looked around the living room, walking from side to side with bare feet. She hadn't brought a boy home in a long time and in these circumstances she didn't know if it even mattered how her living room looked like. Maybe she should put some music on or prepare some drinks? But it was all about business, right? So...no need to try and create a romantic atmosphere. But, did it have to be so cold just because it was business?

And what should she wear for God's sake? He could knock any minute now and she was still on her business shirt and skirt; the only changes being that she took of her high heels, put her hair up and cleaned her face from the light make up she wore. Their 'date' would be at her place; they weren't going to meet anywhere before so she needn't dress up, but she couldn't meet him on her pajamas either! The only person who could help her on this was her mother but calling her to ask what she should wear to wait for her male hooker was not an option. She sighed, trying to think up a solution just when someone knocked on the door. She cringed and walked to the door.

"Hey," she said, opening it slowly.

"Hi, just got home from work?"

"Yeah, something like that," she said opening the door wider to let him in. He walked in and looked around the apartment.

"Nice place you have here."

"Thanks," she closed the door and played with her hands, not knowing what to do.

"Still uncomfortable with this?" he asked amused.

"Yeah, well… it's still weird for me. But I'm not sure if it would be much different if I weren't paying. Having a guy over is always…"

"Hard," he nodded, understanding her. He walked over to her and pulled the clip from her hair, letting it fall around her face. "You look good," he said.

She blushed, "Thank you for lying."

"No, really, you look real. Bare feet, just got home from work, clean face, hair a bit messed up…" he smirked. She bit her bottom lip and her hands through her hair to smooth it down. "I like it. Really."

"You really have some sick pleasure in teasing me and seeing me uncomfortable, right?"

"No, I just like to make you blush, really. It's fun."

And even though she tried not to, she couldn't help but blush at his words.

"Come here," he pulled her hand and her body bumps into his. He smirked, "Hey."

"Hi," she muttered quietly. He leaned down and started kissing her lightly but it doesn't take long to become more passionate. When they broke away she rested his forehead against his, "You want something to drink?"

He chuckled. "I'm fine-" he started but seeing the look on her face he changed his mind, "but I could use a beer, yeah."

"Okay, good, I'll go get it," she said eagerly, going to the kitchen.

He smirked, "Do you mind if I put some music on?"

"No, make yourself at home," she yelled from the kitchen.

He went to her stereo and pushed the 'play' button and a second later 'Unbelievable' by EMF was blasting through the speakers. He took a step back, surprised and pushed 'stop' before going through her CDs. A couple of minutes later she came back from the kitchen with two beers in hand just to listen the beginning of 'She Will Be Loved' by Maroon 5 being played.

She looked at him and he smirked, trying to fake an innocent face but knowing he was failing miserably.

"You just had to choose that song, huh?"

"I didn't see anything wrong with it, do you?"

"No, nothing at all," she offered him a beer, but he got both and put them on the coffee table. "Come here," he asked and she hesitantly did as she was told. Not wasting a second he started kissing her and before she could understand what was happening, she was lying on the couch with him on top of her.

She giggled, "God, I haven't made out in a couch since I was a teenager, I think."

He chuckled, but didn't stop, working his way to her neck and unbuttoning her shirt. She started pulling his shirt over his head and undoing his jeans. His lips made their way down to her breast while he ran his palms up the back of her knees and to her thighs.

"What are you trying to do? Drive me crazy?" she asked with a strangled voice.

He pulled away from her breast to look at her and raised an eyebrow, "I just want to make you feel beautiful?" he quoted the lyrics of the song.

She laughed quietly, not sure how much mocking and truth were in that sentence before slapping him on the shoulder lightly.

He playfully shook his head, "I try to do my best work and that's how I'm re-paid." And as a mean of revenge he attacked her mouth again, full of want.

A few minutes later, when she felt things were getting too close to the point of no coming back she pulled away from the kiss. "Not that I'm not greatly enjoying this - cuz I really am – but you want to do it on my couch!" she asked, a bit unsure.

He looked at her for a moment, seizing her and suddenly a smirk covered his features, a smirk that made her regret opening her mouth. He quickly stood up and took her by the waist, throwing her over his shoulder and walking to her room.

"Ahh!" was her only response as she was shocked and surprised at the same time. "Jess put me down! That's not why I'm paying you! Put me down!"

He laughed and tapped her bottom, "Stop complaining when you know you're having fun!" he berated. "Besides, we're almost in your room," he said just before throwing her on her bed.

She smiled a little and watched his face while his eyes roamed her body. This time she didn't try to cover herself or make him stop. It wasn't just because she didn't want to hear him saying all those things again, and she definitely wasn't comfortable with him looking at her like that. But she trusted him; she really did. And if anyone had to look at her this way, she would rather be him than anyone else.

He put his knee on the mattress beside her leg and hovered over her. "You're getting better at this. Already decided how you want it?"

She bit her lip, thinking for a second. "Just like it's been so far," she answered.

He grinned and started kissing her again.

VVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVV

She rolled over in bed and found the other side empty. She sighed, not sure if had dreamt or if he had just left – which didn't make sense. She sat on bed and put a hand to her head; there was no point on thinking about that at the moment. She stood up to go to the kitchen and get herself a glass of water but as soon as she stepped on the living room she screamed.

Jess jumped from the couch where he was laying, startled, "What the fuck?"

"Sorry, I just thought… what are you doing here!"

"Well, you asked me to come tonight, remember?" he said laying back down on the couch.

"No, I mean here, in my living room. Why aren't you in bed?" she asked, going to sit next to him.

"Oh, I wasn't sleepy. So I thought I'd read a bit."

"You read, huh?" she asked interested.

He shrugged, "Not much."

"Howl?" she questioned, reading the cover of the book. "I love this book. I have a copy somewhere among those shelves," she said, pointing to a few shelves full of books on the other side of the living room.

He nodded, "I know, this is yours."

"But you're writing on it," she said quietly and then accusingly, "You're writing on my book!"

He shook his head and chuckled, "I tease, I offend, I provoke, I'm smart-ass and all you do is blush. I make some notes on your book and then you get all bothered and pissed off."

"But it's my book!" she repeats as explanation.

"Take a breath, you're going to thank me when I'm done!"

She snorted, "I don't think so!"

"You got all bothered and pissed off because of a book…" he pondered and concluded, "It's hot! You should do that more often… stand up for yourself."

"I'm not doing it for myself, I'm doing it for my book! Now stop destroying it!"

He smirks, "Oh, you'll have to get it first."

She reached for the book but he held it over his head. She reached again but he dodged her. She tried a third time and this time she almost reached it, but ended up losing her balance and falling half straddling him.

She looked up blushing but before he could tease her about it she straddled him and reached for the book again. This time she got it. But he wasn't paying attention to the book; instead he was looking up at her. He pulled her down with one hand and kissed her deeply. She was surprised by his spontaneity but kissed back. They continued to make out in the couch for a while, until she pulled back and rested her forehead against his, smiling. "You're still not vandalizing my book."

He chuckled, "Okay, I was just writing some notes on the margins for you, but if you don't want…"

"Notes?" she asked interested, opening her book. She saw the margins filled with his small handwrite and raised an eyebrow. "You've read this before," she half affirmed half questioned.

"Yeah. I've never said I hadn't."

"But you said you didn't read much!"

"Well, what is much?"

She sat back on his lap, reading one of the notes when he took the book from her hands and closed it. "You can read that later, right now I think there are better things to do."

She smirked, "It seems I'm not the only one having fun."

He shrugged, "I was just trying to provide the best service, make you take the most of your time but if you don't want…"

She leaned forward and started kissing him again, "Oh, I do want."

He smirked into the kiss and his hands started from her belly to her breasts but before he could reach his destination she broke the kiss.

"Okay, I know I'm a mood killer right now but I can't stop thinking about the way you acted with Terry."

He sighed and leaned back on the couch, "You're right, you are a mood killer."

She bit her lip, "I know, it's just… you seemed so bothered about what she had done."

"You remember what she did, right?"

"I know, I know. I'm not defending her here. I'm just saying that the way you treated her, it was pure disgust. I know what she did was sick but I didn't think it would have such a strong reaction on you," she paused. He remained silent, so she continued. "Unless that's not all," she tried in a low voice.

He looked away for a minute, his face expressionless. "Maybe it hit a little too close to home."

"Ah," she nodded, letting him say whatever he wanted but not probing.

"My father ran away just after I was born and my mother just fell apart. At least I like to think that's why she was like that. Anyway, when she wasn't working or with her boyfriend of the week, she was drunk. I had to raise myself and when I got older I had to take care of her drunk ass," he paused then continued a little angrier. "If she couldn't be a mother, then she shouldn't have gotten pregnant in the first place. And it's the same with Terry. She just got pregnant cuz her husband needed an heir and his family was pushing them for it to be soon. She never wanted to have a kid, she just wanted the presents her husband gave her, including a trip she took me as a 'vacation', to convince her to get pregnant. How shallow is that? It's fucking crazy!"

She smiled sadly. "You said it yourself, it's over. You never have to see her again."

"I know, but I feel bad for her kid," he said, calmer. He couldn't believe he really had told her these things about his past, but now that he had there was way to take it back.

She put a hand on his cheek, "There's nothing you can do. But if this kid has any luck he'll be like you and raise himself."

He smiled sadly and rested his hands on her thighs, "It's not that easy."

She nodded, "I bet." She looked up and at the expression on his face and was sure he was remembering those moments of his past. She raised his face and kissed him, "So, was that story about providing the best service really true? Cuz I'd really like to go back to that room and check it out."

He smirked and stood up still holding her while she wrapped her legs around his waist. "I thought you'd never ask!" he said, carrying her back to the room.


	7. The Bad Mood

Title: Sex or Love

Author: Bru Cardoso

Summary: Rory is a successful businesswoman in her mid-twenties with no time - or skill - for relationships. Jess is a good-looking guy who is willing to spend a night pleasing a woman as long as she pays for it. What happens when they meet? AU Lit

Disclaimer: Don't own the characters; do own the plot. You know the drill.

A/N: _Huge_ thanks to **ginnyclone** for the beta.

Thank you to everyone who reviewed and a especial thank you to:

**someone**: very scary your threat. Just because of that I had to update sooner ;)

**Ladyjane**: thank you and cotton candy? I LOVE cotton candy!

_**Lexi, OrangePunk, Bittersweetbloodbaby, efka, Michela, pbnk-ink** : thank you for reviewing every chap and letting me know what you think. It's always great to read your reviews_

_**jessroryfan24, Squealing Lit. Fan, miloismine,litfan1824** : thank you!_

_**pam halliwell**: thank you, and I totally get what you mean about "You'll be loved", but I think there are better songs – not more romantic, just more personal – that could be played in a situation like that. Since he was just teasing her it was fine, but later on it gets more intimate – I think._

And _please_, drop a line telling me what you think of it; anything true goes - as always.

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**Chap 07**

"Hey, Mom! How are you doing?" Rory greeted as she flipped her phone open.

"Hey, hon," Lorelai said hesitantly. "Are you okay?"

"Oh yeah, I'm just great. What about you? And Will? Luke?"

"We're all fine." Lorelai paused. "Did something happen?" she asked cautiously. Rory was way too cheery to be her 'normal-self'.

Rory swallowed, "Uhm… yeah."

The line went silent for a minute and then Lorelai sing-sang, "Someone got laid…"

"Mom!" Rory berated.

"Oh, it's true! Who is he? Is he good? Of course he's good, otherwise you wouldn't be in such a good mood."

"If you're going to act like a four year old I'm going to hang up."

"No, no, no! Come on, what's his name? Tell me everything! It's so exciting! I haven't been on a date in years and it's been forever since your last boyfriend."

"Mom, there is nothing to tell."

Lorelai scoffed, "Of course there is!"

Rory sighed; there was no way she was going to tell her mom the truth. She bit her lower lip and closed her eyes tightly, "It's still new, and I don't know if there is anything there… But if it gets serious you'll be the first to know," she half lied, half shared her hopes.

Lorelai sighed, "Okay, okay. But keep me posted, alright?"

Rory smiled, "Yeah, sure. So, not that I don't enjoy this conversation but is there any special reason for this call?"

"Oh yeah. You see, since I'm a very organized and thoughtful woman I decided to call you in advance to tell you the date of my 'second honeymoon'."

"So Luke made you call me to give me some time notice, huh?" Rory asked knowingly.

"I'd have done it anyways," Lorelai defended.

"Of course; one day prior."

"You know the saying; what counts is the intention."

"Yeah, and that helps a lot," she said sarcastically. "Okay, when is your honeymoon?"

"In two weeks."

"Fine. Can you drop Will at my place or do you want me to pick him up?"

"We'll drop him at your place Friday at seven. I don't want to cause you anymore trouble than I have to."

"Thanks. And it's no trouble at all to spend the weekend with my little brother," she said with a smile.

"Seriously Ror, thank you. We were really in need of a break. You're an angel for taking care of Will."

"Anytime."

"Okay, I'll let you go. See you in two weeks, baby."

"Bye, Mom."

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Rory tried her hardest to apply lipstick to her lips while riding in the back seat of the speeding cab without running it to her cheek. Checking her image on the small mirror she carried on her purse, she smiled. She looked happy, and she really was.

The cab pulled over in front of the restaurant she came to once a month. As soon as she stepped inside she found the table with three of her best friends already waiting. She greeted each of them and sat next to Samantha who, as it was to be expected, was on the phone trying to close yet another deal.

"Little Chinese men?" Rory asked Jen and Layla, motioning to Samantha's phone.

They shook their head smirking. "Little Japanese men. From what I've got so far, they won't know what hit them," Jen told her.

Rory smirked at her friend; that sounded like Samantha. A few minutes the other two girls arrived and they ordered their special: lots of red wine. After their routine talk about business they went back to their main topic last month.

"So, who is going to start?" Judy asked.

"There isn't much to tell," Layla started with a grin. "Except that I called Josh. Apparently I had forgotten how good he was. Or he got even better. Either way I'm not complaining."

The other women on the table chuckled and she nudged Clara's side, "Oh, you're laughing at me? Why don't you let Clara tell you her news?"

They all gasped and a couple of them even pointed at her. Jen was the most shocked one, and after her jaw dropped she had to say the only words in her mind, "Clara, even you?"

Clara raised her hands in defense, "Hey, you guys kept bragging about how good and easy it was and you know the saying… desperate times call for desperate measures."

Samantha closed her cell phone just then, "Wow, the world is really coming to an end. Even sweet Clara went to a hooker. At least tell me he was good."

Layla interrupted, "Oh yeah, it was Josh's friend, Nick. Josh recommended him, said he was quite the lady's man, very romantic and discreet. I thought he'd be a good match to Clara."

"Nick, as in Claudia's former 'employee'?" Judy asked.

"Claudia used to go to a hooker?" Rory asked surprised.

Samantha turned to her, "Please! As if she would stand to be all that time her fiancé spent traveling alone, with no fun at all."

"Wow. Nick and Claudia?" Clara asked a little worried.

Samantha petted her on the shoulder in a comforting way, "Don't worry, hon. They've stopped doing business just before she got married. Now, if that's going to last I have no idea." She looked at the other girls, "Okay, and how about you, Judy?"

"Well, I called Mike and left a message on his machine. Today he called back. It seems he's on vacation but he'll call me to book a date as soon as he gets back," she said with a small smile.

"Good for you, girl," Layla rubbed her shoulder supportively. Rory wanted to laugh at how bizarre the situation was. She felt like she was inside a Picasso painting.

"And you, Jen? Have you found casual sex or a date?"

"Nope. Our last conversation was very inspiring, so I called Jack and it is like we never called it off."

"That's nice. He's friends' with Dan, I think…"

"I guess… I wouldn't know, actually. We don't talk much, if you know what I mean."

Samantha laughed, "Understandably." Then she turned to Rory, "Okay, now you're the only one missing. Have you called the guy I gave you the card? Jess?"

Rory smiled a bit inside thinking about him, but she didn't want to share that with her friends and talk about him like he was a piece of meat. She shook her head slightly, "Sorry. It just isn't me."

Samantha shook her head in disappointment, "Your loss, you don't know what you are missing. Charlotte says he's just amazing in bed. From what she tells me he's just getting better and better."

Rory chocked on her wine, "What?"

"Exactly what I'm saying. Word on the street is that he's one of the best. I haven't tried him because I thought you would and you're all worried about morals… Besides I'm so satisfied with Dan," she said flashing a feline grin. "But I've heard so many compliments about him that I just might give him a shot."

Rory took a deep breath and gulped the rest of her wine down trying hard to keep her heart in control and her face blank as she said, "Hope he meets your expectations."

After that she just ignored all conversation and ten minutes later she left the restaurant saying she had a splitting headache. When she got home she went straight to the bathroom to throw up.

VVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVV

He knocked on the door and looked up with a smile when she opened it.

"Hey, how was your day?" he stepped into the apartment and kissed the corner of her mouth. She didn't respond to the touch.

She looked at the floor, then at him. "Good. Let's go to my room. I don't want to mess up my living room," she said coolly.

"O-kay," he answered hesitantly, following her down the hall. When he got into the room she was taking her shirt over her head and stepping out of her shoes. He followed her lead not really understanding what was happening. She went to him and kissed his bare chest and her way up to his neck, at times biting and leaving some marks behind. He winced once or twice when she got a little too rough for his like, but kept it quiet.

When she reached his jaws she drew back and looked at him, avoiding his eyes, " I want to be on top and I want it to be fast and rough and quick. No kisses either," she said, giving orders like her grandmother would do to a maid.

He sensed the change and his eyes became dark, "Raw."

She nodded silently.

He nodded too, "As you wish." He stepped closer to her, letting his hands roam her body and take the last few pieces of clothing on her body off. Then he looked her to the bed, all the while his hands wondering through her body, but his lips never touching her skin. He turned them both and sat down, bringing her with him in a way she ended up straddling him.

She gasped but he didn't get any gentler. If she wanted rough, that's what she was going to get. He reached for her nightstand where he had left a few condoms a few days ago and got one. Before she could realize what was happening he was lying on his back on the bed, moving her so he could get inside her. A moment later he was thrusting mercilessly into her. No warning, no foreplay; nothing. She glared at him as he helped her move up and down onto him. He just raised an eyebrow, "Raw, right?"

She closed her eyes trying to ignore him and concentrate on the feelings he was sending through her whole body. He gripped her waist and she opened her eyes. "You want to come, right?" he asked. She nodded mutely and he reached one hand in front of her while the other kept helping her move. He started playing with her clit and she moaned. He grabbed one of her hands that rested on his chest for support and took it between her legs, showing her what to do. When he was sure she was doing a good job he went back to grip both her sides tightly, making her ride him faster and harder. She couldn't feel her legs anymore, and even though she would never admit, she was glad he had taken control. She kept riding him for a few more minutes and then her body went rigid as her senses overwhelmed her. Still, he didn't stop or slow down until he was sure all waves of her orgasm had faded.

She opened her eyes, trying to calm her breathing but not really succeeding. He took her by her sides and set her on the other side of the bed before standing up to gather his clothes.

"You didn't come," she stated with a hint of accusation.

He smirked cruelly, "Anger doesn't really work for me. And it's not about me coming; it's about you. And from what I see I did a fucking good job. Pun intended."

"Oh, so you only come with your other clients now?" she asked in a hatred tone.

He stopped mid-way while putting on his underwear and looked at her with icy eyes, "It's $300; cash, please."

She reached for her purse and took the money from her wallet, throwing it at his side of the bed. He took the money and shoved it into his pocket. "Thank you and until next time," he said putting his socks on.

"What are you doing? You're staying."

He turned around to her and chuckled coldly, "Uhm… I don't think so."

"But… you can't!"

"I'm leaving," he said firmly while pulling his jeans up.

"I pay you to stay," she said, bossy like a five year old when told she can't have the toy she wants.

He turned to her with a cruel and cold smirk on his lips, "Well, I'm not that desperate for money yet."

She gasped but he paid no attention, just grabbed his shirt and headed for the door.

"So what? You're going to just cross my name from your list of clients?" she yelled, following him to the living room while wrapping a robe around her body.

"If you want to have a sex life this is not the moment to give me any ideas," he turned back around to leave. She grabbed the closest portrait in sight and threw it on the wall behind him. He turned around with slightly widened eyes.

"Fuck you," she cursed through gritted teeth.

He rolled his eyes, "Right back at ya," he said before slamming the door behind him.


	8. The Drunkness

Title: Sex or Love

Author: Bru Cardoso

Summary: Rory is a successful businesswoman in her mid-twenties with no time - or skill - for relationships. Jess is a good looking guy who is willing to spend a night pleasing a woman as long as she pays for it. What happens when they meet? AU Lit

Disclaimer: Don't own the characters; do own the plot. You know the drill.

A/N: Huge thanks to **Ginny Clone** for the beta. Thank you everyone for the reviews, I _really_ appreciate them. I promised some people I'd update on the weekend but I've partied a bit too much and wasn't able to... sorry. This is dedicated to my boys, who made this last week simply amazing... specially to **daniel**. Thank you for making it worth it. Please, review and let me know what you think - as always, anything true goes.

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**Chap 08**

"Hello?"

"Hey, Jess. It's Rory. I know you have the 48-hour rule, and that you must be busy since your schedule is always full, but I'll pay you twice what she would pay. Just name your price, but please… I really need you today."

He sighed, "What time?"

"Are you free now?"

"Your apartment?"

"Yeah."

"I'll be there in half an hour," he said coldly.

Half an hour later he was staring at her door. It's not like he wanted to get in and have her bitching around like the others always do to him. But there is always someone to treat him like dirty; either it's her or some other client, so why should he care?

He knocked on the door and she instantly opened it letting him in. She walked to the living room and he followed close behind, taking his jacket and shoes off in the way. "How do you want it?" he asked before looking up and finding her sitting on the floor in front of her coffee table with a saltshaker, a few lemons, a knife and a bottle of tequila. He suddenly frowned and looked back at her, just now realizing how dejected she looked.

"Oh, yeah, right! I took you from your job!" she said, slamming a hand to her forehead and going to look for her purse, "I'm so sorry, really. I'm sure the other woman was devastated."

"Rory-"

"I mean, I know I would be if I were her. Anyway, back to the point. How much do I own you?"

"Rory-" he tried again, but she ignored him.

"$250 to start, $150 for overnight… and even if she goes wild I think it'd cost about $1000. So $2,000?"

"Rory!"

"$2,500?"

"Rory, stop it! There was no other client!" he told her.

"But-but you're always so busy; your schedule is always full!"

"Today is my day off," he stated simply.

"What? What do you mean 'day off?"

"You have weekends off of work, right? So, why shouldn't I?"

"Well, I had never thought about it…"

Jess scoffed, "What? Do you think that what I do is not tiring or emotionally exhausting? Have you ever tried to sell yourself to someone for a night?"

"I didn't mean…"

"And besides, not everyone can be a workaholic like you. And if I were, it would be a double problem; workaholic and sex addicted. Can you imagine that?"

"Wow… I mean, I didn't mean that… I'm sorry…"

"You should stop apologizing and start thinking before saying shit like that for a change."

"I know, you're right. I'm sorry."

"I shouldn't have come here on my day off. I don't need shit like this," he said turning back to the door and in less than a second she was crawling and holding his legs, "Please, don't go! I'll do anything! I promise!"

"Anything?" he asked with an eyebrow raised.

She hesitated for a moment, but right now she was completely hopeless and too fucking desperate for the smallest act of affection; so she said, "Yeah", because she really would do anything.

He sighed, knowing she really was desperate, and looked at the coffee table that had been untouched since he arrived and noticed for the first time that the tequila bottle was half empty. "How much did you drink?"

She looked down, loosing her grip on his legs, "Some."

He scoffed, "Great answer, Rory!" He bent down and picked her up effortlessly, carrying her to the bathroom. He sat her on the toilet seat before turning on the water in the tub and staring to undress her.

She looked at him, her limbs like the ones of a rag doll, while he took her shirt off. "To do it in the tub? I thought you were going to ask for an expensive car or something. Fuck, I would pay you to do that!"

He finally got too annoyed and looked her in the eye, "Could you please, shut the fuck up?" he said angrily.

Since she had promised anything she stayed quiet and silently watched him strip to his boxers. She wanted to comment on the fact that he usually wore briefs and not boxers, but remained fucking quiet, as he had ordered.

He touched the water to test the temperature and then turned it off, offering her a hand to step into the tub. The water was steaming hot, but she didn't say a word, instead she watched fascinated as he stepped into the tub facing her.

"Okay," he said much calmer, "now, hold on to me and don't let go, okay?"

She furrowed her eyebrows, not understanding, but nodded. He wrapped an arm around her tightly, murmuring under his breath, "This is the part that I hate" and sighed before turning on the shower in full force on ice-cold water.

She screamed in surprise and maybe in pain of the cold water that burned her skin and tried to step out, but he wrapped his arm tighter around while his other hand went to hold her head in place, so he could kiss her and muffle her screams.

After a few minutes of ice-cold water running down their bodies, Rory calmed downs and gave in. Only then Jess turned off the shower and lay down in the tub bringing her with him.

He laid her limp between his legs and turned on the hot water again. Their muscles started to relax and she rolled her head to his shoulder, where he felt her hot tears running down his arm.

"Anything you wanna say to me?"

She swallowed still looking away, trying to hide how strangled her voice really was but not succeeding, "This situation is very embarrassing," she said with a small laugh that was between bitter and ashamed.

"Why? Is it embarrassing to have your gigolo seeing you like this? Or is it the fact that you called me that makes it that much worse?"

She turned her face and looked at him with red eyes, "No, it's because _you_ had to see me like this. And I'm not sure about what I said to you but whatever it was, I'm sorry. Sometimes José Cuervo can be your best friend, and sometimes it can trick you into doing things that you will regret a minute later."

"Whatever," he said, moving to stand up, but she grabbed his arm. "Can you stay? Please?"

He sat down behind her again, reluctantly.

"You're angry at me," she stated.

"I was fucking angry three seconds after I got here, now I'm way beyond."

"I never get this drunk; I didn't know what to do. If I wasn't this desperate I wouldn't have called you."

"So you called your gigolo to fuck you back to reality?" he said, incredulous and furious.

"No, I called the only person that I thought would come; even if that meant that I'd have to pay him to come. And you know today wasn't about sex, not even for a second. I just didn't know what to do with my very drunk self and didn't want to be alone."

"Look at me," he ordered harshly. "Don't you ever call me again to help your drunken ass. If you call me drunk again, I won't come. Not to fuck you or to help you."

She looked down and let more tears fall. "Okay," she said in a small voice.

He looked at her tears falling and got up. Then he took her into his arms and out of the tub, sitting her on the rug. He then looked for a towel and started to dry her body slowly while she just watched him, like a child. When he finished towel-drying her hair he carried her to her room and dressed her in some loose sweat pants and a sweatshirt. He laid her on the bed carefully and then lay next to her sighing, obviously exhausted.

He relaxed and turned his head to look at her. "Any special reason for suddenly getting so friendly with that bottle of tequila?"

She bit her bottom lip, "I got a promotion. Now I'm the CEO of the whole east coast. My salary is almost three times higher. I think it's something I've always dreamed of, the thing I've been working so hard for these last few years."

"Congratulations," he said with a tone between baffled and neutral.

"I didn't know who to call to tell my good news. I mean, my friends are probably working or doing something related to work and most likely they would get jealous instead of happy for me. My mom..." she hesitated and sighed before continuing. "She's great, but she has her own family now with my step-father and my half-brother. And, don't get me wrong, I love them but I don't think she would have the time for me. And even if she got five minutes to celebrate, she would have no idea about what I do or what a difference it makes or why it is so great for me - or it should be so great for me." She took a deep breath and added. "And I don't think I have anyone else in my life. Just, maybe, you."

He listened to her intently while she poured her heart to him. He thought maybe he pitied her a little, but he was still too angry at her from their last encounter to try and comfort her. "What do you mean 'or it should be'?" he questioned before getting on his side and just slightly closer to her.

"I don't know... I thought when I got this position, when I finally had everything I'd set as my goal, then I would be happy and everything would fall in to place. But just a few hours ago I heard the news and look at me; my world is falling apart."

He laughed, "You know you are a drama queen, right?"

"It's easy for you to say. You have everything; friends, dates, you earn enough, you're smart... I thought I could have all those things later but I feel like I need them now."

"Everyone needs people and you can't just set a date to get your dream job, or start dating or anything like that. You try too hard to control your life instead of taking it the best way you can."

"And the best you can take yours is to charge desperate women to sleep with them?"

He glared at her, "Now, we're talking about you, not me."

"Well, since you're openly criticizing my life I thought I had the right to at least ask a question," she retorted and looked at him expectantly.

"What?" he asked. She raised her eyebrows as to make her point. "You want an answer?" he snorted.

"You know, when someone asks you something they usually want to get an answer, so yes, I want one."

He sighed, "Okay, so it wasn't my dream job or my first option for a job for that matter," he paused pondering what to say and then continued, "So, I finished high school and I didn't know what to do with my life. All I knew was that I needed to move out, so Matt and I rented a place and we both started working our asses off. He worked at a grocery store and in construction, which really sucked. I worked in a book store and in this really fancy restaurant. And of course, even though we worked our asses off we were always broke; we could barely pay rent and food."

He paused and looked at her, not sure if he wanted to go on, but she was watching him intently, so he sighed and continued, "So, one day I'm serving a table with a few girls on the restaurant. Suddenly they are all gone, except for one. She calls me out and orders a drink and when I'm just about to turn around she shoves a napkin in my pocket. Well, I go get her drink and I take the napkin and read it. She was offering a good amount of money to sleep with me. So obviously I think I'm going crazy or something, I go back to her table with her drink and ask what that meant and she quite bluntly asks if that was enough or if I wanted more to spend the night with her. At first I though I would start laughing, turn around and leave her there, but then I remembered my empty fridge and she was quite pretty. So I smirked and asked twice the price. She accepted and that's how it started. Then Matt got the job at the restaurant we went that first day, which is much better than his previous jobs and gets him enough money to survive. And that girl gave good recommendations of me to her friends and so on and so on... and I'm assuming one of these friends was your friend."

"I guess."

"So, disappointed there was no tragic story behind me becoming a gigolo?"

"You like using that word, huh?"

"Not especially, but what's the point of hiding the truth?"

She was quiet for a minute thinking, "You're so smart, why didn't you go to college? You could have done so much better...still can. I'm not judging or anything, but you could."

He laughed, "Okay, how much school costs? I barely had money to eat! And I couldn't count on anyone; my family is a bunch of nuts."

"Right," she said, remembering their conversation a couple of weeks ago when he told her about his absent father and drunk mother. Just then she realized in what position she had put him in and gasped, "Oh my God, I'm sorry. I made you come here and take care of my drunken ass when you told me how you hated to take care of your mother and..."

He turned to her and cut her off, "It's okay. Actually, it's okay but there is nothing to do about it now. But I meant it; I'm never coming near you again if you're drunk. I don't care how bad feel or how desperate you are. I've been through all that once and I'm not going back again."

She nodded silently, glad it was somehow okay between them. She knew things were still stirred up and that he wasn't going to forgive her any time soon for what she had done tonight and in their last encounter. She wasn't sure how she felt herself, she still didn't know how to deal with the idea of him being in bed with other girls, girls she probably knew from work or social parties. But in all truth, she couldn't blame him; from the very start she knew what she was getting herself into. She was the one who turned to him, called him and started the whole thing, so what right did she have in feeling betrayed? She looked up at him and sighed, throwing a leg over his. Probably none, but still that heavy painful feeling just wouldn't leave her chest and for some reason she felt like she couldn't really breath.


	9. The Business Party

Title: Sex or Love

Author: Bru Cardoso

Summary: Rory is a successful businesswoman in her mid-twenties with no time - or skill - for relationships. Jess is a good looking guy who is willing to spend a night pleasing a woman as long as she pays for it. What happens when they meet? AU Lit

Disclaimer: Don't own the characters; do own the plot. You know the drill.

A/N: _Huge _thanks to **Hallon** for being amazing and beta-ing this chap. Thank you to everyone who reviewed and please, drop a line telling me what you think; as always anything true goes. )

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**Chap 09**

She was miserable. Everyone could see that, and even though she hadn't gone back to her dictatorship days, her attitude had changed. There were no smiles, she wouldn't talk more than necessary and although she wouldn't make anyone do overtime or spend their weekends in the office, she was always the first to arrive and the last to leave. There was even a rumor that she never left the office.

She didn't know what to do. First she treated him like a paid slave and then she called him asking for help in a situation where she didn't really have the right, one he most certainly didn't want to go through. And now she didn't have the courage to call him and go back to the way things were; she wasn't sure if she even wanted that. Of course she knew he'd go back to working for her if she asked, but even now that they were apart all she could think about was all the women he slept with when he wasn't with her and it was driving her insane. She just couldn't seem to accept the simple fact that she had no claim on him.

After what seemed months, but was barely a week and a half, she was getting ready to go out for the first time since their fight. After her promotion her company decided to throw a party to call more clients and 'celebrate' her new position. Of course, she had to go and socialize, trying her hardest to get new deals with possible sponsors. Putting on lipgloss and checking her image in the mirror she sighed. This was going to be a long night, in a small room full of couples, except for her.

She arrived at the party fashionably late, wearing a long discreet dress that made her look elegant and simple at the same time. The first couple of hours she spent making small talk and exchanging business cards, until she saw something completely unexpected. Tina, a well-known CEO from a rival company, arrived accompanied by none other than Jess. Her jaw dropped and she couldn't help but stare at the couple as Tina approached her.

"Hello, Rory. It's nice to see you again."

"Hi, Tina. I'm glad you could come," Rory focused her attention on the woman in front of her.

"Of course. I guess congratulations are in order. I've heard you're the CEO of the west side now."

"Thank you."

"Yes, congratulations," Jess spoke for the first time.

She turned to him a bit surprised, "Thank you."

"Oh, right. I don't think you've met. Rory, this is Jess, my date."

"Nice to meet you, Jess," she said, still shocked.

"My pleasure," he answered coolly.

"Well, I guess we should do the rounds and greet the others. But I'm sure we'll have the opportunity to talk about the new ramifications that our companies could have together later on tonight."

"I look forwards to it," Rory said absentmindedly.

Both Tina and Jess walked away and Rory grabbed the first glass of champagne that passed in front of her, downing it in one gulp. The night would be even longer than expected.

Rory walked around the party, talking business to all serious guys in suits and stern-looking women in formal dresses. Finally, she was too tired of talking business and approached a group of women and took a glass of champagne that the waiter was offering them. Rory wasn't really interested in their small talk, so she just nodded and said some "yeah"s absentminded until she heard one of the women saying his name.

"So, who was that fine man that you came with?" someone asked Tina.

Another woman answered for her with a knowingly smile, "Jess."

"Jess, huh? Is he a date or one of your 'special friends'?"

Tina giggled, "A very special friend."

All women laughed except for Rory, who just stared at them, stunned.

"So, do tell, is he good?"

"Oh, yeah. You wouldn't believe the things he can do. Every time I meet up with him I end up exhausted."

Rory was paralyzed watching the unbelievable scene unfolding in front of her. In then corner of her eye she saw Jess approaching them, but stopping just a few feet away when he heard their conversation. She watched his face go from bored to anger, and finally to indifference. But she knew he was just masking the hurt and disgust.

"Is he too expensive?" another one asked.

"For the work he provides? Absolutely not. He is worth every penny."

The women started laughing again until one of them noticed him and nodded her head in his direction, warning the others. They all turned around to face him, but only Tina spoke up.

"Oh, dear, you don't mind us talking, right?" she asked, not the least ashamed.

His eyes were hard, but his face was neutral, "Of course not. May I get you another glass of champagne?"

She smirked, handing him her empty glass, "Please."

He took the glass and turned around, walking to the bar with Rory's eyes burning holes in his back. She sighed and excused herself before going after him.

"Hey Tim, another glass of champagne to the bitch and a double shot of scotch for me."

Rory walked to him hesitantly. "Hey," she said timidly.

"Not now, Rory," he groaned.

"I-I'm not here to fight or anything."

Tim placed the drinks on the counter in front of Jess and went over to attend another guest.

"Then what are you here for?" he asked downing his scotch.

"I-I… I don't know," she said baffled.

He chuckled.

"Come home with me," she said suddenly.

He looked at her coldly, "I'm already booked for the night, as you could see a few moments ago. You should call with some notice, you know that," he told her snidely.

"I'm not asking you to work for me tonight. I'm just _asking_ you to come home with me. I'm inviting you."

"So you can brag to your friends?"

"They don't know about you."

"Ashamed of what they might think?"

She shook her head, "They would talk about you and what they've heard about you as if you were a piece of meat. You aren't and you shouldn't be treated like one."

"Nice speech from someone who is just like them."

She looked down ashamed, "I was pissed off," she offered as explanation, but he wasn't buying it.

"Why?"

"Jess…" she tried to wave it off, but he wouldn't give in so easily.

"Why?" he asked again, a hint of anger in his voice.

She looked down and then to the side, taking a deep breath. It was too hard to admit it, but she knew he she owed him the truth, "I was jealous, okay?"

He laughed bitterly, "You're kidding me, right?" She was silent. "You've got to be kidding me!" he said, even angrier.

She shook her head, not looking at him, "Come home with me? Just to talk or whatever."

"So you won't be jealous?" he mocked.

"So tonight you won't be treated like you're nothing, just something to be used and thrown away," she paused. "And yeah, also so I won't stay up all night wondering in whose bed you are."

He sighed and pondered over what he wanted to do for once. "I'm leaving now, I can't stand this place anymore. I'll be waiting on your door. Don't leave right now or someone might notice."

She nodded, "I'll go in about an hour."

"Okay," he said, turning around to leave.

"Wait," she grabbed his hand. He turned to her and she delved into her purse until she found her key and handed it to him. "Make yourself at home," she offered with a small uncertain smile. And for the first time in the last couple of weeks she saw his smile. Just then she realized how much she really missed it. He just took the key and nodded before leaving.

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She took a deep calming breath, but her nerves were still a wreck. She knocked on her own door and waited for him. He opened it and she couldn't help but notice his loose sweat pants and fit white wifebeater. She stepped inside and smiled, "Nice outfit," she commented.

"I didn't know you wanted me to keep the tux on," he said, half mocking, half serious.

"I do like it. It suits you; it's very Jess."

He smirked, "Very Jess?" he asked. "Define what's something Jess-like."

She walked to her room and he followed. "It's… indefinable," she tells him before turning around to choose something more comfortable than a formal dress to wear. "Where did you get the clothes? I know I don't have any men's clothes here."

He walked behind her, unzipping her dress and pulling the straps off until they fell to the floor. "I dropped by my place to get some clothes and stuff."

She nodded with her back facing him, "You're staying the night," she stated with a hint of questioning in her voice.

"I thought it was part of the invitation."

"You're always welcome here," she said, reaching for a tee shirt, but before she could grab it he reached for her hand and brought it to her side.

"Stay like this," he asked.

"Jess, I'm only in my panties."

"I don't mind," he whispered in her ear, a smirk playing on his lips.

"Well, I do," she turned around to face him. "I don't like to be naked around you. You keep looking at me," she said accusingly.

He chuckled, "Of course I do. I always look at you."

She shook her head, "No, I mean you really _look_ at me."

He grew serious and looked her in the eyes, "I always _look_ at you. Clothes on or not." He put his hands on her shoulders and turned her to him. "I'd just rather look with no cloths on tonight," he told her while his eyes roamed her body. She squirmed under his gaze and he took a step back, "But it's up to you, of course."

She sighed, giving in, "Okay. It's all about you tonight, anyway," she said and his smile grew. "Just – try not to stare, okay?"

He nodded, "Sure."

They went to the living room and he threw himself on the couch while she went to the kitchen to get a glass of water. When she came back she sat on the floor in front of him, knees bent covering most of her torso.

He smirked, "I've seen it all before. You know that, right?"

She just glared at him with a scowl, but couldn't help blushing at his words.

He shook his head, "If it makes you this uncomfortable you should just go get dressed."

"I don't want to be uncomfortable around you, I mean, it's ridiculous. Like you said, you've seen me naked… It doesn't make sense…" she rambled.

"Then, don't be," he said simply, and then he stood up and offered her a hand. She chewed on her bottom lip, staring at his hand. Finally, she put her hand over his and he pulled her up to her feet, the whole time staring her in the eyes. She knew what he was doing, proving he didn't need to look at her naked form to really _look_ at her, in that way that made her knees tremble. He was doing a damn good job in making his point.

She leaned forwards and tried to kiss him, to break the spell, but he just stepped back, not looking away for a second. He laid down on the couch and brought her with him, resting her body between his legs and her head against his chest.

"Better?"

"Not really," she told him with a shaking sigh.

"Shhh…." He smoothed her, running his hands down her sides and kissing her hair. "Relax, concentrate only on your breathing."

Slowly her breath became steadier and she seemed calmer.

"Good, now let go of everything and just pay attention to what you feel, okay?"

She nodded slightly and he started massaging her neck, her shoulders, tracing her ribs, lightly wandering down her belly to finally rest on her hipbones. He started tugging at her panties and she helped him taking them off, eyes still closed.

"You're letting me do whatever I want," he chuckled. "It must be eating you inside."

"Why do you think that?"

"Cuz you love to control everything and you can't control this."

"Jess…"

"I know you're doing this to make up for the last couple of times." She remained silent. "If you really want 'this' to go back to the way it was we'll have to talk about what happened."

"I don't want to talk about it."

"Well, I do. You're a client, you call and I come and it's fine by me. But I won't accept you being all friendly one moment and then all bitchy in the next. It makes no sense… I mean, why did you decide to become jealous out of the blue?"

She sighed with her eyes closed, "About once a month I have dinner with some friends. Last week they were talking about their… about guys like you, when Sam asked if I had called you. When I said no she started telling me all she has heard about you and how Charlotte is crazy about you… And I guess I hadn't really realized you have a different woman in your bed every night, that I'm just another one until then. Hearing her talking about you, thinking of you with other women…"

He just listened to her, his lips on her hair. It was hard to get her to be open up to him and he wouldn't spoil it by making some smart-ass comment.

"It's my job. I can't stop working so you'll feel better. If you want to stop seeing me…"

"No," she cut him off. That just didn't seem like an option to her. "Can I ask you something?"

"Okay."

"I know I have no right to ask but… Samantha said maybe she would call. Could you…not accept her as a client?"

"She is the one who gave you my card, right?"

"Yeah. I know I have no say in who you choose… but if you could just not…"

"Okay, if she calls me I'll say I'm too busy."

"Thanks," she mumbled.

He ran his hands through her hair, "No problem," he paused. "That party really tired me out, how about going to bed?"

"Sure," she smiled.

He stood up and in one swift movement got her in his arms.

"You didn't have to do that, you know?"

He smirked, "I know, but it was fun to see the surprise on your face."

He dropped her on the bed and laid down next to her, groaning. "I'm so fucking tired of all this," he confessed.

She looked down, biting her lip, and then, mustering up all courage she possessed, she leaned forward and kissed him. The kiss started chaste and shy, but rapidly grew hot and passionate. He tried to roll them over so he'd be on top of her, but she wouldn't let him, placing her hands on his shoulders and pinning him down. She started leaving wet kisses on his neck, tugging at the hem of his wifebeater and lifting it over his head. She ran her hands up and down his chest, kissing her way down, licking and nipping at times.

"What are you doing?" he asked, his voice husky.

"I've told you, tonight it's about you."

"Rory…" he sighed, "You don't have to do this."

She nodded, "I know. I want to," she told him while undoing his pants.

He closed his eyes, letting her undress him and held his breath when she took him in her hand and shyly started to lick him. He let out a moan and she felt more secure, taking him into her mouth. She started sucking him and he let out a groan, looking down to meet her blue eyes looking up at him. He ran his hand through her hair and she started working faster. Soon enough he couldn't help his moans and the effect she was having on him. He took a deep breath to find his voice and huskily commanded, "Come here," before pulling her by the shoulders, rolling them over and slamming into her. She gasped; it was all too fast and too intense. He buried his face in the crook of her neck, thrusting a couple of times into her before coming with a low groan.

He tried to steady his breathing and when he was sure he could trust his voice again he kissed her shoulder and whispered, "Sorry," truly apologetic and a bit embarrassed.

She shook her head smiling. "There is nothing to be sorry about," she said while running her fingers through his hair.

"It's just that… god, it's been the longest time since I had someone give me a blow job," he paused as if thinking. "I've never even gone down on you."

"And you're not going to," she said and his eyes narrowed at her so she added, "…tonight."

His eyes softened, his smile still in place, "Okay," he conceded. She bit her lip and he smirked, "Okay, shoot."

"What?"

He hid his face in her hair again, "You want to ask me something," he whispered.

She felt her cheeks burning up; he knew her too well. "Uhm… it's an awkward question but… doing what you do, how come you haven't had a blow job in a while, like you said?"

He pushed himself up and looked at her for a moment, then he rested his head on the valley between her breasts, "What girl actually likes to go down on a guy?" he asked rhetorically. "When I'm working… I'm there to please them, not to be pleased."

"And don't you have a girlfriend or someone?"

He laughed, "Believe me, when I'm not working I'd rather do other stuff to have fun."

She nodded, also laughing a little, then became serious again. "I don't want it to be like that between us. I want you to enjoy it, too."

"O-kay…" he said slowly.

"I want you to tell me when you don't like something or when you're not in the mood… this is not just about me."

He smiled, kissing a spot below her breast, "Okay."

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She woke up with a shift on the bed, she turned around and saw him putting his shoes on.

"Hey," she said sleepily.

"Morning," he kissed her forehead. "I have to go. I told Matt we'd go out today."

She nodded smiling, "Sure. Are you free next Friday?"

"Yeah. You want me to come over? Eight-ish?"

"Perfect," she said reaching for her purse on the floor. She got her wallet and was counting the bills when he asked, "What are you doing?"

"I have to pay you," she said the obvious.

He took a bag she hadn't noticed he had brought last night, probably with his change of clothes, and rested a knee on the bed to support his weight as he kissed her. "No way. It just made us even." He got the wallet from her hand and tossed it aside. "Have a good day" and "I'll see you Friday" were the last words she heard before he closed the door of her apartment and she fell back asleep.


	10. The Brother

Title: Sex or Love

Author: Bru Cardoso

Summary: Rory is a successful businesswoman in her mid-twenties with no time - or skill - for relationships. Jess is a good looking guy who is willing to spend a night pleasing a woman as long as she pays for it. What happens when they meet? AU Lit

Disclaimer: Don't own the characters; do own the plot. You know the drill.

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**A/N:** First I have to apologize. A lot has been going on in my life and I couldn't update faster. I also have to thank everyone who haven't given up on me and keep reading my stuff as well as everyone who reviewed.

**CharliLee:** Thank you sooo much for the reviews! And you're right, in a way I know them – even though there is no hooker/client relationship in real life; a lot of this is me.

**June:** Thank God, I'm not dead. As far as I know I don't have cancer, I don't plan on jumping off a cliff and well, anyone can get hit by a car, but hopefully I won't. 'Sex or Love' is far from done, don't worry; and I don't compare my stories. I know some are good and some are painful to read, but they are all me and that's why I work on many stories at the same time. But I'll try to update more frequently.

**Lee**, **Michella77**, **pam** **halliwell**, **maymayisarjlovr**, **Emilee** **Carter**: Thank you!

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**Chap 10**

He walked the short distance from the corridor to her door, knocked twice and waited. He waited a couple of minutes but no one answered. She usually didn't take this long and he was starting to wonder if she had forgotten of their 'date'. Finally she opened the door, hair disheveled and a bit out of breath.

"Oh, hey," she said, obviously surprised to see him there.

"Hi. Uhm… you told me to come over tonight around eight, so…" he said, feeling the need to explain his presence there.

She looked inside her apartment apprehensive, in the direction of the study across from her room. "Oh, yeah. God, I forgot. I'm so sorry," she told him, biting her lip nervously.

He studied her for a moment. "If you have some company, it's okay. I mean, you knew you could always date whomever you wanted… I just didn't know, I mean, I never thought…"

"Jess, it's not like that…"

"No, it's okay. Really. You're free to do whatever you want and be with whomever you want… I should just go…."

"No, let me explain!" she pleaded but he had already turned away and was walking down the corridor.

"You don't have to explain yourself to me. It's okay, really. I don't want to intrude; just go back to your date."

"Jess…" she started but a small voice interrupted her.

"Rory, are you coming back?"

Jess stopped in his track and turned around to find a boy around four next to Rory, looking up at her. He had the same blue eyes and dark hair she had.

"Yeah, I'm going back in a moment Will. Why don't you go back and start the movie?"

The little boy nodded but then he noticed Jess, "Who is he?"

Rory shifted her weight from a foot to another, "Uhm… Will, this is my friend Jess."

"Hi Jess," the little boy greeted with a wave. "Are you going to watch the movie with us?"

Jess shook his head slightly with a small smile.

"Why?" he asked before turning to Rory. "Don't you want him to watch the movie with us, Rory?" he looked disappointed at Rory.

She smiled at Will, "Sure I want him to join us." She looked up at Jess with a nervous smile, "Do you want to stay and watch the movie?"

Jess shrugged, "If you're sure it's okay."

She nodded and Will exclaimed, "Yeah!", excited with the new company.

"Okay Will, why don't you go and start the movie? We will be there in a minute."

"Okay," the boy said, running to the study room.

"Huh, I didn't know you had a son," Jess said more surprised than he already looked.

Rory shook her head laughing lightly, "Oh, no. He is not my son; he's my baby brother. My mom and step-father went on a 'honeymoon weekend' and asked me to take care of him."

"Ah," Jess sighed, not sure why he felt a bit relieved. For a second he had felt like he didn't know anything at all about her and for some reason that scared him. "So, you sure about me staying?"

"Yeah, sure, unless you don't want you. I mean, you don't have to…"

"No, it's okay. I'd like that," he said stepping into the apartment and taking off his jacket. He went to the study room to find Will slouched on the couch with huge amounts of junkie food around him.

"So, what film are we watching?" he asked the little boy while sitting by his side.

"Well, Rory said I could choose whatever movie I wanted, so I thought we could start with "Brother Bear" and then watch "Ice Age I and II".

Jess smirked. "It sounds you have it all figured out."

The boy smiled and nodded proud of himself, "Yeah, and I also sorted all junkie food we will need. Here is the chocolate kind, over there are the chips, and in this side we have the sugared kind."

Rory watched the scene from the doorway, "Mom would be proud of you."

"Yeah, only one thing missing." He looked at his older sister with puppy eyes, "Rory, can I have a cup of coffee."

She giggled, "What mom would say?"

"That I'm a true Gilmore and that she is proud," he said grinning.

"And Luke?"

"That I'm too young and I can't drink coffee," he said with a scowl.

"And what you usually do then?"

"Wait until dad leaves to have coffee with mommy," he said obviously.

Jess looked baffled and amused at the same time. Rory on the other hand, seemed to be expecting those answers.

"Tell you what, you can have one cup tonight and tomorrow I'll talk to mom about how many cups you can have a day."

He pouted giving her the bambi eyes but she only giggled. "Don't even try that with me! I taught you that!"

He stuck his tongue at his older sister and after a cup of coffee they started watching the movie, but Jess was paying more attention to the interaction between brother and sister than to what was happening on the screen.

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When the credits started to roll Jess looked to his side to see a smiling Rory and a sleeping Will. He smirked, Well, I can't say I have ever had a night like this… It surely was interesting."

She turned to him smiling and blushed. "Yeah… Well, thank you for staying. Will had a great time. I did, too."

"Well, I should go…" he trailed off.

She bit her lip and shyly cut him off, "Unless you want to stay."

"What about Will?"

"He likes you; he won't mind you staying."

"You sure… I don't want to mess up with his mind."

"You won't; trust me."

"Okay then," he stood up and she followed his lead.

"Would you mind carrying him to his bed?"

Jess shook his head and took the boy into his arms, following Rory to a small room he hadn't noticed. The room was simple, painted in sky-blue with a small bed and a drawer in a corner and many toys scattered around. He put the boy on the bed and Rory tucked him in, like a mother would.

They've left the room and as soon as Rory closed the door he pushed her against the wall, kissing her. She was surprised in the beginning and it took her a moment to respond, wrapping her arms against his neck.

When he broke the kiss, he rested his forehead against her shoulder, "I've been waiting the whole night to do this?" he told her and she could only beam.

They walked to her room and he looked down at her, "Should I leave the door open?"

"Nah, Will is a big boy, he doesn't come to my room in the middle of the night anymore."

He closed the door and locked it. When he turned around he was surprised to see that Rory had started a teasingly slow strip. He sat on the bed, carefully watching her and she glared at him, "Liking the show?" she mocked.

He just nodded watching her every move.

"I guess I should be the one charging then?"

He only smirked like the cat that ate the canary and raised an eyebrow at her comment, which in turn made her blush. She stripped down to her panties and walked up to him, standing between his legs, "You're still fully clothed," she pointed out.

He looked up at her with a bittersweet smile and tired eyes.

"What's wrong?"

"Tough day."

"What happened?"

He shrugged, looking ahead, "You know, this and that."

She watched him for a moment, "Lunch client?" she questioned.

He rested his forehead on her belly sighing and kissed it as answer. She closed her eyes and ran her fingers through his hair. He looked up and she locked eyes with him, "You tired?" she asked.

He shrugged, not wanting to tell her how tired he really was. She knew about the other women, but she didn't have to hear about it from his lips.

She knelt in front of him and kissed the corner of his mouth before licking it and really kissing him. After a few moments she pushed away holding the sides of his head with both hands and looked into his weary eyes. "You're not in the mood for this," she stated.

"Rory… tonight… I'm yours. You don't have to worry about me."

She looked down smiling sadly and shook her head, "I've told you, I don't want this to be only about me. If you're not in the mood, then we don't do anything."

He raised his eyebrow, "Then what?"

She laid down bringing him down with her and places her head over his shoulder, whispering in his ear, "Then, we lie here, and we sleep. And if we want we can kiss and make out and maybe more. Or not. It's all about what _we _want. Not just me."

He grinned, finally believing her and nuzzled her neck, rolling them over and getting on top of her. He kissed his way down from her to her breasts, sucking them while she moaned. His hands traveled down and tugged at her panties until she let him take them off of her. He attacked her mouth again, distracting her while his hands spread her legs and he pushed a finger into her. She arched her back and he smirked proud of himself and the effects he could cause on her. As her moans got a louder, but not enough to wake up Will, he pushed a second finger in. He rubbed all her sensitive spots and kissed her senseless until she lost all control, shaking, groaning and calling his name; all at the same time.

When her trance was fading he held her by her sides, hiding his face on the crook of her neck. Her breathing was labored, there was a grin on her face and a buzz in her ears.

"That was…" she started.

"Good?" he offered.

She looked down at him, blushing slightly, "Good is a word to define it, yeah."

He smiled and kissed her neck absentmindedly.

"You know you didn't have to… right?"

"Stop it," he laughed. "I know that but I wanted to, okay?"

She bit her lip to keep from smiling, "Okay then," she paused. "Now, how about we get you out of these clothes?"

He let her undress him down to his boxers and before he could notice it she had taken control, pulling her body half on top of him and grinding her hips against his.

He groaned and threw his head back, "Okay, you said yourself that I was tired, so what are you trying to do? Kill me?"

She smirked in a way he recognized as his own, "Now, where would be the fun in that?"

He shook his head and kissed her, "I think it's time we get some sleep."

She nodded and turned around to lie besides him, barely touching his arm, "Good night, Jess."

He pulled her back against his chest, fitting her body into his and his lips brushed against her nape, "Good night, Rory."

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"Rory? Rory? Rory!" She heard someone calling her name and a pounding from far away. At first she thought it was a dream, but when she recognized the voice she opened her eyes.

"Will?" she asked in a voice full of sleep.

"Rory? Your door is locked!" he told her as if she didn't know.

She looked at her side, where Jess was sleeping on his belly and bit her lip. "Hold on," she called out.

Se stood up and put on an oversized tee that went down to her knees and a pair of panties. She carefully opened the door, careful so he wouldn't see inside.

"Hey baby, how did you sleep?"

"Good. Why was your door locked?"

"Will…" she tried to start, but before she could go on he ran inside the room, heading to the bed as he was used to do when he slept over at Rory's.

"Will, no!" she tried to stop him but it was too late.

He jumped on the bed waking up Jess with a startle as Will sat down surprised.

"You slept on Rory's bed?"

Jess looked from the boy to Rory and back again, not knowing what to say. Rory just shrugged also lost, so he decided to go with the truth and said a quiet, "Yeah."

The small boy frowned, "Why? Are you scared of the dark?"

Jess couldn't help but smirk, "Not exactly. It was late so Rory invited me to stay."

Will nodded silently.

"Do you mind?" Jess asked truly concerned.

The boy tilted his head to the side, "Can you make breakfast?"

Jess smirked at the question and looked up at Rory, "Yeah, I can cook. Do you want to help me in the kitchen?"

His big blue eyes lit up and he jumped again, "Can I really?"

"Yeah, let's go."

The boy ran to the kitchen while Jess slowly stood up, stretched and put on a pair of sweat pants and a white wife beater he had left in her place from their last time together. He walked up to Rory and wrapped his arms around her waist while kissing her, "Good morning."

She just smiled, watching the two boys walking down to the kitchen.

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"Rory! Rory! What are we going to do today?" Will asked excitedly while having his breakfast.

She smiled adoringly at her little brother, "Well baby, I was thinking we could go to the park and then to that book store that you love. Maybe go to the movies if we have time."

"Do you like parks Jess?" Will asked while chewing on his pancakes.

"Baby," Rory cut in, "Jess isn't going with us.

Will tilted his head and gave Rory his puppy eyes, "He won't? Why?"

"Will, Jess has other things to do. He was being nice staying with us last night but we can't ask him to just cancel his agenda and spend the day with us," she told him slowly, trying to make him understand.

"What if I want to?" Jess questioned, surprising her.

"Yeah, what if he wants to?" Will repeated petulantly.

Rory looked into Jess' eyes, "Then you're more than welcomed to join us."

"Okay then. How about you go help Will change while I wash the dishes?"

"Great!" Will shouted and ran to his room. Rory also stood up and followed her brother, but not before kissing Jess and murmuring a 'thank you'.

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The were arriving at Rory's apartment from their visit to the park and the book store when Will sat on the living room couch with a thoughtful expression. He silently observed Jess for a moment, then asked, "Are you Rory's lobster?" referring to a Friends episode Lorelai loved to joke about.

"What?" Jess asked, truly confused.

"No!" Rory said at the same time.

Will giggled at the scene, but then frowned, " Then what is he?"

"He is… a friend."

"A friend?" Will repeated in deep thoughts. "A friend like Logan?"

Rory sighed, "No, not a friend like Logan, baby."

Jess looked at her questioning but she simply looked away.

"But," Will started again, "Jess slept in your bed. Logan used to sleep in your bed."

Jess' eyes started to burn roles on Rory's back, but she refused to look at him. She looked down at Will instead and held his hands in her to keep his attention, "Will, Logan was a different kind of friend. I know he used to sleep in my bed just like Jess did last night, but that's all. Jess is completely different from Logan."

The small boy nodded, "Good, 'cause mom says she hated that freaking bastard. What's a freaking bastard, Rory?"

She sighed, cursing her mother for ever saying something like that in front of Will and squirmed, knowing Jess' gaze was still on her.

"Uhm… I'm not sure what that means, baby. How about we wait until mom comes back and then you ask her?" she suggested, praying he would agree.

"Okay," he shrugged and she sighed in relief.

"Hey Will, why don't you go read hat book we bought you and then we tuck you in?" Jess asked.

"Okay," the boy said, jumping down from the couch and walking to his room.

Jess looked at her and said only one word, "Logan?"

"I thought you didn't talk to your clients about their personal lives. Should I feel especial now?" she asked cynically.

He shook his head disappointed, "I just thought you could tell me this one thing about your life since I don't know anything about you and you know even about my childhood problems. Guess I was wrong." He turned around and went to her room, slamming the door behind him.

She sat on the couch and put her head in her hands, sighing as if the weight of the world was in her shoulders.

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About an hour later she silently slipped into her room. He laid on his side of the bed ignoring her, so she sat on her side with her to back facing him.

"In my second year in Yale I met Logan. He was an arrogant, cocky, rich playboy. I still don't know how but I fell for him. Hard. My major back then was journalism and after a while his father got me an internship in one of his newspapers. When it was just about to finish he told me I didn't have it in me to be a journalist and that I should quit. So I did. I quit Yale and stole a yacht with Logan; stupid, I know. My mom bailed me out of jail but she didn't want me to drop out of Yale, so we've ended up having this huge fight and I went to live with my grandparents' pool house. My life revolved only in going to DAR meetings, doing community work – my sentence for the yacht fiasco, and of course, Logan. After a while I became the perfect trophy wife without a life of my own, so Logan did what he was supposed to do; he proposed."

She paused with tears in her eyes. "I was going to marry him! I was going to fuck marry him!" She paused again, swallowing her tears. "A couple of months before our wedding his sister got married, and of course, I was one among dozens of maids of honor. While we were getting ready they started talking about the guys attending the wedding with whom they had slept with and then they started talking about Logan."

Her voice was bitter, cold and distant while she continued with the story, "Every single one of them had slept with him while we were dating. He tried to convince me he was just trying to be sure that I was the right one, that I had to understand and accept it like a good wife would. I guess it was just then I realized what I had gotten myself into."

She shook her head and took a shaky breath, "After that I left him, made up with my mom and got into Harvard's business school." She turned her head around and finally looked at him for the first time since she entered the room, "And now, here I am."

Jess crossed the bed and knelt just behind her, hugging her from behind. "It's over," he whispered into her ear.

"I know, I know."

"You don't have to ever see him again."

"Yeah, just his picture on the paper every now and then." At Jess' questioning look she added, "His name is Logan Huntzberger."

"As in the Huntzberger papers?" he asked shocked.

She nodded.

"Wow! You surely know how to pick them!" he commented and she laughed.

"I'm sorry about before."

He nodded, "It's okay. You're right, you're the client-"

She shook her head vehemently. "It's not okay; I wasn't fair. I Know I'm just another client but you're not just another guy that gets me into bed… you know there is no one else… That's not the point. What I mean is that I had no right to say that and I appreciate you sharing some of your stuff with me. I'm just not used to sharing things about my life with anyone; but I'll try," she told him hopeful he would understand. And he did.

He didn't bother to comment on the 'just another client' thing, thinking it was better to let it slip this time – for both their sakes. He kissed her mouth sweetly, "I'll tuck Will in and I'll be back in a minute, okay?"

She nodded and smiled dumbly as he left the room, watching his retreating back.


	11. The Park

**A/N: **Thank you to **Charli Lee **for the beta.

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**Chap 11**

She sighed in her slumber, slowly waking up. Something was odd; she just couldn't put her finger on it. Blinking a couple of times, she tried to turn around in bed only to collide with something strong and warm. Carefully, she turned her head to see a smirking Jess kissing her shoulder blade.

Rory yawned contently, "What time is it?"

Leaving feather light kisses up to her neck, he mumbled, "Around nine."

She giggled, "God, I haven't slept this much since ever. At the very least since college."

He frowned and shook his head, "Sometimes I think you should take some vacation from yourself." He paused and kissed her neck before continuing, "What time does Will usually wake up?"

"He was really tired after going to the movies and the bookstore yesterday…" she said with a broken voice, trying to ignore the feeling of his tongue tracing the vein of her neck and concentrate on his question, "I think it's safe to say he'll sleep at least until noon."

He smirked against her skin, "Good, cuz I kind of woke you up for a reason…" he said before pressing his erection against her thigh.

She half laughed, half moaned.

"What's so funny?" he murmured into her hair.

"I thought I was the one looking for sex in this…thing," and before he had the chance to answer she pulled him against her and kissed him hard.

He moved on top of her, pinning her against the bed, kissing his way down to her breasts he worked on her body as the professional he was. She heard him whisper, "Try not to make too much noise," and before she could understand what was happening he was kissing his way down her body. As he kissed her thighs and held her legs apart, working his lips on her, the only rational thought she could have was to do what he had suggested and try to be quiet. She took a pillow and buried her face on it, trying to muffle her moans and groans. But as he drove her closer and closer to the edge she couldn't suppress all the noise she was making. As she came he moved up and kissed her while entering her with a slow thrust. As the waves from her orgasm faded, he stared picking a pace, thrusting faster and harder until she came again, this time with him.

Rory closed her eyes and tried to catch her breath in vain, her heart racing furiously. Jess didn't move from his position on top of her, too spent to do absolutely anything. For a few minutes they just stayed there, their bodies sweaty, their breathing labored.

He looked down at her with a smirk, finally answering her comment, "You are the one looking for sex. But it looked like you forgot, so I just thought I would remind you."

She grinned, "Yeah, sure, that's why you woke me up."

He nodded, "Yup, now let's go back to sleep. I'm tired." He said already yawning.

She giggled and turned to her side bringing the sheets with her. He wasn't the kind of guy who likes to cuddle even though he often did it out of obligation and she knew it, so she let him be. However, he felt comfortable with her, so he just did what he felt like doing. He lied on his belly and threw an arm loosely around her, hiding his face in her hair. Not hugging her but keeping her close.

* * *

Will finished eating his burger and asked excitedly, "What are we going to do now?"

Rory giggled and ruffled his hair, "What do you want to do?"

The little boy looked out of the window trying to think of something. "Jess, do you like parks?" he asked hopeful.

"Yeah, of course," he smiled down at the boy, before looking at Rory to know if it's okay.

She nodded and dropped a few bills on the table, "Let's go, I know a park you'll love Will."

Will jumped up and ran to the door with a mad grin, followed by the adults.

"You didn't have to pay for my lunch," Jess told Rory as they left the diner and walked down the street.

"It's no trouble," she shrugged and a few minutes later they arrive at a cozy empty park with a small playground.

"Wow, that's so cool, Rory!" Will almost screamed before running to the swings.

Jess turned to her, "Yeah, that's so cool, Rory," he mocked playfully. She pushed him away laughing.

"I don't what why you're mocking. You're the one who said you liked parks."

He smirked and pulled her arm pouting, "But I do like parks."

She rolled he eyes faking frustration but couldn't help the smirk that appeared on her face. He kissed her softly but after a moment she pulled away, walking quickly towards Will and calling, "Will, be careful or you'll fall off the swing!"

Jess smiled at the scene glad to see this caring side of her. He looked around, onto the streets on the lazy Sunday afternoon with a calm expression and then frowned. An incredibly pretty girl with straight brown hair and green eyes was walking towards him on her obviously expensive high heels.

"Jess, darling, I thought you were busy this whole week," she exclaimed in a high-pitched voice as she grabbed his arm.

His face suddenly became blank. "Client called it off on the last minute."

A feline smile crossed her face, "So, you're free now?" she concluded.

He looked at the swings where Rory was playing with Will while watching him. He thought she looked a little sad, maybe disappointed; but she was just another client so he must be imagining things.

"Jess?" the girl in front of him purred.

"I'm sorry, I've already made plans."

The girl looked pointedly at Rory, "Really?"

He sighed frustrated, knowing he will have to leave the park for at least a few minutes in order to keep Rory and Will away from any messes. "Yeah, actually I'm getting late. I should go."

"Oh, okay," she said disappointed she wouldn't get her chance with him that night. "I'll call you when I get back to New York?"

He shrugged not caring either way, "Okay."

They both left the park and down the street until parting ways. He went into a Starbucks while she headed for the subway. He waited in line wondering why his client's presence had upset him so much. It's not like Rory had caught him red handed, in some kind of lie. She knew what his job was; he worked for her, for crying out loud! But for some reason it felt different with her. It wasn't a sacrifice to spend time with her. And he thought if they had met in some other way maybe they could have had a friendship of sorts, but now it just seemed not likely. She was needy in more ways than one, which made their 'relationship' very convenient for her, and surprisingly they got along, but that was it. She was his client; she was a CEO in a big company who had studied at Harvard and earned more than he could imagine. He sighed. She just needed him for one thing and one thing only, and that was his work.

After a few minutes he went back to the park with a bag of pastries in one and a tray with coffee on the other. When he stepped into the park again he found Rory kneeling in front of Will talking to the little boy. As he walked in their direction he could hear Rory saying things like 'he wanted to stay but he had to go' and 'you'll see him again one of these days' while the boy kept his head down.

He shook his head, "Hey Will, guess what I brought you?"

The boy looked up and ran to Jess with wide eyes, "Jess! I knew you didn't left! Rory said you had to go but I knew you wouldn't!"

He looked at Rory before looking at Will with a smile, "Of course I wouldn't! And guess what I brought you?"

"Coffee!!!" The boy said jumping before Jess handed him one of the 'to go' cups. He sipped the liquid and made a face, "This is not coffee!"

Jess chuckled, "It is a cappuccino. Black coffee is too strong."

Will glared at him but went back to the swing to drink his cappuccino.

Jess glanced coldly at Rory before handing her a cup of coffee, "You shouldn't have told him I had simply left."

"You left with that girl, what was I supposed to think?" she questioned.

"That I was trying to get her out of here for both your and Will's sake?" he asked bitterly.

Rory looked away, "Client?"

He nodded.

"I don't know why I even asked," she said shaking her head.

He just rolled his eyes, "Look, she left, that's all that matters, right?"

Suddenly her blue eyes are staring into his, "What did she want?"

He sighed, accepting apparently it wasn't that simple. "She wanted to see me tonight."

"Shouldn't her have booked you 48 hours ago?" she asked with venom.

He stared coldly, "She tried, I told her I was busy the whole week. When she saw me she thought I could make some time for her."

Rory bit her lip not believing the words that were about to leave her mouth, "Do you really charge her?"

He shrugged, "She's a client."

"She looks like a model," answer back.

"She _is _a model," he corrected.

Rory laughed bitterly, "Oh, great!"

Just then he noticed her mascara wasn't as perfect as it was when they left her place an hour ago. It looked like she had spilled a tear or two and he wondered if it had really happened or it was just his imagination.

"Look, I'm here, so what's the problem?"

She turned slowly to him, looking him in the eye. "Why are you here?" she asked, honestly wanting to know the answer.

He sighed, "Because you invited me."

She looked down, "Is it because I invited you or because I'm a client?"

He shook his head, "Think what you want," he told her before walking towards Will. She watched from far away as he told the boy they had to leave and helped him into his coat.

* * *

"What time are we going to Stars Hollow, Rory?"

"I'm not going to Stars Hollow, hon. Mom is coming over to pick you up in about an hour."

"Oh, I thought since I had come to visit you, you would go visit us."

"I'll go to Stars Hollow some time soon, okay?"

Will nodded and yawned.

"Do you want to go watch some cartoons and take a nap?"

He nodded rubbing his eyes.

"Okay, then go say goodbye to Jess."

Will looked up at Jess and extended his hand, "It was nice meeting you," he said trying to look grown up.

Jess knelt down in front of him and shook his hand. "It was nice meeting you, too."

"Am I going to see you again?"

"I hope so."

"You could go to Stars Hollow with Rory!" he suggested.

Jess looked up at Rory, "We'll see about that."

Will smiled and waved before running to the other room.

"So…" Rory started but trailed off not knowing what to say.

"I guess I should be going. I'm not the kind of guy who meets the mother."

"Right," she nodded getting the wallet out of her purse and counting some bills.

He looked at her in disbelief, "What are you doing?"

"I made you spent a whole weekend with me, cancel your rendezvous with your other clients… I have to pay you."

He groaned, "You never get it right, do you?"

"Get what right? I'm just another client, aren't I?"

He bit his tongue since she _was_ just another client. He just sighed and looked away.

"How much do I owe you?" she asked.

"$250."

"That's your starting price. You spent two whole days with me."

"You want to give me more money than I'm charging?" he looked at her faking incredibility.

"No, it's just… doesn't this money make a difference in your life?"

He chuckled. "Don't worry; I'll manage without a couple hundred bucks. I'll just overcharge someone else," he joked - or so she hoped.

He looked down awkwardly as she started counting the bills silently before folding them and handing him. He shoved the money into his pocket, "Thanks."

She shook her head, "No problem."

"Call me if you want to schedule something," he said kissing her cheek.

She nodded silently and opened the door for him.

Half an hour later he was in a cab, parked in front of his building. When he got his payment to pay the cab there were $600 instead of $250.


	12. The Deal

**A/N:** Okay, I know I took awfully long but life is crazy and I had very little free time. _**Huge**_ thanks to **Charli Lee (Sue)** for the beta and for the help in this chap. It wouldn't be half as good without her. Also, I named all the chapters after lines of Legião Urbana's songs. If anyone understands Portuguese I totally recommend them.

And please, drop a line and let me know what you think; as always anything true goes.

* * *

**Chap 12**

Rory sat by her desk during her lunchtime flipping though a magazine, looking at the latest fashion when her cell rang.

"Hello?" she answered the phone not checking the ID.

"Hon, have I already thanked you for taking care of Will last weekend?"

Rory rolled her eyes, "Yes, mom. And please, don't get into details over why you're so thankful."

"Okay, I won't. But don't you have anything you want to tell me?"

Rory stopped reading for a moment and narrowed her eyebrows even though her mother couldn't see, "No."

"Really? Not even about some handsome dark-haired guy named Jess who slept in your room?" Lorelai questioned with the excitement of a teenager wanting to listen to latest gossip.

Rory closed her eyes and hit her head on her desk. "If I say 'no' will you leave me alone?"

"Oh, come on, you know better than to ask stuff like that."

Rory smiled giving in, "Well, there isn't much to tell, really. His name is Jess, he's around my age, a couple of inches taller, dark hair…"

"Is he hot?"

"Mom!"

"Well, it is a valid question."

Rory rolled her eyes, "Yes, he is hot, mom."

"What does he do for a living? And please don't tell me he is a boring and workaholic CEO."

Rory cringed, "No… he kind of rent… things."

"Things? What kind of things?"

"Just… things that people need for a short amount of time."

"Okay. And when am I gonna meet him? Will won't stop talking about him."

Rory sighed, "Mom, Jess and I, we aren't serious. I don't know if this is going anywhere," she told her mother even though the words tasted bitter on her tongue.

"I know, I know. I don't expect you to marry him and have his kids. But since you two spend whole weekends together I thought it wouldn't be such a big deal for me to meet him."

"Tell you what; if things get serious I'll make sure you two meet, okay?"

"If there is no other choice…"

Rory smiled and went back to flipping through the magazine, "So, what did Will tell you about Jess?"

"I don't know what Jess did, but he became Will's hero! Will is always asking when Jess is coming to visit us."

Rory listened to Lorelai's rambling about Will while flipping through the pages until she saw a picture of the girl from the park. She read the title of the article and learnt she was the girl in cover and that the main interview was about her – which included an exclusive photo shoot. Rory finally snapped out of her trance when Lorelai started calling her name.

"Sorry mom. I have to go now. I'll call you later."

"Oh, okay. But don't forget to call!"

Rory smiled, "Sure. Tonight, as soon as I get home."

"Good, then I'll let you go. Bye sweets. Take care."

Rory closed her cell and focused her attention on the article in front of her. Now that she had a better look she could see how gorgeous the model really was. Her porcelain skin matched her green eyes perfectly. She was tall and extremely thin, like pretty much every model. In some pictures she looked innocent and fresh and in other she was wearing just some fancy lingerie and doing some sexy poses. And that's when Rory realized how pathetic she must look to Jess. She looked at the pictures on the next pages feeling more and more ridiculous as she saw how beautiful this girl was.

Finally, she sighed and bit her lip. She had to read the interview. In the beginning she didn't find anything interesting. The model just kept repeating herself about how exhausting her life was, traveling around the world all the time, going on a constant diet, the pressure of the industry…

Rory was starting to think there wouldn't be anything relevant on the interview until she read a question the interviewer made about her love life. Rory held her breath as she read the model saying she had no time to date, especially since she was never at the same place for long. But there was this "special friend" she had in New York with whom she had hoped to have a real relationship, however he had made it perfectly clear that they couldn't have anything serious. She ended the article saying they remained "friends" and that they always saw each other when she was in New York.

Rory closed the magazine and sighed. She shook her head and repeated to herself the hardest question to answer, "Why do I care?"

* * *

Rory stared at the mirror analyzing her image. It wasn't that she was fat but she could never be as slim as the model they've met in the park. It wasn't that she was ugly, but she could never be as gorgeous as Terry, who they met at the diner. She had already embarrassed herself and made clear to him she was a boring workaholic with no life of her own. And she could only imagine how much fun his other clients must be. It's true that there were some workaholics - as he had told her - but just like Terry, there were also the ones who were just wives with too much free time and no hobbies. And those had to be at least a little more interesting.

She bit her lip; she would never be able to take the comparison he must do between her and his other clients, about how ridiculous she must be to him. Then she sighed and closed her eyes as she realized there was another field in which he certainly compares his clients - including her - and it turned her stomach upside down just to think about it. He was experienced, a professional, who slept with a different woman every night. And she was dorky and clumsy, and even though she was no virgin, she was far from being as experienced and confident as he was.

She licked her blood-red lips and pulled an oversized sweatshirt over her head just before going to answer the door.

"Hey," Jess greeted as he stepped inside and pecked her on the lips.

She quickly pulled away, "Hi."

He looked at her puzzled but thought it was better just to let it go. "So, what are you in the mood for tonight?"

She looked away, "Hum... I thought maybe we could just watch a movie or something, if you don't mind."

She was too uncomfortable with herself to want him touching her. The idea that he would be comparing her and she would be the lowest on his list was a dread to her.

He shrugged not really understanding what was happening, "Okay... What do you have in mind? Anything dirty?" he joked.

She blushed furiously even though she was a grown woman and he smirked. "There are some movies at the study - no porn as you so nicely suggested - but you can choose."

He smiled, "So, what are we waiting for?"

"You go ahead, I'm just gonna get some popcorn and soda in the kitchen."

When Rory stepped into the study 'Almost Famous' was on the TV and Jess was shirtless lying on the couch. She swallowed the lump in her throat she got at his sight and handed him the bowl of popcorn before going to sit on the chair next to the couch.

He chuckled. "I thought you were going to sit with me to watch the movie," he commented with a bit of sarcasm.

She stood up and moved to the couch, "Right, I just didn't want to bother you. You seemed so comfortable laying here that I didn't want to take your space."

He pulled her against him and kissed her hair. "Nonsense," he said before pushing play and letting the movie start.

About an hour into the movie he started to pull her closer and closer until she was on his lap. Then he started absentmindedly to place kisses on her neck and shoulder. She didn't say a word of protest or encouragement; it was almost as if he wasn't doing anything. Almost. But soon enough she could feel his budge against her upper thigh and even though she tried her best, she couldn't ignore it.

She cleared her throat and moved slightly away from him, but just then he held her by the waist and paused the movie.

He turned her around so he could face her and started kissing her slowly, to which she hesitantly responded. He sent her a crooked smirk and kissed the corner of her mouth, "Are you okay?"

She nodded silently avoiding his eyes.

"Bad day at work?" he questioned as his hands wandered under her sweatshirt, slowly making their way up to her breasts.

She shivered and shook her head before placing her hands over his stopping him.

He sighed letting his arms fall by his side and looked at the space between them, "Is it something I did?"

She bit her lip and shook her head.

"Rory, you have barely said a word to me since I got here. Do you want me to leave?"

She looked up at him with wide eyes, as a deer caught in the headlights. "I don't know," she said in a weak voice.

He shook his head and stood up, "Well, I guess that answers my question." He grabbed his wifebeater, put it on and was about to leave the room when he heard his name. It sounded odd, as if she was apprehensive for some reason.

He looked at her broken form and wondered how such an independent successful woman managed to always look so broken and lost out of working hours.

He walked back to the couch and sat besides her, "Is it about last weekend?"

She shrugged and just then he stopped trying to hide his frustration. "Look, I'm trying to get what's happening here, but it's a two way street and I won't keep throwing punches on water."

"It's stupid, really. Just let's go back to the movie," she said reaching for the control and pushing play again.

He observed her for a couple of minutes before settling himself behind her and started working on her neck with all his ability. She couldn't understand how kisses and nips could affect her so much, but they did. He focused his attention on the spots he knew would drive her crazy instead of in the film that was playing on the TV. Sure enough, after a few minutes he could see her shiver. That was part of his work, pay attention to every reaction he got from his clients and file them in his mind; learn what they liked, what they disliked and what drove them crazy. Rory was losing herself in his ministrations when she felt his hands on her stomach. Suddenly, she jumped a little from his touch, trying to get away.

"Rory?" he asked softly.

She shakily looked back at him, blinking twice, "What?"

"What has gotten into you?"

"Nothing," she lied, trying to calm her erratic breathing. "It's just... I don't think I'm in the mood for that."

"Bullshit," he told her, tired of playing games and ignoring her reactions as she wished. "I can read your body just like a book. Now, what's really going on?"

She rolled her eyes trying to come up with some excuse. "Look, don't worry. I'll still pay you just like we agreed. I just don't want you to... you know..." she finished with what was barely a whisper, "touch me."

"What? You just found out you regret this deal?"

"No, no. I just..." she trailed off not knowing what to say.

"If you're scared that I have something, you don't have to be. I'm careful-"

"It's not that, Jess," she interrupted as she saw how upset and offended he looked at the idea of her thinking something like that about him. And she really never had thought about it. He seemed to appreciate life more than enough to take good care of himself. She knew for a fact that he had always been safe with her, and she would bet he was just as safe with every other client.

"Really, I'm safe with every single fucking client. I also get my blood checked once every two months just to be totally sure. I'd never put anyone in risk-"

"Jess, it's not you; it's me," she told him lamely.

He laughed bitterly, "God, somehow that sounds very cliché."

She looked down, "It's true, okay?"

"Why don't you want me touching you?"

"Don't make it hard on me," she pleaded desperately, but he wasn't about to give up looking for answers.

She sighed tiredly, knowing he wasn't going to let it go and she would have to tell him sooner or later. She put a hand to her head; the sooner the better, right?

"I feel like I'm not good enough," she whispered.

"What are you talking about?"

She stood up, getting agitated and anxious about what she was going to say. "Today I was flipping through a magazine and the cover girl was that model you bumped into on the park. There was a photo shoot of her inside... she's gorgeous. Really. Her body has all the right curves and her face is so... beautiful. I mean, she is a model for God's sake! And that other woman we met at the restaurant, Terry, she is so pretty. She looks like she has just stepped out of a Victoria's Secret catalogue; angel's face with devil's body. It's like she's unreachable; I can't even try to compare myself to her. Even Tina, that woman from the party; she may be a bitch, but it's undeniable that she looks like a Barbie doll," she rambled.

He smirked trying not to show his amusement. "Is it really what this is about? About you being insecure?"

She blushed and swallowed hard, "You know, you could be nice enough to try not to laugh."

He chuckled anyway and stood up as well, "Sorry. It just doesn't make much sense to me. You're mad cuz my clients are good looking."

She crossed her arms getting angry at him for enjoying her embarrassment so much, "What exactly are you saying?"

And suddenly he realized, "You're jealous."

"No, I'm not," she said like a stubborn five year old.

He grew sober and nodded, "Yes, you are. You said you couldn't even try to compare yourself to them."

Rory looked down, "I might be a little insecure, but I'm not _jealous_ of them."

"So you wouldn't mind if I talked about them, right? After all, they don't matter to you. Well, I know I said I hated Terry but it's kind of hard not to notice her-"

"Stop!" she screamed. "Stop, okay?" her face was red and her breathing was labored as a single tear slipped down her cheek. She quickly swiped it away, avoiding eye contact. He finally took pity on her, feeling guilty for making her feel that way. He got closer to her, wrapping his arms around her. She resisted and tried to get out of his embrace but ended up giving in and letting him hold her.

"I don't know what you want me to say."

She bit her lip, "Do you compare _us_?"

He was silent for a moment, "It's not that I compare you, really, but it's kind of an unconscious thing. Like, if I ask you who works harder and who has more potential in your office; you just know the answer but it's not that you stopped to think about it. But don't worry, there are no lists and I don't make gossips or talk about my clients to anyone." He sat back on the couch bringing her with him to sit on his lap, making it more comfortable for him to hug her as she rested her head against his chest with her eyes closed.

"Who is your best... client in bed?"

"Rory..." he sighed and ran a hand through her hair. She looked up at him so he continued, "I think you're asking the wrong question."

"And what's the right question?" she asked painfully.

"I'm not gonna lie to you and say that you're the most gorgeous woman I've ever seen or that..." he paused, "that you're the best I've ever had in bed." She blushed furiously but he ignored and went on running a hand through her hair every few seconds. "What I do is sex; sometimes it's good, sometimes it's bad but really I don't care. As long as I get paid at the end of the night it doesn't matter who I'm with or how it was. It's my job and that's it, really," he paused.

"Patricia _is_ gorgeous, but she is egocentrical, too. Everything has to be about her. Terry is pretty but she is a bitch who can't think for herself as well; you simply can't hold a conversation with her for longer than five minutes." He sighed again, trying to gather up the courage to say what he really didn't want to. "So as you can see, they might be gorgeous and some may be 'talented', as you said, but they are nothing more than that. And believe me, you're better than you think in those aspects."

She looked down shaking her head. "I hate this. I hate that I care and that I wonder if you'd rather be with some other woman right now or if you are thinking of someone else when you're sleeping with me," she said angry and sad at the same time.

He brought her close and kissed hair gently. She cared; she had just told him she did. Some women had said they loved him and that they wanted to get him out of this life to keep him for themselves but he only despised the idea. And it was not like he would leave his job for Rory, but he couldn't keep lying to himself saying he didn't care about her as well.

He started drawing eights and circles on her wrist. "I like that you care," he told her in a very quiet tone. She turned her head, looking him oddly, questioning. He shrugged, "I guess what I'm saying is that... different from the others, I like you. And I don't want you comparing yourself to them when there is absolutely no point on doing so." He ran his hand through her hair again and looked straight into her eyes, "And also, I don't want you paying me anymore."

"Jess..." she started to protest.

"I'm serious. I know that you pay me cuz you want to 'help' me, but it's also because you want to own me. You can't own me, Rory. I don't want to be anyone's possession. But that doesn't mean we can't keep seeing each other… it just means that I'll be here for free, cuz I want to be here."

She swallowed the lump in her throat and kissed him softly. Maybe she couldn't have him for herself, but from now on when he was with her it wouldn't be for the money in the envelope lying on the nightstand.


	13. The Awkwardness

**A/N:** Sorry for taking so long, but now I'm kind of on vacation and I'll update more often. Huge thanks to my wonderful beta **Charli Lee** **(Sue)** - check out her stuff - and for everyone who read and review this story.

And please, review; as always, anything true goes.

* * *

**Chap 13 - It gets complicated and at the same time different**

He laid back on his bed with the telephone in his hand. This was getting ridiculous. He was waiting for her to call when he could perfectly well call her. But the question was: why didn't she call? It had been two weeks since their last encounter and things seemed to have gone well, so why did she suddenly disappear? He didn't really want to believe it, but the only obvious reason he could think of was the worst; she was just one of them. She liked to own him and if she didn't pay then she had as much say in their 'thing' as he did. Maybe her pleasure came from paying him, having him as inferior; a possession. And that thought made him furious, to think he fooled himself about her.

Finally, tired of his internal debate, he dialed her number to be able to figure it out and move on.

"Hello," came her tired voice on the other side.

"Hey, it's Jess," he told her, even though she knew from his caller ID. "Sorry I called, I shouldn't have…"

He's ready to hang up when he her say, "Wait."

"Why did you call Jess:"

"Well, I haven't heard from you for a while now. I was just wondering if you were okay."

"Oh, I'm okay. Thanks."

"I guess I better go."

"Uhm… I wanted to talk to you. Do you have some free time…?"

He sighed having a good idea about where this was going. A client had never asked to stop seeing him, but as they say, there is a first time for everything. And if that was the case he'd rather be done with her as soon as possible instead of being dumped later. "Can you meet me for lunch?"

"Sure. Same place:"

"Yeah. I'll meet you there in an hour."

"Okay, see you then."

* * *

Jess entered the small restaurant and walked to Matt. "Hey," he nodded as a greeting. Matt looked up at him and silently nodded to the back of the restaurant where Rory sat.

"How long has she been here?"

"About 15 minutes. You want a drink?"

Jess shook his head, "No, I don't think this will take long."

Matt knew when not to probe, "Okay, good luck then."

Jess walked to her table and sat across from her. "Hey."

"Oh, hi," she said startled.

He stared at her blankly for a minute and when she didn't say anything he got impatient, "Well, you said you wanted to talk."

"Right. Sorry," she looked at the table suddenly finding it interesting. "So, how have you been?"

He chuckled humorless, "Come on, you didn't ask me to meet you here to know how I am. What do you want, Rory?"

Her eyes widened at his cold tone and she started picking at her nails, "I-I don't..."

"You don't what?" he said harsher than he intended and at his nervous expression he got fed up at her lack of conversation. "Okay, I'll help you with this since you seem to be so out of practice. You don't want to see me anymore. You want this ... 'thing' to be over or to go back to the way it was."

"What? No!" she said forcefully, calling the attention of a few customers.

He looked at her curiously, "Then what do you want?"

She ignored his question and made one of her own, "Why did you think I wanted to stop seeing you?"

He raised an eyebrow, "You used to call me to see me at least once a week, usually more, and then suddenly you disappear. What was I supposed to think:"

She narrows her eyes not understanding his line of thought. "But last time you told me you didn't want me paying anymore," she said as explanation.

"So?"

"So I can't call you," she said as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.

"What are you talking about?"

She blushed and glanced at him slightly shy; starting to suspect she had gotten everything wrong. "Well, since you said you didn't want me paying you I thought I didn't have the right to call you anymore, like your other clients. I mean, I can't just call and ask to meet you – I know you're always extremely busy with your _work_. So I thought when you had some free time and were in the mood you'd call me," she shrugged.

He smiled at her but as she continued her rant it soon became a smirk. "I thought you weren't interested anymore," he confessed casually.

"Why wouldn't I be interested?" she asked as if it was the craziest idea in the world.

He tilted his head to the side and shrugged, "Maybe there was no thrill for you if you weren't paying."

She blushed at the mention of the former terms of their "relationship" and he bit back a remark that would make her feel even more uncomfortable than this conversation already was.

"So I can just call you?" she asked unsure.

He nodded and she bit her lip, seeming to be debating with herself over what she wanted to say. Finally, "You can also call me, you know."

He leaned forwards on the table with a feline smile, "Really?"

She swallowed the lump in her throat before answering a weak, "Yeah."

His eyes suddenly softened and he stood up, "Come on."

She furrowed her eyebrows "Where are you going?"

He stared into her eyes and extended his hand to her. "Come on," he said again holding her gaze. She took his hand and they walked out of the restaurant. He stopped a cab, holding the door for her to climb in. He followed suit and gave the driver her address as she made a call.

"Diane... yeah, it's me. Look, something came up and I'll only be back later this afternoon-" she stopped when she felt Jess squeeze her thigh. She looked at him and he gave her a pointed look. "Actually, I don't think I'll be able to come back at all."

The driver, who obviously was paying attention to their conversation, chuckled.

"Take messages form whoever calls me and tell them I'll call back tomorrow. If some huge emergency happens – and I mean a life or death kind of thing – and no one else can handle it, then if there is no other choice, call me on my cell. Okay... good. See you tomorrow."

She glanced at him out the corner of her eyes and could only catch his smirk.

* * *

When they reached her apartment his lips were already on hers. He closed the door with his foot, tumbling into the living room. 

"Do your neighbors usually spend the day home?" he asked out of the blue.

She narrowed her eyes at him not understanding but answered anyway, "There is an old couple at the apartment across mine but I think that's it."

He sighed and detangled himself from her for a minute, "Okay." He just walked to her stereo and pushed play, turning the volume up not waiting for the song to start. His attention goes back to her neck as he made her walk backwards towards her room.

The song started and he smirked into her neck. She can't help but groan, "What?"

"Macy Gray?" He looked at her with mischievous eyes.

"Look, if you're going to mock my musical taste you can just-" she's cut off by his lips as his hands wander down her body looking for bare skin.

She broke the kiss, "Why did you put music on anyway?"

"Because today," he explained, "I'm going to make you scream."

She laughed at his cocky comment finding him way too conceited. She'd be the first to testify about his talents but he seemed too self-confident for his own good.

"Is that a challenge?" she half mocked but he answered her seriously.

"Nope," he said nipping at her lower lip. "That's a promise."

She felt a shiver run up her spine and surpassed a gasp. Maybe he had the right to be so cocky.

Her shirt went first, followed by his and in less than five minutes there were no clothes left, just bare skin lying on a bed. He kissed her neck making his way down to her chest. He didn't hurry, taking his time to enjoy every inch of her skin. When he finally reached her left breast he first kissed the underside before flicking his tongue over her nipple. He sucked on her breasts, paying equal attention to each in turns and she started to moan without noticing. Her hands traveled to his hair, running her fingers through it as he left a trail of kisses down her chest, over her belly-button and below. She became hesitant tugged on his hair signaling him to look up at her. "Jess," she said in a warning tone.

"You promised," is his only response, reminding her she had promised to let him repay the 'favor' she had done him a few weeks prior. She knew he was right and he was just as stubborn as her to not give up, so she simply sighed and lied back, letting him spread her legs and do as he wished.

As she felt his tongue on her she grabbed a handful of sheets, trying pointlessly to control her body. His ability to drive her crazy was unquestionable. She felt her hips involuntarily move and a familiar feeling stirring up inside her but this time it felt too intense for her too handle, it felt simply like it was too much. Moaning loudly she grabbed a pillow beside her and hid he face under it trying to muffle her cries, decided not to let him prove his point.

However he noticed her upped body moving and looked up, knowingly before moving his body up and over hers, throwing the pillow to the other side of the room. With his fingers replacing his tongue and his thumb pressed against her clit, his face only an inch away from hers, he smirked and berated her. "No cheating!"

She tried her best to glare at him but with the feeling he was evoking in her it was a lost cause. She arched her back bit her lip hard with an expression that was the perfect mixture of pain and pleasure on her face.

Resigned to 'help her', his lips went to the soft spot on the back of her ear - the one that got her trashing around – and he gently started to kiss and lick it. She instantly gave in screaming and moaning and letting the pleasure wash over her.

She was still panting, trying hard to breathe when she felt him sliding inside her. She gasped and he slowly started to move, giving her time to catch her breath before going to round two. When she started to meet his thrusts he began to move faster and harder, quickly leading her to a second orgasm. This time she didn't scream, too exhausted. He just groaned and moaned incoherent things; the only word that made sense was his name.

He came inside her with his face hiding in the crook of her neck. For a minute they just laid still, until he moved out of her and to his side of the bed. At that moment he realized he had a side on her bed. It wasn't anything big but this silent routine they had every time he came over was something that neither had seemed to notice but both got comfort from.

She broke his thoughts, "I'm thirsty."

He looked at her knowing where this was going, "And?"

She gave him the Bambi eyes and an innocent smile that harshly contrasted with the 'freshly fucked' look she displayed at the moment. "There are a few bottles of water in the fridge."

He raised his eyebrow and she blinked. "Please?"

He groaned but stood up and walked to the kitchen not looking back, knowing she had a victory smile on her face.

He came back still naked and handed her a bottle, finding she was already covered in black sheets. She drank the whole bottle in a few gulps and he laid by her side chuckling at her un-lady like manner before opening his own bottle and drinking from it. Her breathing wasn't quite regular yet so she closed her eyes trying to calm down her body. He put his bottle on the nightstand and rested his weight on his forearm to better observe her. She opened her eyes and was surprised to see him staring into hers.

"What?" she asked, her voice wavering.

He shrugged, "Nothing, just looking at you."

She laughed quietly and hid her face in her hands. "Careful, you're getting romantic…almost cheesy I would say," she murmured.

He smirked, always with a come back at the tip of his tongue, "Nah. It's just the side effect of getting laid."

She hit his shoulder and glared at him but couldn't stop smiling. Then she looked out of her window, staring off into space until he finally brought her back, "What is it?"

"Nothing. It's just… I'm happy. I just haven't felt like this in a long while."

"Huh," he laid his head on her outstretched arm facing her. "I thought I made you happy while I was working for you."

She tilted her head to be face to face with him, "You gave me pleasure. You know how good you are and you know how to use your talent. You made me feel," she blushed but carried on, "full of lust and wanted." She paused, "But then it was done. I'd pay you and you'd leave. And I'd crash back into reality, in which I'm a lonely lifeless workaholic who no one cares for."

"And now it feels different?"

She rested her hand on his cheek following her fingers as they traced his skin, "When I opened my eyes you were looking at me _that_ way. And I'm not paying you."

He knew what she was talking about. It also felt good for him to be with someone as an equal and not with a whiny bitch bossing him around.

He rolled over covering half her body with his own and whispered in her ear, "We should do this more often," kissing the spot between her jaw and neck.

She nodded, "So, I can call you?" she confirmed.

"Yeah, it's all still the same. The only difference is that you'll be saving some money."

She looked up at him, "You can also call me, you know?" she reaffirms what she had said in the restaurant.

He shook his head, "You're always busy with your work and all. I won't disturb you, don't worry."

"I was busy this afternoon," she pointed out but he remained silent. She turned his face with her hand so he was looking at her, "I told you, this isn't just about me. Especially now."

He looked down at her collarbone and then into her eyes, "This Saturday I won't work, I want to go to this place…" he trailed off, nervous for some reason. "Are you free?"

She didn't answer for a moment thinking about all the paperwork she had planned to work on Saturday and then shook her head as if it to clear it. "Saturday sounds good. Where are we going?"

He smiled and went back to hiding his face in the crook of her neck, "You'll have to wait and see."


	14. The Date

**Chap 14**** – Today I Just Wanna Do Everything For You  
**

**A/N: **Thank you to my wonderful beta **Charli Lee** for the help. Also, thank you for the reviews – they make me smile and keep writing. Some people made some interesting question, but I really don't want to put any spoiler here, so if you have any questions just PM me or send me a review with your e-mail and I'll answer it.

Someone asked me about 'Under the Same Roof' – I've just posted the re-written version along with the last chap. Some people asked me about the new fic I had mentioned… It's called "Sustain" and I'm writing it with my dear beta under the penname **Bru and Sue** – it'll be posted soon.

**Please review!**I really want to know what you think of this chap.

* * *

He rolled on his belly with a crooked grin and closed his eyes. She also rolled over, landing on him, her chest pressed against his back. 

"I'm glad you called" she told him.

"Well, you told me I could-"

"And you can."

"Good."

They sat in silence for a moment but her being a Gilmore couldn't help her need to talk. "You said you're going to take me somewhere on Saturday."

"I did?" he feigned confusion.

"Yes, you did," she said slightly put out and he couldn't tell if she was mocking him or if she really was mad.

"Well, I plead post-sex insanity."

"Post-sex insanity?" she questioned.

He turned his head to look at her. "Yeah, you know, after you have great sex and say cheesy stuff that you'd never normally say?"

She raised an eyebrow, "Great sex?"

"Well, wasn't it?"

"Of course it was," she said a little too enthusiastically and he smirked. "I mean, it was for me. I guess I just didn't think it was for you."

He narrowed his eyes at her, "You were there with me, right?"

She rolled her eyes and moved back to her side on the bed. He smirked sighing and turned to her, "Okay, talk."

She feigned disinterest on him while picking on her nails, "I don't know what you're talking about."

He snuggled against the crook of her neck. "I know that look, so just say what you want to say," he whispered into her neck.

She glanced down at his back and hidden face. "It's just the other day, when you said all that stuff about the other women, and how I shouldn't compare myself to them… well, you also said I wasn't the prettiest or best in bed."

At that he lifted up his head to look at her but didn't say anything. She glanced at him for a brief moment before avoiding his eyes and biting her bottom lip. She laughed humorlessly, "I know I must look like a dork to you. We both know I don't have all that much 'experience' with men in general. I mean, I'm no virgin, but after Logan… it was difficult to let guys come close to me. And since I'm no wild cat, or extremely gorgeous… I just don't understand why you don't want me paying you anymore," she rambled.

"I thought we had talked about it," he said quietly. "I've told you, I don't want your money. You can't buy me."

"I know, it's just-" she cut herself off sighing.

"What?"

She forced herself to look at him, "Besides money I have nothing to offer you."

He kept looking at her silently, shocked by her words. Okay, so he had been honest with her the other day, but that didn't mean she wasn't amazing. Her self-esteem was lower than he could have imagined. He knew she didn't think much of herself out of the office and from their conversation the other day he understood she was insecure not only about herself, but about what she meant to him. However, after their talk he thought she had understood she wasn't like the others. That he felt something for her, even if he didn't really want to admit it.

He dropped his lips to her belly kissing it and making his way up to her breasts, "Whose belly is that?" She narrowed her eyes not understanding but he just repeated the question, "Whose belly is that?"

"Mine," she said with a small voice.

"And these breasts?" he asked as he traced them with his tongue.

She shivered and had to swallow before answering, "Mine."

She feels his right hand on her left calf and running up to her thigh, "Whose legs are these?"

"Mine," she said, understanding his point, but still insecure.

He licked her collarbone until he reached her neck and dipped his head kissing the hallow of her throat, "Whose neck is this?"

"Jess, I understand-" she was cut off by a bite on her neck.

"Whose neck is this?"

"Mine," she answered moaning.

"And whose moans are those?"

"They're mine."

Suddenly he was on top of her, his face mere inches from hers and then he lowered his lips and started kissing her, his tongue slipping between her lips. The kiss was slow, lazy, and enjoyment with every moment. "Whose mouth is that? Whose tongue? Whose lips?"

"Mine. Mine. Mine."

He nodded and then smirked, "Who gets all hot and bothered when I make some notes on 'Howl'?"

She rolled her eyes at him, blushing, obviously still pissed off about that, "I do."

"Who asked me to be an equal in bed instead of bossing me around and being all bitch-y while still paying?"

She looked down, "I did."

He laughed before continuing, "Who gave me a blow job and still wanted to pay afterwards?"

She stared at him but answered anyway, "I did."

"Who listened to my childhood problems and about my drunken mother while being a client?" he asked soberly.

She put a hand to his cheek and smiled softly, "I did. And I always listen to whatever you want to tell me. Client or not."

He tilted his head, pressing his face harder against her hand, "Who just said that?"

Instead of answering she reached up and kissed him deeply, grateful for his reassurance.

He pulled back still looking into her eyes. "Listen, I don't know if I made myself clear the other day. There were more gorgeous or talented women… and I say that thinking in a very clinic distant way. Like when you analyze a chart. Sex has been like that for me for a long time now," he paused. "But as I told you, you are much better than you think. You're beautiful and of course I enjoy myself with you. I mean, you have to notice it; I'm a guy, I can't hide!" She giggled quietly blushing furiously and he went on smirking, "And, even though I'm not found of admitting it, sex with you hasn't been just a job for a while now. If it was only about getting laid I could do it with any of my clients and still get good money out of it. But I'm here with you right now because before, when I was inside you and you were leaving red marks on my back and groaning my name." He made her blush yet again. "It wasn't just lust I felt. You made me feel. And I don't think anyone - no bikini model or sex-driven vixen - has ever done that to me."

She smiled softly and ran her fingers through his hair, "Thanks."

"You're welcome. Now come here," he said, rolling them over and getting her on top of him. She laid her head on his chest listening to his heartbeat until he spoke up again. "And just to make it clear if you still didn't get it, all the stuff you said were yours; that's all I need from you."

* * *

He knocked on her door and took a step back. A moment later she opened it wearing a beige skirt, a green business blouse and short heels, her hair loose. He couldn't help but laugh a little. 

"What? I look too old with these clothes, don't I?"

He smirked and entered her apartment closing the door behind him. "Let me guess, most of your going outs are business related?"

She didn't answer and he took that as a yes. "Okay, come on," he said walking to her room. She followed him and when she got there, she found him going through her wardrobe.

"Hey, you can't just go through my stuff!"

He looked at her with a smirk, "Afraid I'll find something compromising?"

She glared as he grabbed a pair of jeans and a plain tee, throwing them on the bed. "Okay, this is the kind of stuff you want to wear when you go out with me."

"So I'll be going out with you again?" she teased with a smirk she stole from him.

"Not if you keep that smirk on. Now dress, I don't want to get there too late."

She stuck her tongue at him but started changing clothes as he went through her shoes. "God, don't you have a simple pair of sneakers among all these heels?" he asked, throwing a shoe to the back of the closet.

"Hey, careful there; that's Prada!"

He rolled his eyes, "Do you have any comfortable shoes?"

"High heels are comfortable after you get used to them. But answering your previous question, I think my mom left a pair of sneakers last time she came to visit me," she said pointing to another door in the closet. He opened it and got the pair of pink Chuck Taylor's before handing them to her, "Here."

"Thanks," she said, sitting on the bed and putting them on. When she was done he grabbed her hand, dragging her out, barely giving her time to get her purse on their way out.

* * *

They walked down the street side by side, looking at the small tents. Every now and then he would leave her to go check out the books of a specific tent, and more often than not she'd follow him, checking out another pile looking for something she still didn't have. When the sun stared going down and the sky was painted orange he snuck up behind her as she read the back cover of a book. 

"Anything interesting?" he asked, his arms circling her waist.

"Actually… that pile is mine," she said pointing to a tall pile on the corner of the tent.

He smirked into her neck making her shiver, "I thought you'd like this book fair."

She turned around in his embrace smiling, "I did. I didn't know there was this kind of thing in the city. It reminds me of my town."

"Well, this isn't exactly the part of town where you hang out, right?" he gave her a pointed look.

She shrugged, not wanting to admit he was right.

"And besides, aren't you from New York?"

She chuckled, "Oh, no. I was raised in this small town in Connecticut, Stars Hollow. We'd have every kind of town event and festival that you can imagine."

"Sounds annoying."

"I guess for you it'd be. But I was crowned the town princess, so it has its perks," she said with a big smile.

He laughed at the image of her on some ridiculous dress wearing a tiara. "Still have the tiara? Maybe we could use it."

She blushed and playfully hit him on the chest.

"Seriously though, did you have fun?" he asked looking down, "I know this isn't dinner at a five stars restaurant or going to opera… I just thought since you like to read-"

He was cut off when she reached out and kissed him, slowly at first but then passionate and hard. "I had lots of fun, really. Thanks for bringing me here."

He smiled. "Good. Now, it's getting late, I guess it's time to be heading home."

"Right, just let me pay for my books and I'll be ready to go."

He watched her go to the owner, overpaying him for the pile of used books she was purchasing. She walked back to him with a smile and two large heavy bags.

They walked down the street, passed a few cabs and a subway station before curiosity finally got the better of her, "Where are we going? I thought we'd take a cab back to my apartment with all these books."

He shook his head, "Just have to make a quick stop first." He led her into a shoe store a couple of blocks from the fair and turned to the salesgirl, "Hi, we need some Chuck Taylor's for her. What colors do you have?"

Rory looked at him with narrowed eyes, but followed him as he went to check the snickers the salesgirl was showing him. "Okay, so what color do you want?" he asked turning to Rory.

"Uhm… I don't know."

He looked at her for a minute before turning to the salesgirl again, "Do you have light blue, sky blue. Like her eyes?"

The girl smiled, "Yeah, we have it. What size?"

He repeated the question to Rory, "What size?"

"Seven."

"Okay, I'll be right back," the girl said going to the back to get her Chuck Taylor's.

Jess looked at Rory with an amused smirk.

"What? I have big feet!"

He just raised his arms in surrender.

"Why are we here anyways? I have shoes."

"Not comfortable ones, you don't."

"So what? You could have just told me to buy some Chuck Taylor's; I would have. You didn't have to bring me to buy then."

"What's the big deal?"

"Nothing, it's just… you make me look like a kid, having someone choosing my shoes."

He smirked at her petting her head as if she really was a kid. She pushed his hand and glared as the salesgirl came back with a box. It took about five minutes for Rory to try them on and say that she'd take them. The girl took the shoes back, going to the register as Rory followed opening her purse to get her wallet. But she was a bit too late as Jess was already paying for her sneakers.

"Hey, no, don't take his money. These are my shoes."

"Which I'm giving you as a present," he said handing the cash to the girl.

"I have money!" she showed him the bills she was holding.

"Well good for you. Buy yourself some manners and learn to say 'thank you'," he playfully bantered back.

She glared at him, "Why are you doing this?"

He wrapped his arm around her bringing her close, "Consider it an investment for next time we go out. After all, you'll have to give you're mother's shoes back one day."

She made a face, "Not really. She never gave me back my Gucci."

He shook his head. "Well, now you have your very own Chuck Taylor's," he said handing her the bag with the shoes, "which I dare to say are better than Gucci."

She mock gasped, "You wouldn't!"

"Oh, I would," he said, while getting his change and leading her out of the store. "_Now_ we can get a cab back to your apartment," he said hailing one and opening the door for her.

"Thank you for the shoes. And for the afternoon," she said while getting in the cab.

"You're welcome."

She got one of her new-bought books from a bag and started examining it, "Can you believe the books they had there? And they were so cheap!"

"Yeah, I know. I come to the fair every year."

She looked at him with the corner of her eye, still skimping the book, "How did you find this book fair anyway?"

"I live near here," he answered casually.

"You live near here?" she confirmed with raised eyebrows.

"Yeah, just a few blocks away. What? Where did you think I lived?"

"I don't know… I guess I never thought about that," she paused. "Do you live alone?"

"No."

"Oh?" she wasn't sure if she was allowed to ask more or not, never sure where the boundaries lied.

"I live with Matt. You know him."

"Of course, from the restaurant."

"Yeah."

"But, you could get your own place. I mean, with the money you make… I'm pretty sure you make enough to pay for your own apartment in the city."

"I do. But Matt doesn't. Besides we prefer the Brooklyn; we've grown up here."

"So that's why you're roommates with him, because he couldn't pay rent alone?"

"The company is good. And besides, there's no reason to waste money on a big apartment in the city when I'm fine in my shared match box in Brooklyn," he tried to reason.

She smiled. "You're a good friend," she told him quietly.

He didn't respond to her compliment, ignoring it completely. She noticed even though he always had the cocky façade, whenever she complimented him, he ignored rather shyly, as if he wasn't worth it.

"Can you spend the night?" she asked.

"I told Matt I'd go to the restaurant to have dinner with him before they closed, which would be in an hour and a half."

She nodded, "Its okay."

He looked at her for a moment. "Unless you want to join us…" She looked up at him unsure if he meant it, or was just trying to be polite. "It's okay, you can come," he said as if reading her mind, "but I'm warning you, there will be guy talk and Matt tends to flirt with anything with a skirt."

She chuckled and he came closer to whisper on her ear, "No worries, though, I'll protect you." She shivered more from his tone than anything else. "So, should we go now? We can do something while his shift is not over?"

She smiled nodding and he leaned over to the driver, telling him the address as she watched him.


	15. The Friend

**A/N:** Thank you all for the reviews. Also huge thanks to my beta **Charli Lee**. Sorry it took me longer to update this time but I was traveling. Please, review and let me know what you think; as always, anything true goes.

And my most sincere respect for the families and friends of the victims of the plane that crashed in Brazil last week.

* * *

**  
Chap 15 - I divided myself in a thousand pieces for you to pick up**

Jess looked up from his book and at her. She was lying on the couch, gray sweat pants and a black wifebeater on, reading glasses adorning her face as she went over some contracts. The interphone rang and Jess stood up pressing the button to let the person in before getting the money on the coffee table and opening the door. He opened the door and took the box of pizza before handing the money to the delivery guy. She stopped reading, putting the contracts to the side as he put the pizza on the coffee table, lifting the lid and grabbing a slice.

"Do you always work so hard?" he asked casually as he sat back on the floor.

"What are you talking about?" she asked as she grabbed a slice herself.

"You've been working on those contracts for the last hour and a half."

"Well, you didn't let me have much working time this weekend so I have to catch up."

He rolled his eyes at her workaholic habits, and took another bite of his pizza.

"What are you doing on Thursday?" she asked shyly but trying to sound as casual as she could.

He reached into his back pocket and checked his planner, "I have to work." He took another moment checking his planner and then added, "I'm pretty busy this week."

"Oh, right," she murmured looking down.

"Rory…" he sighed, "You've always known I wouldn't quit my job. And you know you can date whoever you want. It's not like we have something serious or anything…" he trailed off.

"I know, I know," she tried to plaster a fake smile on her face but not even that worked.

"Do you? I mean, I know you haven't been with anyone since we started this, but I'm not sure you understand you can go out and date and sleep with whomever you want. It's not like I have any claim on you."

"I know that, Jess," she tried to end the subject but he wouldn't let her.

"Really? 'Cuz it really doesn't look that way," he paused. "Rory, I like you. You're a nice girl and all but I have a job and it's not one in which I have an office and work from eight to five, but it's the way I pay my rent and get by. So I don't want you to feel like you have any kind of obligation to me 'cuz we both know I can't have any kind of obligation to you."

"I get it. It's fine, okay?" she said forcefully, maybe harsher than she intended, and he decided to let it go. Even though he knew it wasn't 'fine' by her tone he knew better than to start an argument with her while she was in denial. He just would have to bring it up again some other time. "Fine," he relented and they went back to their pizza with an awkward silence hanging over them.

* * *

She was sitting on her office reading some reports when her cell phone rang. She opened it distractedly, "Hello?" 

"Hey, baby. You busy tonight?"

She smiled and leaned back on her chair. "Maybe. What's on your mind?"

She could swear he was smirking even though she couldn't see. "Well then, now you are. You have a hot date with me."

"Really? I haven't seen you in over a year, you simply call and you think I'll just drop everything to go out with you? I don't think so."

"You know, you wound me, Mary. You know you've been the only thing in my mind the whole time I was away. I was just a little overwhelmed with work and maybe I wasn't the best friend this last year but now I'm back and I want make it up to you over dinner."

She rolled her eyes, "Fine. Meet me at that restaurant you took me the night before you left at 7:30. Don't be late."

"I'll be there. See you, Mary."

"Oh, and Tris?"

"Yeah?"

"Welcome back." She closed her phone and stared at it for a moment before putting the reports in a file and getting her purse. There was no way she would be able concentrate on reports now.

* * *

She entered the restaurant looking for those familiar blue eyes and soon enough she found him sitting by the window. She walked over and as the gentleman he is he stood up to greet her with a hug that would probably be inappropriate among the elite they had grown up in. he checked her up and down with an appreciative smile. She was wearing a black dress that ended just above her knees and even though wasn't extremely revealing had a sexy touch to it and black high heels that made her legs look longer. 

"I have to say you're more beautiful than I remember?" he said with his trademark smirk.

She pouted giving him the Bambi eyes, "Are you saying I wasn't pretty when we were dating?"

She chuckled at her childish behavior and shook his head, "You were gorgeous. All I'm saying is that my memory must be failing or you outdid yourself because you look simply ravishing."

She smiled at him and nodded, "I taught you well while we were together."

He rolled his eyes and sat down, "I didn't know I was a puppy."

She followed his lead and sat in front of him, "That's because I never told you."

He shook his head but didn't answer; instead he changed the subject. "So, how have you been?"

"I've been good. Work is fine. Actually I was promoted, but it's no big deal…"

"Of course it's a big deal. I've heard about your promotion, I'm really happy for you. Congrats, Mare."

"Thanks, Tris," she blushed lightly. "So, what about you? Not that I don't love spending time with you but shouldn't you be in England right now?"

He sighed and tilted his head, "Yeah, well… I'm coming back to the States. England was good, I really liked the experience, but I think there is more for me here, you know?"

She nodded quietly, "Yeah, I think I know what you mean. So, any women in your life?"

He gave her one of his charming smirks, "Baby, I've told you, you've been the only thing in my mind this last year."

She rolled her eyes but couldn't help but smile, "Yeah, yeah, sure…"

He sobered up a little, "Seriously though, there hasn't been any important woman since you. You know that."

She looked down and then into his eyes, "Tris, is this a date?" she asked truly unsure. Of course dinner with a guy – especially if he is your ex-boyfriend who you haven't seen for over a year – sounds something date-like, but since they broke up she couldn't make herself look at him _that way_ again. She loved him; that was for sure. But now it was much more a brotherly love than anything else. He was one of the very few people who truly cared about her just because she was the girl she was.

He looked out of the window taking his time to answer her. "When I called I wasn't sure. I miss you so much; you're a big part of my life, even though I was away I still cared about you. That's actually one of the reasons I asked you out; to figure out how I feel. But when you entered through that door… man, you are simply gorgeous, all grown up … a woman. And I felt proud of you; like a brother feels proud of his little sister." She nodded but didn't comment so he added unsure, "I'm sorry if that's not what you were expecting to hear but…"

She cut him off by hugging him tightly and kissing his cheek. "I feel the same way. It's actually a bit weird that we've dated. I feel like you're family… after all you're my best friend."

"Thanks," he smiled. "You know how much this means to me; especially with the family I have." Rory knew all about Tristan problems with his parents and their obsession over appearance and control over his life. She had always been supportive of him, trying to take him to her home so he could feel what a real family was like. Lorelai had kind of adopted him while they dated and even now she had a soft spot for the boy that reminded her so much of herself in her teens.

Changing the subject, Rory pulled away to look at him, "So, you're coming back to New York? I'm gonna have my best friend around again?"

He grimaced, "I'm not sure. I want to get a job in the east coast, but that's all I know. For now, I want to stay in New York while I go through the job interview phase."

"And where are you staying?"

"In a hotel a couple of blocks from here."

"Okay, it's decided, you're staying at my place."

He laughed, "Mary, I couldn't impose like that. Besides, I know for a fact you don't have enough space for me."

"Nonsense. You're staying with me. And okay, I know I don't have all that much space but you can sleep with me-" she cut herself off when she saw the dirty smirk playing on his lips before adding, "in the most innocent brother-sister way!"

"Way to kill my fantasies, Mare," he mock-pouted.

She glared at him for a moment. "Seriously Tris, we spent years sleeping in the same bed in a 'just friends' way, so no big deal, right?"

He smiled, "Of course, Mary. I was just kidding. I wouldn't be comfortable getting incestuous with you. Anyway, are you sure it's okay? I don't want to be a bother to you."

"You're not! Besides, it'll be good to have company; my apartment can get lonely sometimes. Just one rule: no bringing women over."

He rolled his eyes, "Of course. So, when can I move?"

"Tonight. I'm not so hungry anymore. Let's go to your hotel, get your stuff and go to my place. You can cook for me there."

"And I see you still have no problem taking advantage of my cooking skills."

She stood up leaving a couple of bills to waiter out of the kindness and being in a good mood, "Nope. That definitely hasn't changed."

* * *

Rory was opening a bottle of champagne to celebrate Tristan's arrival, wearing only a pair of panties and a matching camisette since it was just her and Tristan in her apartment when someone knocked on the door. She was a bit surprised by the knock but guessed it was one of her neighbors asking her to keep it down, so she just went over, still holding the bottle of champagne, and opened the door. What she definitely didn't expect was to find Jess holding a paper bag of Chinese food standing on her doorstep. 

"Hey, my client cancelled on the last minute, something about her husband coming home early or something…. So I thought we could eat together," he stopped when he heard a male voice.

"Mary who's at the door?" Tristan asked as he came from the kitchen wearing only a pair of black satin boxers.

Rory could see the flash of shock cross Jess face just as fast as it disappeared and his face turned blank. "Oh, I didn't realize you had company."

Rory rolled her eyes at his cliché sarcasm and sighed, "Jess, it's not what you think."

He chuckled humorlessly, "Come on, Rory. I'm the one who says that, not the one who hears and believes in that."

Tristan became unsure of what to do, so before he didn't anything stupid without noticing he did what he thought was prudent, "Mare, do you want me to leave?" he almost offered.

Rory shook her head and looked at him, "Of course not! Can you just please go back to the kitchen and finish making dinner?"

He nodded; "Sure," he went back to the kitchen not forgetting to the close the door behind him to give them some privacy. And for that Rory was forever thankful.

"I'm serious, it's not what you think, Jess," she started defending herself until she realized something and stopped, crossing he arms in front of her chest. "But if it was, it's not like it would matter. After all, it's like you said, we don't have anything serious, we can see other people."

He simply stared coldly at her, "Well, I'll let you go back to your date then," he said turning away and to the elevator.

She groaned but went after him, "Could you just stop being an ass for a moment and listen to what I said? It's not a date!"

"So that guy was only in his boxers and you're dressed like this," he glared at her clothes – or lack there of, "because…."

"We're friends!"

Again he chuckled humorlessly, "Sorry, but you don't strike me as the kind to have slumber parties with boys. Just out of curiosity, what do the two of you do? Paint each other's nails?" he asked, his voice filled with sarcasm and bitterness.

"God, you can be so difficult sometimes! Okay, so we have a past. What I'm saying is that we're just friends now. Really close friends."

He scoffed, "I bet."

"What the fuck do you mean by that? Who are _you_ to talk? You sleep around with anything on a skirt and I have to accept it's just your 'job' and that's the way it's gonna be. Now you find me having a fun night with a friend and suddenly you're not so cool with the 'seeing other people' part anymore?"

He sighed and rubbed his eyes, "I just didn't know you had someone. You never said anything about other guys, so I thought you're fine with just me."

"I've already told you! He's just a _friend_!"

"And what am I?"

"What?" she asked in shock. "Come on, Jess. You were the one who started with the whole 'casual' thing and now you are putting the responsibility on me?"

He sighed and threw his head back before looking at her, "Sorry, you're right. I don't know what I was talking about. I'll just leave you and your _friend_ alone."

She shifted her weight from one foot to another. "Jess, he _is_ just a friend. And even though it would be a little awkward, you can come in. We are just having dinner."

He shook his head, "Nah, I'll just come see you some other time when he's not here."

She bit her lip, her right hand playing with the hem of her camisette, "About that…" she paused, "he's staying here with me."

He gave her a look that was a mixture of confusion and pissed off. "Why?"

"Well, he was working in England for this last year and now he decided to come back to the States. He hasn't decided where he is going to work yet so I offered him to stay with me."

"Like living with you?"

She shrugged, "For now."

He sighed and ran a hand through his hair. "I'm going home; call me when you have some free time… _if_ you have some free time, so we can see each other or something."

She nodded, "I'll call you tomorrow."

He nodded and entered the elevator. She watched him feeling torn about letting him leave just like that but not knowing what else to say. She waited until the elevator doors closed to go back to her apartment, hitting her head against the now closed door and sighing.

"I'm sorry for the trouble. I'll just pack my things and go," Tristan said, leaning on the kitchen door.

"Don't be stupid. You're family, you're staying. It's not like you ever left me hanging for one of your bimbo girlfriends, so why do you expect me to do that to you?" she pushed herself away from the door and walked towards him.

He hugged her tightly then pulled away, "So, he is the boyfriend?"

She rolled her eyes thinking of her situation, "It's complicated."

"Please don't tell me you got into one of those 'open relationships' like you had with Logan again. You remember how well things turned out."

She looked away, "I wish."

He rose his eyebrows and pulled her to the couch getting to glasses on the way, "Come on, let's get you drunk enough to tell me what is happening."

"What about dinner?"

"It'll be your hang-over food," he smiled and led her to the couch. "So, who was that?"

"That was Jess."

"And he's you're…"

She sighed, "My nothing."

"Come on, Mare, a little help here?"

She stole a glance at him and bit her lip before taking a glass of champagne and downing it in one gulp. He served her again as she looked at him with a serious expression. "Okay, you can't ever say a word about this to anyone; and I mean it! No one knows about this."

"Scouts honor," he promised.

She scoffed, "As if you were ever a boy scout."

He smirked and waited for her to begin.

"Okay, so it all started a few months ago. I was in one of those dinners with the girls. You know then, Sam, Clara…"

"You still go out with those bitches?"

She scowled at him, "They're not that bad."

"They would stab you in the back if they would get a promotion for that."

Rory decided to ignore his comment knowing it was true and go back to her story, "Anyways, we were having dinner and talking and then we started complaining about our love lives – well, actually the lack of love in our lives. So Samantha started talking about how she solved that problem."

Tristan half smirked, half grimaced, knowing Samantha and how cruelly objective she could be, "Oh that must be good."

"She pays guys to sleep with her."

Tristan choked on his wine. "She uses male hookers. God, I feel sorry for those guys!"

Rory giggled at his comment, also feeling sorry for the poor guys. She felt a bit relieved that Tristan wasn't disgusted or annoyed by the idea. His opinion meant a lot to her and she really needed to talk to someone about this.

"Yeah… well, she indicated me a 'professional' to solve _my_ little problem. She never went out with him 'cuz she is more than satisfied with her gentleman friend so she gave me his card."

Tristan had to laugh at that. "My little innocent Mary seeing a male hooker?! Now that's something I'd pay to see."

She blushed furiously avoiding his eyes and he finally realized she hadn't denied she had used the phone on the card. His laughter died and he looked at her strangely, "Mare?"

She drank some more champagne, "I don't know what happened to me. I guess I was that desperate so, I called him…" she paused. "I tried to back down but he was very persuasive. Convinced me to meet him and then we could decide to either give it a try or just forget we ever met."

"So, you met this guy?" Tristan asked, putting the pieces together and having a good idea about how her story would end.

"Yeah, we met. And, you know…" she blushed even more. He nodded and put and arm around her to show his support. She smiled appreciatively at him. "We met a few more times and I don't know... I guess it wasn't just… sex for me anymore. But I couldn't tell him that; I mean, it's just a job to him, so I just kept seeing him," she paused. "He met Will; I met a couple of his clients… And then one day we got into an argument and he said he didn't want me paying anymore."

Tristan's eyebrows rose in confusion, "So he's not your hooker anymore?"

"He was never mine," Rory murmured bitterly before taking another sip from her glass. "But yeah, I guess you could say that. He doesn't _work_ for me anymore, but we still see each other…casually. Kind of like Logan, but he's not a son of a bitch like Logan," she tells him tersely. "But he still works for all those other women," she looked down sad and ashamed.

He pulled her into his arms hugging her, "So, Jess is a hooker."

She said a small, "Yeah."

"And you don't pay him anymore but you still sleep with him?"

She nodded quietly.

"And you're in love with him."

She tensed and froze. She looked up at his clear blue eyes that help no judgment and knew her just as much he knew himself. She opened her mouth to protest and say that she had no feelings for Jess, but he just smiled kindly at her and nodded, "Yeah, you're in love with him. And as always, you suck at admitting it. I still can't believe how long it took me to convince you to go on a date with me or not to run after we kissed," he remembered chuckling.

"But anyway, this is not about you and me… So, how do you feel about Jess's job?"

She gave him a look, "How do you think I feel about that?"

He gave her a sympathetic smile, "Yeah, sorry. But have you ever talked about it?"

Rory tilted her head, "He made himself pretty clear saying we have no obligations with one another. That he won't leave his job so I can just date whoever I want."

"But?"

"I don't wanna date anyone but him," she admitted sadly and buried her face on his chest. Only with her face pressed against his skin she noticed the wetness on her cheeks and realized she had been crying a good while now. "God, I'm pathetic."

He shook his head and kissed her hair, "No, you're not. You're just in love and hurt. And you have every right to be in this situation." They spent a few moments in silence as Tristan stroked her hair, "So, what happened today?"

She shrugged, "I don't know. I had asked him if we could see each other today but he said he had to work and was busy the whole week… so I just decided to celebrate your arrival and try to put him in the back of my mind for a night. But apparently it's too much to ask…" she laughed humorlessly. "His client cancelled on the last minute so he bought Chinese and came over to 'surprise' me, but he ended up being surprised." She shrugged again, "He was just… so upset that you were here. He thought you were my date or something and he just got mad and frustrated… I had never seen him like that."

"He was jealous," Tristan stated. Any guy could recognize the expression on Jess' face when Tristan walked out of the kitchen only on his boxers.

Rory looked up at him with sparkling eyes, "You think so?" trying not to sound hopeful but failing miserably.

He smiled at her naivety and nodded, "Yeah, I'm pretty sure he got the wrong picture when he saw us dressed like that and by the look on his face he would gladly pull my head off."

Rory couldn't help the grin that overtook her features. "It'd be good if he was jealous. I always feel like the loser… waiting for him, wondering about him, feeling jealous of him…"

Tristan kissed her forehead, his arms still around her, "Believe me, you're not a loser. You're an amazing woman and sooner or later Jess will realize that. And if he doesn't… well, then some other guy will."

She nodded, not commenting that she didn't want some _other guy_. Tristan yawned, tired and took her into his arms as he stood up, "I think it's time to go to bed."

She let him carry her to her bed and watched as he walked to the other side – to Jess's side – and got in himself. He kissed her arm and went back to his previous position, keeping his distance from her, "Good night, Mare."

She looked at him through hazed eyes, "Thanks Tris, for being here for me."

He smirked, but not in a malicious way, just in his trade mark way and nodded, "Always."


	16. The Tiara & The Boa

A/N: First I'd like to apologize for taking so long to update this. I was very upset cuz Sex or Love was stolen from me and posted in another site as a Buffy/Spike fic. I wouldn't have minded if the person had asked and given credit but it really bothered to feel robbed like that. Fortunately, imfrknidiotic sent me a message letting me know what was happening and the owner of the site – Pari – was amazing, removing it right away. So I'd like to say a huge thanks to Pari, imfrknidiotic and the people from Spuffy Realm who checked out SoL after reading the 'impostor fic'.

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**Chap 16 - What I most wanted was to prove to everyone that I didn't need to prove anything to anyone**

She opened her eyes and looked at the blonde man sleeping by her side. And then Jess came to her mind and she sighed. It's a funny thing how he was always a constant thing on her mind. She stood up grabbing a sweatshirt and putting it on as she walked to the living room. She looked at her watch; seven thirty. Maybe he was still sleeping. Maybe, after he left her place last night he went to some client and still hadn't even gotten home yet. Whatever the case was it didn't matter; she had to talk to him. He answered on the second ring, his voice full of sleep, "Hello?"

"Hey," she whispered.

"Uhm… hey," he greeted back unsure.

She started playing with the hem of her sweatshirt, "Sorry I woke you up."

"It's okay," he said as he looked at the time. "Isn't it too early for you to be at the office?"

"I'm still at home."

"Ah." He paused.

"How was your night?" she couldn't help but ask.

"Uneventful," he answered shortly and she sighed in relief. "Yours?"

"Nice. It was good to catch up. Talk."

The silence was uncomfortable and for a moment he thought about hanging up and going back to sleep, pretending the last couple of days hadn't happened. However, he thought it better to make things clear now while it's all still new – and it wouldn't hurt as much to have to forget. He closed his eyes, "I know last night was unexpected but I meant what I said. You can see and do whoever you want. I didn't mean to sound…" he trailed of not wanting to finish with 'possessive' or 'jealous', but not able to think of any other adjective.

"Jess, twenty-four hours ago you knew you were the only guy in my life, right? Well, nothing has changed. You're still the only one." She felt like a ridiculous love-struck, admitting in a way, her feelings for a hooker who probably didn't care half as much about her. But sometimes she just couldn't control her own tongue.

He didn't respond for a long time and then, "Do you wanna have dinner?"

"I thought you were busy all week."

"I can make time for you. So?"

"Yeah, sure. There is a diner just on the corner of my apartment. Can I meet you there around eight?"

"I'll see you then," he answered before hanging up. She just stared at the telephone in her hand.

He played with the salt and pepper shaker as he waited for her. This was ridiculous; he knew that.

"Hey, sorry I'm late," she said as she sat in front of him. Her white blouse had the two top buttons open showing more skin than normal, and he noticed she was wearing a new necklace.

He shrugged as if he didn't care. "How are you?"

"Fine," she gave him one of her genuine smiles.

"And the boyfriend?"

She sighed, "I've told you he's not my boyfriend. But Tristan is also fine."

Jess didn't comment, just nodded and stared at her quietly.

"I didn't expect to see you last night."

"Client called it off and I thought you'd like some Chinese. But I think you were too busy with your Champagne."

"We were just celebrating Tristan's arrival."

He scoffed, "Yeah, I've figured."

"What?"

"Nothing."

"What's wrong with you?"

"Nothing is wrong with me. I just don't get why you didn't tell me about the silk boxers guy," he said a little more bitterly than he intended.

"I didn't know he was in the city. He called me yesterday asking me to dinner and since I knew you'd be busy anyway I didn't see any problem."

"And you just invite a guy who you didn't even know was in your city, to stay in your apartment out of the blue?"

"Jess, stop doing that. I didn't do anything wrong. It's not like Tristan is just some guy I met yesterday. He's been there most of my life. He's the person who knows me the most just next to my mother."

He clenched his jaw, "So what's the story between the two of you?"

"Well, we met when we were sixteen and became best friends. After a while he was almost like a brother. He'd spend more time in my house than in his; and with the parents he has I don't blame him. Then we went to college and it was harder to keep in touch but we always remained close, even though we couldn't see each other as often."

"So that's it? You didn't date then?" he asked knowingly.

Rory blushed lightly and looked away. "Before we became best friends and all we've dated for a while."

"How long is 'a while'?"

She looked at him, "'A while' is a while. I don't ask about ex-girlfriends or even current customers. What gives you the right to question and judge my life?"

He knew she was right but he wouldn't admit it even if his life depended on it. Instead he leaned back against his chair staring at her and memorizing her features. It was unnerving to Rory but she wouldn't give him the pleasure of seeing her squirm under his gaze.

"My clients are desperate cold horny bitches. Do you really want to know about them?"

She crossed her arms, leaning against her chair, mirroring his posture. Focusing on the table cloth she answered, "No."

"I've never had a girlfriend. It was always casual, I thought I was too young to commit. Then I started this work and dating kind of wasn't an option anymore, so nothing to tell."

She definitely didn't expect that. She thought he had been a real Don Juan before he started working like that and just decided to get some money out of it. "Did you use to date a lot before? I mean, nothing serious, just casual dates?"

He smirked, "Hook ups." He shook his head, "Nah. Of course I'd have some fun every now and then but most girls were just too boring."

Her eyebrows rose at that, "Huh." Well, if he found most girls boring then what was she? Certainly not Miss Spontaneous.

"Anything else you wanna know?"

She thought for a moment, "Nothing I can think of at the moment."

He took that as he cue to go back to his own questions. "You slept with him, didn't you?"

"What?"

"With blondie," he specified in a mocking tone.

"No!"

"Never?"

She stared at him coldly but didn't answer. He knew the answer. They kept the staring contest until he gave up and threw his head back, letting it hit the glass window that was behind him. He sighed trying to keep his cool and choose his words carefully before continuing, "I'm sorry okay. I know I have no right to ask about your personal life, I just… couldn't help myself." He admitted through clenched teeth, as if it caused him physical pain to tell her that.

She looked down understanding him in a way. She felt jealous of him when she found him talking with his clients and if what Tristan said was true, last night he had been the one feeling jealous of her. She looked at his face that hid his emotions so well. Still, she couldn't accuse him of not answering any of her questions so far. It's true he could be extremely vague at times but he never left her hanging.

"You can ask stuff. Just don't start talking Tristan down cuz that bothers me. He's my friend and I care about him."

He nodded in agreement event though he didn't like the way she talked about him. "So, did you?" he went back to his previous question, wanting to hear her say it.

"Yes. He was my first."

He swallowed not expecting that. "You were in love with him," he almost stated.

She blinked a couple of times. "At the time I thought I was, but no. I loved him; I just didn't know what his role in my life was. Only later on I figured I didn't love him like _that_."

"You sure about that?"

She nodded, "Yes. We were talking about this last night... He was telling me how proud he was of the woman I became; brother pride." She said with a small smile, looking down.

"What did you tell him when he asked about me?"

She looked up at him and bit her lip knowing it was pointless to deny they had indeed talked about him. She looked down to avoid his eyes, "The truth," her voice was low but clear.

He arched his eyebrows in surprise, "What part?"

"Everything. All the truth."

"Huh." He went back to playing with the pepper and salt shaker in front of him. He could only imagine Tristan's opinion about him if he cared about Rory the way she told him he did. "I guess this Tristan guy must like me just as much as I like him right now."

She giggled a little. "He thinks you're fine." Jess looked at her in obviously disbelief so she added. "Tristan has been judged all his life over his appearance, his money or his reputation so he avoids judging other people."

Jess nodded still not quite believing. "I haven't seen you in a 'more than friendly way' in a while," he commented casually.

She pressed her lips together. "You've been busy. And we had some other kind of fun these last few times we've met."

"I know. Book fair, movies… it was all fun. I'm just… I wanted to have sex with you last night," he told her bluntly.

She looked at him in shock. "Sorry?" she tried before realizing how ridiculous it sounded. She shrugged, "I thought we had established that we wouldn't set dates to have sex."

"That's not what I meant," he said shaking his head. "What I mean- What I was trying to say… is that I missed you."

She gave him a small smile. "Ditto." He returned the smiled as they kept stealing glances from one another. "Look, we've been here for almost an hour and we haven't ordered yet. How about we order something to go and walk back to my place."

He made a face, "I don't know. I don't think that's a good idea."

"Come on, Tristan is cool. You've never even talked to him! Besides I don't know for how long he is staying at my place and your place is off limits so…"

"Fine."

Rory opened the door with a hand as the other held a paper bag. "I'm home," she announced to the apparently empty apartment.

"Good. How was your date with-"came Tristan's voice as he left Rory's room to meet her and unexpectedly, "Jess."

Jess stared at Tristan in a not so friendly way but nodded at him in acknowledgement to show Rory he was trying.

Rory was the one to break the awkward silence. "Fine. We decided to eat here. You can join us," she invited.

"Nah, I don't want to be a bother. I'll just stay in the room."

Rory looked from one to another and sighed. "Okay, you know what? I'll go take a shower so you two stay here and behave. When I'm back we can eat together and after that you two won't have to see each other ever again, okay?"

They remained silent and she took that as an agreement, going to her room and closing the door behind her. Both men stood in the living room silently looking at the walls or out of the window, not knowing what to do with themselves.

Jess sat on the floor, his back against the wall and sighed. "What do you do?" He tried to break the silence, thinking of how important work was to Rory and everyone around her apparently.

"I'm unemployed."

"Right," Jess answered as he remembered Rory telling him that and shifted his weight from one side to another.

"What about you?" Tristan tried politely. Jess merely raised his eyebrow looking strangely at him until he remembered. "Oh, yeah."

The uncomfortable situation made Jess chuckle. "So, Rory told you about that, huh?"

Tristan nodded and tried to defend her in a way, "She needed to talk to someone." He sat on the couch.

"You think she deserves better," he stated, positive the other man would start a speech about how he was wrong for Rory. But to his surprise Tristan stayed quiet for a moment before correcting.

"I think she deserves to be happy. I don't know if you can do that, but I really hope you can."

Jess studied his posture, his jaded shoulders and tired expression. "You really aren't after her."

At that Tristan had to laugh. "Definitely not. And I didn't know about you two otherwise I wouldn't have agreed to stay here."

Jess shook his head, waving the idea off as if it hadn't bothered him at all for past day. "You're her friend. Besides it's not like we have anything serious."

"Really?" Jess just glared at him, not answering. Tristan looked down and cleared his throat, "Okay, I know I probably shouldn't say anything but you seemed pretty upset last night if it's not serious at all."

His shoulders hardened and his defenses went up. "Maybe you were paying too much attention to her butt to notice anything else."

Tristan just shook his head ignoring the comment altogether. "Look, I'm not here to lecture you or give you the 'hurt her, I'll hurt you' speech. My life is too screwed up for me to try to get my nose on other people's business. However, Rory is like a sister to me and I care about her way too much to see a guy get near her and hurt her over nothing. She told me she is not paying so I guess the only reason you'd have to be with her was be either for the sex – which I doubt since you have your job – or because you have a thing for her – which you deny. And that's where you're getting me confused."

"I don't have to explain myself to you," he responded harshly.

"And I'm not asking you to. What I'm saying is: if you have a thing for her, then by all means try to keep what you have working and make her happy. But if you're seeing her for any other reason, get away from her for your own good."

"I thought there would be no 'hurt her and I'll hurt you' threats," Jess mocked.

"And there wasn't. After all, we both know you fit in the first category."

Jess remained silent, not agreeing or denying. They heard her unlocking the room and Tristan stood up, "Well, I'm going to her room and I'm not getting out of there until tomorrow around nine, so you kids can have all the fun you want in the living room or wherever else. Just try to keep it down, I really enjoy my sleep." He turned and started going towards the room when Jess called his name.

"Maybe you're not so bad."

Tristan smirked, "Neither are you. Maybe next time we meet we can talk like normal people and not like ex and current… whatever," he finished unsure.

Jess didn't comment but they had reached an understanding. Rory opened the door going to the living room and Tristan quickly slipped into her room locking the door again.

She looked at Jess confused, "What happened?"

"Nothing. I think he just wanted to give us some privacy."

"So you two talked?" she questioned, walking towards him. She stood between his legs and he rested a hand in each calf smiling up at her.

"You could say that," he kissed the inside of her knee.

"And?"

"And…"

"You're not gonna tell me, huh?" she asked looking down, running her hand through his hair.

He tugged on her leg, "Come down here and I might tell you…" he teased.

"Jess… we can't! Tristan…" she whimpered.

"He is not leaving that room for the next ten hours."

She cocked an eyebrow at him, "How do you know that?"

He smirked at her, "Oh, that's precious information. I think you should at least try to earn it…"

She rolled her eyes but knelt down straddling him, "So?" she asked while kissing his neck.

"He's alright," he shrugged. "He said he wanted to let us have some fun since he felt bad about staying here and all…"

She nodded knowing it was something Tristan would do. She looked up at Jess with a grin and asked in a mischievous tone, "Guess what I found in my closet while I was looking for some clothes?"

He raised an eyebrow in curiosity and shrugged showing he had no idea. Her grin grew widened and she reached behind her back to put on her gold princess tiara with pink feathers and colorful stones. He started laughing.

"Oh, and that's not all." She stood up and went to the other room, coming back a minute later with a pink feather boa.

"You've gotta be kidding me!"

"You asked if I still had it. I thought it wouldn't hurt to look around and…"

He picked her up easily and she wrapped her legs around his waist as he carried her to the couch. He looked at her with laughing eyes remembering an old conversation, "Sorry, but this time it'll have to be on your couch."

She mock-shrugged. "If we must…"


	17. The Accident

**Chap 17 - Someone told me you were crying...

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**A/N:** Sorry it took me so long to update - again! I'll have a new chap up in a month tops, I promise! And maybe a one-shot next week. And please, review!

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He woke up groaning from the awful pain on his back. Raising his head he discovered that it wasn't only his back that was in pain and looking around he soon found out why. He was laying on Rory's living room floor and for some unknown reason there was a snicker under him, pressed against his spine. He rubbed his neck, which was also sore, and looked to his side to find a sleeping Rory on her belly. Her hair was splayed around her back, her head was leveled with his ribs and her lips were slightly parted. He checked the clock; seven fifty, they still had another hour until Tristan left the room. He quietly stood up to look for his boxers that were behind the couch – God knows how they ended up there – and then he put them on.

He looked back and smiled at what he saw. The sunshine that came through the window made her skin look like gold. Her hair was a beautiful mess on her back, her cheek pressed to the floor just like her breasts. One arm laying in front of her face, the other by her side. He sat by her side watching her face as she slept. She was beautiful no matter what she thought. Sometimes he wondered if he should praise her or try to reassure her somehow so she would feel better about herself. But it just wasn't him. No matter how much he cared about her it wasn't like him to actually admit that he cared about someone, to show how vulnerable he could be. He lightly touched her shoulder blade tracing it, his fingers barely touching her skin. She shivered but didn't wake. He placed his fingertips against the skin of her thigh and slowly ran them up, watching her face carefully for any kind of reaction. She began to smile even before her eyes opened. "Hey."

"Hi," he answered with a smile of his own.

"Were you watching me while I was asleep?" she asked letting a smirk grow on her lips and narrowing her eyes.

"I just woke up," he tried to defend himself.

"Whatever you say," she said with an innocent expression that told she didn't believe him in the least. "What time is it?"

"Almost eight."

"Good. We still have an hour. I don't want to get in an awkward situation with Tristan," she moved to stand up but he held her down. She looked at him questioningly. Unsure of what to say, he looked away and asked, "There is still an hour. Can we just stay here for a while longer?"

He half expected her to smirk like the cat that ate the canary or make some comment on his 'weakness' but she only looked at him with those big blue eyes and silently nodded before laying back next to him again. They laid face to face on the floor, watching each other.

"I like your neck," he said suddenly and she looked at him confused. "I mean, it's so pale and it bruises at the lightest bite. I could give you a hickey that would last for weeks if I wanted," he paused, still admiring her neck, to focus on her eyes. "And I've really wanted to do it but I'm betting it wouldn't go so well in the office," he mocked. Then he shrugged and focused on her neck again, "It doesn't mater; it's just a stupid idea," he tried to wave it off but it sounded far fetched.

"You could do that somewhere else instead of my neck," she suddenly whispered surprising both of them.

He looked at her like he barely recognized her, ran his fingers through her hair and kissed her, moving over to get closer. "You would let me mark you just like that?" he confirmed, whispering on her ear. She opened her eyes to look into his and understood that it wasn't about the hickey itself but its meaning. He was asking if she would let him have the upper-hand, do as he please, mark her as his, if she really was different from all the other women or if in the end they were all the same. She kissed him biting on his bottom lip, "Yeah, if that's what you want."

He tried to find any hesitance or any sign that she was bluffing but he could find none so he started kissing his way down her neck to the side of her right breast. He kissed and bit the same spot several times, hinting on what he was going to do next. Then he stopped and looked up into her eyes, his lips still touching that same spot. Her only response was to rest a hand over his head, encouraging him to go ahead and do as he pleased. He started sucking on her fair skin and soon had her moaning as he played with her other breast with his hand. At times he would shift from sucking to kissing and licking and biting. He wanted to leave a mark but he didn't want the process to be unpleasant to her.

After several minutes of handy work he finally stopped to admire the outcome. On the side of her right breast there was a large purple bruise with small red dots.

"How does it look?" she asked, seeing his proud smile.

"It looks good," he answered with a small smile and shining eyes, still focused on the bruise. "You feel okay, right?" he asked a little concerned kissing the marked skin.

She nodded her head, "Yeah, I'm fine. You know, I didn't think you'd actually _want_ to do something as simple as that. I mean, you've experienced so much more, why would you want to do this?"

He shrugged but didn't answer. He traced the bruise with his fingertip, "This will last for a good while."

"That was the idea, wasn't it?"

"If some other guy sees this he won't be happy," he commented.

"You know there is no one else."

"There will be," he said still focused on the spot, refusing to look her in the eye.

"Jess…" she started but he cut her off changing the subject.

"I should get going. Blondie will wake up soon," he said standing up and putting on his boxers.

She nodded quietly as she watched him. "When will you be free this week?"

He sighed, "I've already lost two days of work this week… I think I will only be free on the weekend."

She bit her lip but nodded again. When he was dressed he bent down to kiss her, "Don't have too much fun with Blondie." She smiled at his nickname to Tristan and the tone of jealousy that his voice still held. He kissed her again and then whispered, "And don't throw away the tiara and the boa just yet. They might be useful," he smirked before grabbing his jacket and leaving the apartment as she stared at his back in shock.

* * *

She hugged her legs, her back resting against the headboard of her bed. "Do you really have to go?"

He smiled at her childish behavior as he put his clothes in the open luggage that was on her bed, "Ror, we've already been through this."

"But you could stay just for a few more days. I could use some company," she whined.

"I've stayed here for over two weeks. Besides, if you feel lonely you can just call Jess."

"Yeah," she scoffed, "like he is going to drop his clients to come to me."

"You never know," Tristan shrugged. "Besides, I'm pretty sure Jess can't stand me being here anymore."

"No way! He likes you."

"Yeah, he adores me!" Tristan mocked. "You remember his face when he found out we were sleeping on the same bed?"

Rory started laughing hysterically, "Yeah, that was good."

"I thought he was going to kill me!"

"Of course he wouldn't!" she said rolling her eyes. "Anyway, where did he think you were sleeping?" she wondered as if there was no other obvious choice.

"My guessing is anywhere but with you. Especially after you told him we've dated when we were kids."

She bit her lip with a mischievous smile, "Did he say anything to you about that?"

"I don't think he actually needed to by the way he reacted. Come on, Ror, when you complained that I still moved way too much in my sleep the guy glared at me as if he was going to rip my neck and then he just got up and left out of the blue. Or do you think he actually had somewhere to be and suddenly remembered?"

She tilted her head, "Is it horrible that I like that he is jealous?"

Tristan walked up to her and kissed her forehead, "Nope. He'd be crazy not to be, anyways."

"You're the sweetest ex-boyfriend in the world."

"It's just because you gave me a place to stay rent-free with a gorgeous woman in my bed as a bonus," he winked at her. She threw a pillow on him but didn't drop her smile.

"Seriously though, I wish you could stay."

He finished packing his luggage and sat on the bed besides her. "Look, I'll be just a few miles away. If anything happens you call me and I'll come back in a blink, okay?" he said hugging her.

"Yeah, whatever," she sighed in defeat as she hugged him back.

* * *

Rory was walking home after work when her cell phone rang. She looked at it to check the id but it was an unknown number. "Hello?"

"Rory?"

"Yeah, who is this?"

"It's Matt, Jess' friend. We had dinner together a few weeks ago."

"Oh, hey! Is everything okay?" she asked absently, wondering why he would call her.

"Kind of. Actually, Jess had an accident. He was hit by a cab."

"What? How is he? Is he hurt?" she started asking in panic.

"No, no. He's fine. He just broke his leg and hit his head, but nothing serious."

"Good," she paused trying to gather her thoughts. "What hospital is he in?"

"He has already been released. They just put a cast on him and let him go. Actually, that's why I'm calling you," he started unsure.

She turned and entered the nearest café to pay exclusive attention to him. "I'm listening."

"Look, I'd never ask you this in a normal situation but I have to go to work or I'll get fired and I'd feel better if I knew someone was here with him. It's not that he is in danger or anything, I just don't want to leave him alone tonight…"

"What about his friends?" she asked the first thing that came to her mind.

He paused, confused, presuming she already knew the answer. "He doesn't have any friends," he said in a tone that made it sound like it was common knowledge.

"Oh."

"You know what? Forget it. I shouldn't have called; you don't have to come. He is fine, he will be fine. Just please don't tell him I called you-"

"No, no, wait! I'll come over. Just give me the address and I'll be on my way."

Matt sighed not sure about what to do. Finally, he gave her the address and she wrote it on her hand. "Okay, I'll be there in fifteen," she hung up as she left the café and hailed a cab.

* * *

She looked suspiciously at the building in front of her. It was simple, modest; too traditional for Jess in her opinion. She checked the address to confirm she was on the right place before climbing the stairs to the third floor and knocking on a plain wood door.

Matt opened the door not even greeting her as he went back inside to finish getting ready. She let herself in, closing the door behind her before following him inside.

"Sorry but I'm running a bit late. This is the living room, at the end of the hall is the bathroom, that's my room and that is Jess' room," he said pointing to the different doors as he buttoned his shirt. "He's sleeping right now. The doctor said he would probably sleep for the next few hours because of the medication. Here are some painkillers he can take every eight hours if he complains about the pain. He can't move much because of the cast and right now he must be dizzy so try to convince him to stay in bed. And I don't mean it in a dirty way; although if that's what will take to keep him in bed…" he trailed off, half joking and looked at her. Rory's face was blank, just trying to listen carefully to everything Matt said and memorize every instruction.

"I should be back around three, if you could stay until then it'd be great but it's okay if you can't."

"I'll stay," she told him curtly.

"Good, then you're more than welcomed to stay over. There isn't much food in the fridge but help yourself to whatever you find. There must be some old take out that I brought from the restaurant but I think that's it. This is my number if you need anything," he said taking her cell phone and saving his number. "Oh, and this is Jess' phone," he said handing her the phone. "Don't worry; I've already called his client canceling him for tonight. Tomorrow he will call the others."

"Others?" she asked dumbly, overwhelmed with all the information and looking accusingly at the phone in her hand.

"Yeah, well, now that he broke his leg he won't be able to walk for a while, so he won't be able to work either."

Realization downed and she couldn't help but be glad. She tried to hide her grin, but it was too strong and smug for her to control. He smiled, "You don't have to try to keep it down. You have the right to be happy about this."

"Do I?"

He shrugged still smiling. "I think so. You like him," he pointed out and she opened her mouth to protest but he cut her off. "And he cares about you too. It's just right now he needs a lot of money and his job helps him with that."

She frowned and her eyebrows drew together. "Why does he need that much money? Is he in some kind of trouble?"

"Look, I've already said too much. If you want more answers you'll have to ask Jess. All I can say is that he is a really great guy and that I don't think you realize how much he really hates what he does."

She stared at Matt speechless.

"Okay, I have to go. Take care of him, okay?" he said before heading to the door. Rory kept staring at the white wall ahead of her, still trying to understand everything Matt had just told her. Knowing she wouldn't be able to get to any conclusion at the moment she walked to Jess' room and opened the door extremely carefully so he wouldn't wake up.

His room was very simple, just like she expected. His bed was next to a wall and near to the window, he had a desk with many files and papers scattered over it and there were books everywhere. There was a small wardrobe but it seemed like all his clothes were thrown around the room and she wondered if there were any clothes inside the wardrobe at all. Close to the door there were a few piles of CDs next some more books.

She looked at him sleeping peacefully in his bed. She never thought she would actually see him in his bed; that he would invite her over to his apartment. And truth be told, he hadn't.

She went back to the living room and got herself a chair bringing it to his room and putting it besides his bed so she could watch him. After that she took her high heels off and got a sweatshirt and a pair of sweatpants that hang from the handlers of his wardrobe. She changed into his clothes and put hers on the back of the chair. Then she went to the kitchen and got some cold pizza and soda before going back to his room and sitting besides his bed watching him.

She usually fell asleep just after they had sex, way too tired, so she had never really watched him sleeping. He wasn't built but his muscles were well defined, his face that during the day varied between hard and bored now looked soft and warm, the only thing in him that didn't change in the least was his dark spike hair that gave him a careless independent look. She liked that about him.

She ate the cold pizza and drank her soda watching his chest raise and fall softly, wondering how he could look so vulnerable right now when she was the one feeling vulnerable around him all the time. When she was finished with her snack she put her plate in the sink and went back to his room, gathered his clothes that were all around the room and dropped them on the bed near his feet. She started folding what she guessed were his 'working clothes' which were just normal clothes for most guys but she just couldn't picture him willingly buying them. And then she found a pair of ripped jeans, a black tee with white letters that said 'anti-social' and a Metallica tee.

"I wondered where that was," she heard and turned around to see him with half-opened eyes.

She walked up to him, "Hi."

"Hey. What are you doing here?"

She looked at him in a funny way, thinking maybe he didn't remember the accident, "There was an accident; your leg is broken."

He rolled his eyes, "I know, I remember. Besides, the cast kinda gives it away. I'm asking what are _you_ doing _here_?"

"Oh. Matt called me. He said he had to go to work…"

"And asked if you could come play nurse," he finished for her.

She nodded, "I guess."

Jess sighed and looked around uncomfortable, "Look, you can go now. I woke up and I'm fine. He shouldn't have called you in the first place."

She looked at him shifting her weight from one foot to another, "You want me to call anyone to come over?" she asked avoiding his eyes.

He shook his head.

"Well, if it's just for you to stay alone with a broken leg, then why don't you want me to stay?"

He looked up into her eyes, "You have your own life, you have Tristan living in your house, you have work to do… you don't need to worry about me."

"I'm off of work, right now Tristan must be arriving in Boston and you're not the worst person to spend time with," she half-smiled.

He didn't answer for a minute, then, "You have a new uniform to go to work?" he asked looking pointedly at his clothes that she was wearing.

She blushed embarrassed, "Sorry I borrowed them without asking. Just thought you wouldn't mind…"

He smiled, "I don't. They look good on you."

She glared at him for making her feel uncomfortable and then sat on the chair next to him. "Matt said he'd arrive around three but I'm spending the night anyway. He called tonight's client canceling and told me you'd call the others tomorrow. Uhm… there isn't much food in the fridge so I was thinking of ordering something. Oh, and I folded your clothes," she told him so he could catch up on what happened while he was asleep."

He looked apprehensively to his table to find the papers that lay there still a mess, "You didn't go through those, right?"

"No, I didn't have time to put them in order-"

"Good, don't," he said firmer than he had to.

"O-kay," she answered taken aback.

"On the counter there is a pile with take-out menus. You can choose from there," he offered, changing the subject.

She nodded and went to the kitchen to get the menus. "Okay, so we have Chinese, pizza, Japonese, Italian, Thai and Indian. You're the one sick, you choose."

"Get the Thai. I'm hungry and they are just around the corner."

"Okay, Thai it is," she said dialing to order. When she hang up she announced, "Food will be here in ten."

"You didn't have to come over, you know? I can take care of myself."

"I know, but you don't have to do everything by yourself." He grimaced at her cliché line. She rolled her eyes, "Just let me help a little, okay?"

"Fine."

The doorbell rang and she stood up to get the take out.

"Rory?"

She turned around on his doorway.

"Thank you."

She just smiled and went to answer the door.


	18. The Talk

Chap 18 - …and that's when I realized how much I care about you

* * *

A/N: Okay, so I was a few days late… sorry again. Thanks to everyone who reads and reviews this story. Oh, by the way, Saturday is my B-day so reviews would be a great present. And if I have some free time I may be able to make a surprise?

* * *

Matt unlocked the door and entered his apartment, turning on the lights as he closed the door with his foot. He was surprised to see Rory jump awake on the couch, confused and scared; he couldn't help but chuckle. She looked at him calming down and rubbed her eyes, "I thought you'd get here at three."

"It's three thirty. I'm not that late. Besides, I told you could leave."

She shook her head, "I wanted to stay; I just thought it was later."

He nodded, "Well, you can leave now"

She quietly stood up and went to get her purse. When she was about to leave she finally got the courage to turn to him and ask, "Can I stay?"

He grinned at her as if he knew that was going to happen all along, "Of course."

She sighed in relief, even though she didn't really believe that he would throw her out of the apartment in the middle of the night.

"You sleepy?" he asked as he walked to the opposite side of the counter that divided the kitchen and the living room.

She shook her head and went to sit on a booth. "No, I'm wide awake now. I guess that's all the sleep I'm getting tonight."

He went through the cabinets getting plates and chips, "You know, we never really got the chance to talk until now. I mean, actually talk, not the small talk we had during dinner the other night."

Rory was surprised by that and curious about what he could possibly want to talk about with her. "O-kay, so, we have plenty of time now."

He ignored her for a moment. "You drink coffee?" he asked as he turned on the coffee maker and got two mugs.

"Yeah."

He sighed and turned to her. "Okay," he paused, "well, you see, Jess and I, we grew up together. We cut class together, we fought together, we got a match box apartment together when we couldn't stand living with our parents anymore, we've always watched each others back," he stopped. "He is like a brother to me."

Rory interrupted him, not sure of where he was going with it, "I know all this."

"I figured Jess had told you," he nodded knowingly. "Jess is family to me and even though he's all tough and distant on the outside he just won't let anyone get close cuz he is scared someone will hurt him."

She narrowed her eyes, "Hold on, are you giving me 'the talk'?"

"I'm just saying you should think about what you're doing. I don't know how seriously you're taking this thing with Jess or how you feel about him but you better not use him like all the others to just leave him hanging in the end. He deserves better and I won't just standby, watching."

She was silently nodded and he turned around to walk to his room when he heard her calling him.

"You always give 'the talk' to Jess' girlfriends?"

He shook his head, "There was never anyone to give 'the talk' to."

And with that he left her in an empty kitchen thinking over her relationship with Jess – whatever it was.

* * *

Jess was laying on his bed with his right leg between Rory's, who was cuddling against him with her head on his bear chest.

"Hey, what do you like to do in bed?"

"What? Where did that come from?" she asked a little taken aback by the sudden question.

"Well, we've been sleeping together for what? A little over six months? And you never told me what you like to do so we always do pretty much the same stuff."

She blushed but he didn't see it since her face was pressed against him.

"I don't know. The usual stuff."

"Come one, you must like some things more than others. I just want to know what."

"Jess…" she sighed.

"Are you embarrassed by this conversation?"

"No. It's just that I… I mean… Well…" she started but couldn't finish a single sentence.

He smirked amused. "You are not embarrassed of having sex with me but you're embarrassed over talking about sex with me?"

Still blushing she looked up and glared at him. "Don't make me sound stupid. This situation is already awkward enough for me."

He stroked her hair, "You have no reason to be embarrassed or uncomfortable. It's not like there is any wrong or right.

She bit her lip, "What do _you_ like?"

He smiled with a sigh. He should have known that she wouldn't feel comfortable until he had talked first about the subject. She was always so shy, so insecure. And he didn't mind going first if that would help her; right now he just wanted to make her start talking.

"Uhm… I like many stuff. Sex in general, different positions, oral, some toys. I don't like role-play nor those gags and blind folders; they kinda freak me. Uhm… There s so much stuff I think it's easier if you just ask me?" he offered.

"Ménage à trois?"

"No."

"'No, you haven't' or 'No, you don't like'?"

He observed her expression carefully to see if there would be any change, "No, I don't like."

"Oh," she seemed a little sad thinking of how a woman could possibility compete with two at the same time. "Bondage?" she asked blushing.

"Only if it's very very light. And before you ask I don't go for S&M nor voyeur," he paused, pondering. "Actually, for my kind of job I think I'm pretty traditional."

She raised her eyebrows and he shrugged.

"Any fetishes?"

"Not really. Everyone has their fantasies but I don't have any particular fetish. Any other question?"

She shook her head quietly. "I've never done most of this stuff," she confessed quietly.

"We can try some new stuff if you want," he offered.

She chewed her bottom lip and looked down nervously, "Yeah, sure," she paused. "I just don't know if I'll be any good at these new things."

He looked at her carefully, trying to read her, "Rory, just because I've told you I like these stuff it doesn't mean I want to do them with you." He paused, noticing how wrong it sounded. "That's not what I meant. What I'm saying is that I don't want you doing anything you don't like just because I do. If you're curious or feeling adventurous, then fine, we'll do whatever you want. But if it's just because I like it, then forget it."

That's not exactly how she registered it in her mind, but she nodded anyway, just to end the topic. He didn't believe she actually agreed but he that insisting on the subject right now was pointless; she was stubborn and he would just have to wait and point it out again when the opportunity came.

She bit her lip and looked away. "Can I ask you something?" she asked in a small voice.

He smiled, happy that he was finally getting her to talk to him. "Sure. You can ask anything."

"How many women have you slept with?"

He sighed and closed his eyes, "Do you know that saying 'Careful what you wish for'? It so applies right now," he paused. "I really wanted to get you started on talking to me and now look what you ask me." He looked down at her, "Does it really matter?"

She shrugged, "You said I could ask anything."

"Touché."

"So?"

"You mean in my whole life?"

"Yeah."

"Before and after I became a hooker? One night stands counting? All of them?"

"Yeah."

"I don't really keep count but probably about a hundred, give or take."

She couldn't hide her shock. "Wow."

"Hey, it doesn't matter," he tried to reassure her.

"I feel like a virgin next to you."

He smiled, "I like virgins."

She blushed even more and tried to hide her face between his arm and the mattress, "Yeah, well, not even if I sleep with all the men I know I would stop looking like a virgin next to you."

"Come on, Rory. It's not that bad."

She looked at him with her brows furrowed, "Are you kidding me?"

He shook his head and shrugged, "I don't get it. Why are you mad?"

"I'm not mad," she snapped at him.

His eyebrows rose, "O-kay."

She detangled herself from him, turned in the bed, sitting up with her toes touching the cold floor and sighed. "You're feeling better and Matt will be here in half an hour. I think I should go," she decided standing up and getting her coat that was on the other side of the room. She reached the door and only then he reacted to her sudden change of mood.

"No! Stay!" he asked and she turned looking at him but not moving. "Please?"

She sighed giving in and he moved over a little to make even more room for her. "Come here," he asked after she didn't move towards him.

Hesitantly, she obliged and he held her trying to prevent her from leaving again.

"Look, I know it's not the number you'd like to hear and I know that for some reason it matters to you but I'm honestly telling you it shouldn't. You're amazing and that's what matters."

"As amazing as the other ninety nine?" she asked bitterly.

"I can't change my past just because you don't like it. And to be honest I don't want to cuz no matter how screwed up it was it made me become the person I am today."

Her eyes were getting red, her anger, frustration and sadness showing. "But you had to sleep with so many?"

"Most of them were for work and I needed the money."

She nodded quietly.

"I didn't know that I was going to meet you or that you would make me feel bad about it."

"I'm making you feel bad about it?"

"It's really bothering you and I don't like that," he paused. "Look, think about all the guys that you have slept with – don't tell me the number, just think about them."

"Okay."

"I don't like the idea of you with anyone else, but it doesn't matter cuz it's in your past. You're here with me right now."

"Yeah, but it's not in the past for you. What about your current clients? Just wondering about them… it drives me crazy!" she groaned frustrated.

"Rory…"

"How many are they?" she asked out of the blue but then realized how much she was demanding from him. "I mean, if you know… you don't have to tell me if you don't want to-"

"Eight, nine with you."

She nodded. "I'm sorry but I need to know, do you care at all about how I feel about this?"

"Yes."

"But it just makes no difference?"

"Rory, it's not that simple. It's my job."

"You can find some other job."

"Not one that I can make as much money with my résumé."

"You know if it's about money I can help you."

"I don't want your money," he stated firmly.

"But you want theirs?" she almost accused him.

"It's just a job," he tried to make light of the situation which just filled her with more fury.

"It's not and you know it. I know I can't make you quit but I'm tired of pretending that it doesn't bother me, that I'm fine with it."

He pulled her close and held her tight against him, close enough to whisper in her ear. "I know it bothers you and I hate it. But for now it has to be this way. I've done the only thing I can, I stopped accepting new clients. But that's all I can do right now."

"You don't get new clients anymore?" she confirmed excited, sitting up on the bed.

He smiled, "Nope. It's just these eight and that's it."

She grinned at him, "Since when?"

"Since the day I saw how it affected you. Since I told you I didn't want you paying anymore."

"But you need this money, don't you?"

"My price got a little higher and my schedule isn't so busy anymore. Besides, it was costing _you_ too much."

"Thank you."

He nodded and silence dawned between them. Finally he spoke up, "You know, if my job bothers you so much, then maybe we should talk about it."

She smirked, "Are you suggesting we 'discuss the relationship'?"

"Hey, I was trying to be nice and help cuz I know you'd never bring up the topic just like you'd never tell what you like in sex willingly; but forget about it. If you'll get bitchy and start teasing me, then I can deal with watching you bite your lip, wanting to ask something you don't have the courage to."

Her forehead frowned, "You're serious about it."

He rolled his eyes as if to say "obviously", but didn't say anything.

She rested her head against his chest again but turned her face so she could still look at him. "Are you always going to do this? Don't you want to quit?"

"Of course I want to quit. I've been doing this for too long and these freaks are really getting to my nerves. But I can't quit yet, I need more money before I can stop."

"What this obsession with money you have is all about? Are you in some kind of trouble?" she asked a little concerned.

"I just need it. But you don't have to worry about me," he told her as he stroked her hair and she turned to face the white wall.

With a sigh she confessed, "The thing is, I already do."


	19. The Vacation

**A/N: **I want to thank everyone who offered to beta this story; there are no words to thank you enough. Also, huge thanks to the new beta **MyCaptain **for her help; she beta-ed chaps 17, 18 & 19! Thank you **Charlotte Lee** for the SoL banner she made and that will soon be up in my profile. And finally, thank you to everyone who reads and reviews this story and also the ones who PM me.

* * *

**Chap 19 - I just wanted to be there, by her side

* * *

**

She unlocked the door and entered the apartment announcing, "Hey, I'm home." She paused, listening to what she had just said and quietly corrects, "I mean, your home." She walked to his room to find him laying down, talking on his cell. He gave her a small wave and signaled for her to come in and sit next to him on the bed.

"No, I've told you I can't… I don't know, doctor says about three months… yeah, I know… Look, think of it as my vacation." He rolled his eyes at something the person on the other side of the line said. "If you want I can give you the number of a few guys I know. I'm sure they will be up to your standards… Well, I can't!" he paused. "No! If you want to wait: fine; if you don't, you have James' number. Anyway, I'll call in a few months when I'm back in business… Fine! Bye."

He sighed and then looked at Rory, leaning in to kiss her. "Hey."

"Hey," she greeted back with an uncertain smile. "Problems with your client?"

"They're not used to hearing 'no', that's all."

She bit her lip. "Did you just say you won't be working for the next three months?"

He sighed, "Yeah, well, I went to the doctor this morning after you left and he said it takes about three months for my leg to heal so I decided it's time to take a break. I haven't had vacations in years and it's not like I would be able to work, really."

"You went to the doctor? How? You have a cast on!"

"And that's why it took me half an hour to get out of this building. Seriously, I've never hated stairs so much."

"I could have called a doctor to come here."

"Nah, I needed to go out. I can't stand being locked in this place anymore."

She kept looking at him strangely, her eyebrows slightly narrowed.

He smirked, "What?"

Knowing better than to deny her curiosity she asked, "You can't have sex for the next three months?! I mean, don't you miss it already?"

He chuckled. "I won't even ask how you can just change the subject like that," he said before actually answering her. "Well, don't you? You say you just have me, so how are you dealing with the whole no sex thing these last few days?"

She shrugged, "Well, it's not like I am an energized bunny or like I had a guy on my bed every day before I met you."

He chuckled again.

"I just… I'm more worried about you getting better. The sex can wait," she paused, "What about you? You _are _like an energized bunny."

He grabbed her wrist and pulled it closer so he could kiss it. "I can have sex as long as I'm careful."

"Careful?"

"Yeah, I can't move my leg much. It's more about the discomfort than anything else, really."

She nodded, "So, technically, you can work."

"Technically."

"But you won't," she said, crawling onto him.

"Nope," he shook his head and rested his hands on her hips.

"And that's because…" she took her shirt off and kissed him.

"I need vacations," he said matter-of-factly as he ran his fingers up her ribs to her breasts.

She giggled, "If you need vacations, then why am I straddling you?"

He narrowed his eyebrows and kissed her collarbone, "I didn't say vacation from _you_."

She sighed and looked at him smiling, "Three months free of clients?" she confirmed.

He smiled, kissing her mouth as his fingers undid the zipper of her skirt. "Three months, just you and me."

* * *

"Three days in a row that she has slept here. Soon enough she'll even have a key," Matt commented as he walked to the couch where Jess was laying. 

Jess made a face, "Actually…" he paused, "I gave her mine since I can't leave the apartment and sometimes I'm too lazy to get up from the bed…"

Matt chuckled good heartedly. "Man, I don't mind her staying over all the time, but tell your girlfriend not to leave her high heels and bra in the bathroom."

Jess looked at Matt defensively, "She is not my girlfriend."

"Uh huh," Matt said knowingly and sat on the arm of the couch next to Jess. "Wanna talk about it?"

"There is nothing to talk about," he said, rather snappy.

"Okay, then," Matt paused. "Hey, you know Sean? Of course you remember him; you used to recommend each other to your clients' friends. Well, he saw Rory at that business party in which you two bumped into each other… he thought she was amazing and he told me he'd do her for free with a smirk on. Maybe you should call him and tell him she's available," he suggested in the most innocent tone he could muster, as if he really just wanted to help out a friend. Jess' head shot up so fast that it pained him and he sent a death glare to his best friend that would have many cowering away, but Matt simply grinned and raised his hands, "And so, ladies and gentlemen, I prove my point."

Jess sighed annoyed. "She can't be my girlfriend, okay? I mean, I can't ask her to be my girlfriend when I'm sleeping around for money while she becomes the director of her company. I haven't even gone to college! I'm not from money or 'wellborn' and I have absolutely nothing to offer her, so as you can see I can't be her boyfriend."

"And still she likes _you_."

"Matt, I can't even take her to a nice restaurant or someone might see her with me and put two and two together. It could ruin her career if some of those bitches used it against her. And how would she introduce me to her family? Hey mom this is the gigolo I used to sleep with and now became my boyfriend, do you know if he slept with any of your friends?"

Knowing that it was futile to try to convince him otherwise, he tried to turn the table. "Okay, so you're just fooling around with her? You're not serious about her? She's just a convenient fuck?" Jess looked down, angry at Matt for talking about her like that and for making him think of their relationship as it was. "Even though," Matt continued, "she has spent more time here, taking care of you, than in her own place since your accident."

Jess looked up with sad eyes. "She deserves better."

Matt shrugged. "Maybe. But you can't decide that for her."

Jess shook his head. "Why would she want to be my girlfriend? I mean, who in their right mind would want to be with a guy like me?"

"First of all, where is your self-esteem and the asshole/cocky attitude? And, secondly, from what I gathered she doesn't have many friends, and the ones she has already know about you two. And I know you're a little thick when it comes to relationships, but chicks love to label their relationships."

"And yet she never tried to bring up the subject."

"Jess, we are talking about the girl who bought half the Chinese take out menu—which lasted a whole week, by the way—and still apologized a thousand times 'cause she didn't know what we liked. She would never corner you into a relationship. You know you have to be the one to bring it up."

"I can't… I just can't, okay?"

"Have some pity and come clean with her. I'm sure if you told her what the money is for she'd be more than happy to help you."

"You don't get it. I don't want her help!"

"Well, then, what the hell do you want?"

"I wish I had a different life then I could be with her. But that's simply impossible."

"Well, Romeo, if you keep her in the dark, then this thing will really become impossible."

Jess didn't say anything, so after a moment Matt went on.

"Whatever; keep being an ass. I came here to tell you Miranda's roommate left and that she's kinda sad—and broke—so how would you feel about living alone for a few months until she finds a new roommate?"

Jess looked at his friend and smiled. "Why don't you become her roommate?" he suggested.

"What?!"

"You've been dating for almost two years. Come on, it's the perfect opportunity for you two to start living together."

Matt ran a hand through his hair showing he had already thought about the subject. "I don't know, man. I just don't know. What if I screw up everything?"

Jess rolled his eyes with a smirk, "Don't worry, she won't let you."

Matt threw a cushion at him. "I'm moving out on the weekend if that's okay," he told Jess in an unsure tone, "unless you want me to stay or Rory can't… I can tell Miranda it's gonna take a little longer…"

Jess shook his head. "Nah… Just go, man."

Rory chose that moment to enter the apartment, "Go where?"

Matt turned to look at her, "Miranda's roommate is going away so I'm staying with her for a few weeks."

Jess scoffed, "He's moving in with her."

Rory grinned, "It was about time. You spend more time there than in your own place."

He raised an eyebrow, "Well, look who is talking."

She blushed and went to the kitchen as Jess slapped Matt's arm. Matt rolled his eyes and added, "Not that I'm complaining. I mean, you've been amazing since the accident… you're really the girl for Jess." This time Jess hit him much harder. Matt learned his lesson and stood up so he was out of reach before continuing, "Not that I mean anything by that… By the way, could you not leave your high heels and bra in the bathroom?"

She re-entered the living room holding a mug of coffee, "Sure. I'm sorry I've been in your way since I got here. I know I shouldn't stay over all the time and…"

Matt gave Jess a pointed look before turning to her. "Rory, it's okay. You were not a bother and I'm leaving on the weekend anyway, so feel free to stay over for as long as you want."

She sat by Jess' side, smiled shyly, and murmured, "Thank you."

* * *

She walked out of the subway and down the street with easy, smiling at the leaves falling from the trees. She was getting used to coming to Brooklyn straight from work, and for some reason the neighborhood was growing on her. She entered the building and let herself in Jess' apartment with the key he gave her before going to his room. The room was empty and, as usual, a mess. 

"Jess?" she called walking around the apartment.

"Hey, I just got in the shower. If you want to join…"

He walked to the bathroom door and could hear the water running inside. She smiled, "Nah, I think I'll pass. I'll be waiting in your room."

"Fine."

She went back to his room and sighed, deciding to turn it into a livable place. She started gathering his clothes from the floor and around the room and threw them on his bed before she started folding them. Then she made his bed, which took less than two minutes. Looking around she saw his CDs were organized just like his books on the shelves; the only thing that was still a mess was his papers on the table. Remembering his reaction when he thought she had gone through his papers she looked at them apprehensively, not sure if she really wanted to find out what he was hiding. He slowly walked closer to the table, step by step, as if the papers would get spooked and disappear. She looked back to the door then to the papers and sighed; it was now or never, and she'd rather it be now. She took some magazines and bank papers from the top to find brochures and programs on the bottom. She couldn't believe her eyes. She shook her head but still the same papers stared back at her, shocking her to no end.

Jess entered the room and when he saw Rory standing over the table with an unbelieving expression he knew she had found out. He walked to her, grabbing her by the arm and taking her away from the table. "What do you think you're doing? I've told not to get near those! What part didn't you get? God, can't I trust you to be alone in my room anymore?" he asked, obviously pissed off.

Her expression didn't change though. She looked up at him from her spot on his bed as if seeing him for the first time. She opened and closed her mouth several times before saying in a small voice, "I can't believe you… Why didn't you tell me?"

"It's none of your damn business!" he snapped, still in rage.

She shook her head and put it on her hands, not sure why he was reacting this way. "There are brochures and programs and…" she said a little dizzy, "college papers Jess? Why the big secret?"

"So what, I didn't want you to know. It's my right. Why couldn't you just let it go? But no, you had to go through my stuff behind my back."

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to pry. But you're always obsessing over money and you made such a big mystery over these papers, and I knew they had the answer to your obsession. I just had to know…"

"Well, you've found out so now you can go."

"Jess…"

"What?!"

"Don't throw me out," she pleaded.

He looked at her in defeat and sat on the bed, putting his head on his hands. "God Rory, why couldn't you leave it be?"

She shrugged, "'Cause I care."

There was a moment of silence before he said.

"You can ask, you know?"

"Ask what?"

"How I can think someone like me, with my past and everything, can possibly have a shot at one of those Ivy League universities."

"Someone like you?"

He didn't answer so she went on.

"Well, if you think the way I do, then you understand that someone like you, who is probably the most well-read person I've ever met and who is extremely intelligent, has a very good shot at any university you choose. And if you were a little smarter, then you wouldn't have made it such a big secret and would have let me help you."

He shook his head growling at her, "I don't want your help."

And that was it, the final straw. She was sick of his attitude. "What is your problem? Okay, so I shouldn't have gone through your stuff; I've already apologized. Now could you stop being a stubborn ass?"

"I'm not being an ass. You're the one being irrational," he paused and stood up, broken leg and all. "Okay, so you want to help, right? You want to pay my tuition and shit? Fine, suppose I accepted your money and we were together and everything was just peachy… but then you suddenly realize you could do much better and you meet a successful rich guy for whom you fall in love. Well, where does that leave me exactly? Oh, yeah… jobless, penniless and still with no education. So let's just enjoy the moment and wait until you move on to the next guy, okay?"

She shook her head and looked down. For someone who was always so confident he certainly had issues too. "You know it's not like that to me; I'm not _waiting_ for the next guy. As far as I know we are both here and we have this complicated, screwed up relationship but we care about each other and so far that's been enough. Now, about the money, if you think I would give you something just to take it back I have a solution. I'll just transfer the whole money at once to your account; this way if things don't work out between us you can still finish college."

"It's too much money, Rory."

"I have the money and you could make good use of it. Why not?"

He shook his head, "Thank you for the offer, really, but I can't accept. It's too much."

"And when will you have enough money to put an end to your job and start studying what you want?"

He sighed, "I don't know… hopefully in a year."

"Okay, I have a new proposal then-"

"Rory, I don't want your money."

"Just listen to me, okay? Matt is moving out and you'd have to stay here, alone, paying twice the rent, living ways from the city—where you do most of your work—and your building doesn't have an elevator." At that he just gave her an odd look but she went on. "So, why don't you move in with me instead? This way you are rent free. You won't have expenses besides clothes and such, and we both know you don't spend money on those. And I wouldn't be giving you money; just helping you out," she rationalized.

He was silent for a moment. "We'd be living together."

She shrugged, "Well, yeah, there is that."

"I'd still be working."

She sighed, "If that's what you want."

"How can you cope with that?"

"Guess I'll find out… right?"

He smiled appreciatively at her, "Right."

"Besides, you still have three months of vacation. I'll worry about it when the time comes," she paused. "So that's a 'yes'? You're moving in with me?"

He grinned and nodded before something came to him, "Huh. You'll be the first girl I'll share a place with."

She chuckled, "I guess I should feel special."

He stepped closer to her, his lips only an inch away from hers, "You should… not just for that, but you should."


	20. The Moving In

_**Thank you to**_: **Hollowgirl22**, **helaluvE**, **micyaya**, **Charlotte** **Lee**, **IluvJess**, **dragon** **dreamer3**, **udon'tknowmebutiknowme**, **ShaolinQueen**, **XoXoLiteratiLoveroXoX**, **olina** (anon), **campkgurl**, **Winny** **Foster**, **Poison**-**Girl**-**UK**, **litme**, **Squealing** **Lit**. **Fan**, **lukkygrl08**, **Opy**, **lillitgirlx2**, **kisstommyg**, **ggfan** (anon), **readingfreak101**, **XxXDrama** **QueenXxX**, **Wizard**. (anon),**Curley**-**Q**, **GrlWithoutAName**, **ilovejessssss**, **LosingTrack**, **pam** **halliwell**, **EvilSmirk6**, **LorLukealways**, **RoRyJeSsAdDiCt**, **mo** (anon), **Psyc0gurl0**, **Sharon** (anon), **Fallen** **Angel5297**, **crescent** **mo0n** **19** (anon), **Just** **A Girl** **Of** **the** **Hollow** **x3**, **NERD1144**, **E**-**rizzel**, **ApplesAndRoses**, **alexia** (anon), **uvt** (anon), **Michela**.**77**, **Keiko** **Noriko**, **StoryofGreen**, **GothicSorceressRikku15**, **Lizzy** **likes** **the** **hot** **guy**, **JPNeverlosestheButterflies**, **whoisBrett**, **kaypgirl**, **Joy** (anon), **caipi**, **Courtney**-**chan1**, **Genne**, **Katherine **(anon), **hijinx400**, **stormbreaker830**, **Dahlia **(anon) for the reviews.

_**Special thanks**_ to **MyCaptain** for the beta.

* * *

**Chap 20**** – It's Always You Who Understands Me from Beginning to End **

* * *

She was sitting on her living room floor when she opened the last box with his belongings. She would pull every single item out and hold it in front of him, waiting for him to point either to the pile on her right or on her left. She held a plain black faded tee and he pointed to her left; she held up a copy of _Oliver_ _Twist_ and he pointed to her right; she showed him a hunter green army shirt and again he pointed to her right; she held up a gray Nirvana tee and he pointed to her left, but instead she threw it on her lap.

"I thought there were only two piles here."

She shrugged, "I've just created a third one."

"And that is…"

"The stuff that you don't want but I do."

He chuckled. "Oh, that pile," he mocked.

She glared at him and then rolled her eyes. "Okay, that's it. We've gone through all of your belongings. I'll send the stuff you don't want to some shelter or something tomorrow and we can start organizing your things tonight."

"Right. By the way, I tried to put my shoes in your closet, at that special space you said you had made for me? Well, it didn't fit."

"How come?" she asked, feigning surprise.

"I'd be surprised if you could fit two pairs of shoes there."

She made a face, tilting her head from one side to the other. "Do you really need more space?"

He chuckled at her difficulty of sharing space with his shoes. "Yeah, I need more space," he said as though he was talking to a five-year-old. "And I also need space for my clothes."

"That's not a problem."

"Really?" he asked disbelieving.

"Of course! You don't have half the stuff I do. Your clothes should fit in my closet just fine. Now, about your shoes—that's a different matter. Maybe we could keep them under the bed."

"Why do we keep _your_ shoes under the bed?"

She gasped, "How can you say that? They need to have their own rightful place. They aren't just any shoes, you know?"

"Neither are mine," he defended pointedly.

"Fine, I'll find somewhere else to put some of my shoes," she paused. "So this is it. Your books and CDs are in your shelves, your personal stuff is your personal place, your clothes and shoes are the only thing missing." She took a key from her pocket and handed it to him, "So, this is officially your home."

He sighed and looked around then at her, "Yeah, this is home."

* * *

He answered the ringing phone on the third ring. "Hello?"

There was a silence for a moment then a female voice apologized, "I'm sorry, it's the wrong number."

"Wait!" He asked, "Are you looking for Rory?"

"Uhm... yeah."

"She isn't back from work yet, but she should be home soon. Do you want to leave a message?"

"Yes. No. Actually, I'd rather talk to you. So, how've you been? Better question: who are you?"

Jess had a puzzled expression on his face even though he could not see the crazy woman he was talking to. "I'm Jess. And you are…"

"Lorelai."

"Lorelai…" he repeated, the name sounding familiar. "Lorelai," he finally said with realization. "You're Rory's mother."

"And I see she told you about me. However she hasn't told me who _you_ are. So, you care to tell me what is _your_ relationship with me daughter?"

He paused not sure of what the answer was. 'In case of doubt, be vague,' he thought before answering, "We are friends."

He could hear her chuckling on the other end of the line. "You're seriously feeding me the lamest line ever? I'd rather have you say, 'I'm not sure.'"

He shrugged even though she couldn't see, "I'm not sure." And after a moment he added, "And that's actually the truth."

"See, much better," she praised. "Now, Jess, can I ask you what you are doing in my daughter's apartment when she isn't home herself?"

"Well, it's a funny story…"

"Cool, I'll get the popcorn then. I love funny stories."

He chuckled. "You want the long, inventive version or the short, truthful version?"

"Usually, I'd rather hear the first but since you're the first guy to answer my daughter's phone in the longest time I'll go with the latter."

"I broke my leg, my building doesn't have an elevator, and my roommate was leaving, so she offered me to stay with her for a while."

"So, you're living together…"

"Not really…"

"Jess…"

"Technically," he relented.

And suddenly she was screaming like a mad woman. "I can't believe her. How could she start living with a boy and not tell me! I had jokes to make and teasing to do! Doesn't she have any pity on me? I mean, this is major! She is sharing a shoe box well decorated overpriced apartment with a boy!"

"I'm not exactly a boy," he interrupted in vain.

"I mean, you'd expect that your only daughter, the fruit of your loins, the person who caused you sixteen hours of excruciating pain would at least have the decency to call and say, 'Hey mom, I invited a boy to come live with me.' But oh no, that's too much to ask!"

He cleared his throat and sat on the couch, "Uhm… not that I want to interrupt-"

"She used to tell me everything! Did you know she called me crying when she was in college and Mr. Cat died?"

He narrowed his eyes, "No."

"Well, she did."

"I didn't know she had a cat."

"It wasn't a cat; it was a fish."

"Called Mr. Cat?"

"It seemed like a good name," she defended. "That way the real cats would think twice before going after him." There was an awkward silence and finally Lorelai relented, "Fine, it wasn't the smartest name but it sounded like a good idea at the time."

He chuckled. "Hey, I'm sorry Rory hasn't told you anything but if it helps any it's been only a week and she's always busy with work. I mean, even when she's home she's working."

"Yeah, I know how she is," Lorelai agreed sadly. "Wait, what did you say your name was?"

He answered hesitantly, "Jess."

"Jess? You mean Jess Jess."

"Jess Jess?" he asked confused.

"Yeah, _that_ Jess!" she said impatiently as if it explained it all.

"I don't know who _that_ Jess is so I don't think so."

"Okay, do you know my son, Will?"

"Oh, yeah, how is he doing?"

"Then yeah, you're _that _Jess. And he's fine by the way. He wouldn't stop talking about you when he got home. I think you're his hero now."

"Poor boy," he commented. "If he only has me to look up to, then he really is in trouble."

Lorelai chuckled. "Okay, so since you're talking to my daughter much more often than I have, how is she doing?"

"She is fine. Work is driving her crazy as always and she has all these important meetings all the time now that she's the CEO of the east coast."

"She is? God, she has wanted this promotion for so long," Lorelai commented sad that Rory hadn't told her anything about it.

Jess flinched, regretting what he had said. "Well, yeah, she was just promoted and she was a little shaken up over it, like, 'Now that I have everything that I've ever wanted what am I gonna do?' But now she is doing fine."

"I still wish she would have told me."

Jess feels uncomfortable, not sure of what to say. "She talks about you all the time. I think she really misses you."

"Oh, she talks about me? Really? What does she say? That I'm beautiful and funny and the best mom ever? I mean, of course she talks about me… She better talk about me or she'll be getting the ugly baby Christmas card this year."

Jess couldn't believe this woman. He chuckled and shook his head. "She says you're amazing and that she misses you and Will and your husband…"

"Hey Jess, you have plans for Thanksgiving?"

"Uhm… no."

"Good. Then you two should come spend it with us. I really miss my daughter and now I can't wait to meet you either."

"I'm not sure…" he started, rubbing the back of his neck.

"Come on, I won't take no as an answer. Tell Rory that I called and that I'll be expecting you two on the holiday."

"Okay, I'll give her your message. Though I can't promise anything about Thanksgiving."

"Believe me, you'll come."

* * *

Rory entered her apartment with closed eyes and a groan. She started cursing and Jess, who was laying on the couch reading a book, sat up with wide eyes and watched the scene unfolding before him. Rory opened her eyes and cursed one last time. She stepped out of her high heels and put her folder and purse on the counter before sighing.

"So, had fun in the office?" Jess asked sarcastically and she couldn't help chuckling as she rolled her eyes. She walked to the couch and sat besides him.

"Yeah, you could say that. Today we lost a deal… it will cost us about 40 million, and though it someone else's fault I'm the one who will have to deal with it."

He blinked, "Wow."

"Yeah. I know. Today really sucked."

"Okay, tell you what. We'll order some food and drink some wine and talk; in no time you won't even remember that you're a workaholic," he said mockingly.

She rolled her eyes. "Fine. What do you want to order?"

"Italian?"

"Fine by me. You call, I'll go get the wine," she said handing him the phone. He called the Italian place they always ordered from – even before they were living together – and asked her favorite. A few minutes later she came back from the kitchen with two glasses and a bottle of red wine. She served them both before taking a sip. "God, I really needed a drink."

He grabbed her legs, put them on his lap, and started massaging her feet. "Fuck, you're tense." He paused. "Well, you're always tense," he corrected himself as an afterthought. "So, tell me more about your day."

She shrugged and continued sipping her drink, "There isn't much to tell. I've attended a boring meeting, lost 40 million, tried to explain to my employees for the tenth time how they are supposed to do their work… same old, same old. Except that I'm getting a massage now, that's new," she told him with a smile. "What about you? What did you do?"

He made a face, "There isn't all that much to do when you have a cast on your leg and you are locked in an apartment. I just finished organizing my stuff. Oh, and your mom called."

"Really? What did she say?"

"She was surprised when I answered the phone and apparently Will told her all about me so she wants both of us to go spend Thanksgiving with her."

"Oh," she exclaimed, narrowing her eyes.

"Hey, chill, I don't have to go."

"Who will you spend Thanksgiving with?"

He shrugged, "Don't know yet. It doesn't matter; I usually spend it alone anyways."

"Then maybe you could spend it with me and my family?" she suggested.

"Are you sure about that? I mean, for sure they will have questions about what I am doing there."

"No matter if you go or not they will have questions. Besides, my mom must be dying to meet you. It seems Will wouldn't stop talking about you when he got home. I guess you have a fan."

"You should give him better role models," he advised.

"He's fine with the ones he has," she assured. "So, you're going to spend the holiday with my family," she tried out the sentence.

"That's what it seems." He paused. "We're really serious, huh?"

"If you're going to meet my mom you have no idea. If you survive this holiday we can survive anything."

He looked at her a little scared. "You really know how to tranquilize a guy," he mocked. "Seriously, though, is she that bad?"

Rory laughed. "No, she's just… unique. You'll see." The interphone buzzed and Rory stood up to answer it before grabbing some money on her purse and getting the food. She placed the pasta on the coffee table and went to the kitchen to get some plates and silverware. When she sat down besides him again she looked at his worried expression and chuckled.

"Don't worry. I promise it'll be an unforgettable holiday."

"Funny but that doesn't exactly calm me down."

"Well, then, just take comfort that I'll be there to protect you."

"Why would I need protection?" he asked slightly scared.

She looked at him innocently, "No reason."

He just groaned, "God, what did I get myself into?"

* * *

They laid in bed silently facing each other.

"Rory…"

"Yeah?"

"Your mother asked me who I was."

"You're Jess," she answered as though it was the most obvious thing in the world.

"No, she asked who I was to you."

Rory was silent for a moment, thinking of the magnitude of the situation. "What did you answer her?"

"I told her I wasn't sure."

She nodded quietly.

"So… what are we?"

She looked up at him, "What do you want this to be?"

"Don't turn the table; I asked you first."

She bit her lip nervously and looked away. "I don't know. I guess some people would say we are… dating?" she asked tentatively.

He smiled. "Are you included in that list?"

She shrugged. "I don't know. Do you want me to be? I mean, with your job and all…"

He sat up resting his weight on his forearm as he turned to look at her. "I know my job is the elephant in the room most of the time and I know it bothers you a lot – and you have every right to be bothered by it. And that's partially why I'm asking you 'what are we,' 'cause you're the one who can decide it and tell me where we stand in this mess."

She also sat up, mimicking his position. "You talk like I'm the only one who should be deciding things. What about you? I mean, what do you want? Is this living arrangement just an easy way to save money and keep an 'open relationship' or whatever or do you want something else?"

He sat up and leaned against the headboard, adjusting his cast. "Okay, I guess it's been overdue to put the cards on the table. Before anything I want to make it clear that even though I hate my job it's important to me; I want to go to college but I don't want to own it to anyone; I want to do it by myself. I know it may sound crazy and maybe you can't understand it but it's just something I have to do," he paused and she nodded. "Okay, so, about us… last week you freaked out about the number of women I've slept with. And I may have slept with quite a few but I've never had _this_ with any of them. I like you; simple as that. And I'd love to have you as my girlfriend but I know that is impossible because of my job. So I'm just hoping we can keep what we have while I'm here." He finished and sighed before focusing on her again, "Okay, what about you?"

"Well, I also want to keep what we have; I like you. A lot, by the way," she said shyly before continuing. "And I want to be your girlfriend. I mean, of course your job bothers me; it almost drives me crazy. But not being with you is not an option anymore, so I'll just have to learn how to cope with it until you finally quit." She paused before asking, "You'll quit, right?"

He smiled and nodded, "Eventually."

"Okay, good," she nodded smiling. "So, you're my boyfriend then?"

"That's what it seems," he smirked.

"And I'm your girlfriend."

"I'd think so," he got closer to her.

"And we are dating."

"That's what a boyfriend and a girlfriend do"

"Okay, then come here and warm my feet, boyfriend."

And he happily obliged.

* * *

**Spoiler:**

"Maybe you should tell her how you feel," Matt suggested.

"Man, you sound like a girl!"

"I blame Miranda. She makes me talk about my feelings," he complained.

"You're so whipped!"

"Says the guys who is all insecure 'cause his girl didn't invite him to a dinner party."


	21. The Hidden Invitation

**Chap 21  


* * *

**Jess woke up and rubbed his eyes. One of the very few things he liked about his job was that he never had to wake up early. And, now that he was on 'vacation', he would spend half of the morning just sleeping before getting out of bed. He glanced at the clock on the nightstand that read 10:24 and slowly started moving to stand up before stretching and moving to the kitchen.

He would usually get some fruit and eat it while walking through the apartment, turning on the TV or the radio, or getting some magazine to read. He didn't like to sit in a small kitchen just to eat alone. He saw a pile of mail on the coffee table and sat in front of it, putting the paper he was holding next to him and sorting the letters. While he was chewing an apple and doing his task he saw something that caught his eye: an invitation. He opened it, too curious for his own good. It was addressed to "Rory and Accompanier" so he assumed it wouldn't be such a big problem to explain why he had violated her mail. It was an invitation to a dinner party thrown by her company and meant for the heads of every department and section so they could become, at the very least, acquaintances. He knew it was the company's way of saying, "We put forth the effort to have an amicable and respectful environment so you can work as a team," to show their good qualities when a business magazine wrote some article about them. He knew for sure that Rory would have to go; however, the due date to RSVP was only a day away and she still hadn't told him a word about it.

He sat on the couch, disappointed, upset, and feeling unworthy. They might be living together and they might call each other girlfriend and boyfriend, but it didn't really change their relationship. They could be girlfriend and boyfriend, but still it had to be a secret. He felt like a teenager, hiding his crush on a girl. The only difference was that he had never felt something like that when he actually was a teenager. He sighed. So, she was still embarrassed of him. He couldn't blame her, really. He wouldn't proudly present his girlfriend to his co-workers if she were a hooker and he was some businessman, especially if he knew she probably had slept with at least one person in the room for money. It was irrational, but still, it didn't hurt any less.

He stared at the pale colored invitation as though it was the one at fault. He had to talk to someone about it but at the moment she was out of question. The first person that came to his mind wasn't exactly the best option or the most fit to the job, but he didn't know many people besides his clients. And hell, he wasn't exactly in the position of being picky. After all, beggars can't be choosers.

* * *

Matt was walking around the small living room, analyzing everything he saw in the obviously expensive apartment as he heard Jess telling his drama that sounded more like a chick flick with the roles reversed. When Jess had finally finished telling his tale he sighed and suggested, "Maybe you should tell her how you feel."

Jess narrowed his eyes and shook his head, "Man, you sound like a girl!"

Matt shrugged and complained, "I blame Miranda. She makes me talk about my feelings."

"You're so whipped!"

"Says the guys who is all insecure 'cause his girl didn't invite him to a dinner party."

Jess glared at his best friend, "It's not just any dinner party. It is really important to her career. And she is embarrassed of taking me with her."

"You don't know that," Matt protested.

"Can you think of any other reason for her to not tell me about it?"

Matt was quiet for a minute then shrugged. "Just because I can't think of anything doesn't mean there isn't anything else." He shook his head and sat in front of his friend. "Come on, Jess. You know I'm always on your side, but even if she really doesn't want to take you to this thing 'cause she's ashamed, well, you have to see her side on this. I know it sounds horrible, but if that's her reason I can understand why she hasn't told you anything."

Jess leaned back on the couch, looking at the ceiling. "The worst part is I understand it, too. It just sucks to be her dirty little secret."

"I think she doesn't feel much better about being just another woman in your bed either."

"I know," Jess said, unmoving. "She isn't just _another _one, but she can't be the _only_ one either," he sighed. "What am I gonna do?"

Matt shrugged, not sure if it was supposed to be a hypothetical question. "Tell her you found the invitation and that you noticed the RSVP is just a day away. She will have to say something to that and then you'll just have to see how things go from there."

Jess raised an eyebrow. "That's actually not a bad idea. Maybe your 'relationship talks' with Miranda are good for something."

Matt scoffed, "I wish they were good to _my_ relationship with her."

"Problems in paradise?"

"Kind of. She is just a year away from graduating, she is great at what she does but she can't find an internship and it would really help her to add it to her résumé. She is going nuts, worried that once she graduates she will have to go back home, leave the city and everything and that has caused a few discussions."

"Discussions like you telling her she doesn't have to work on what she has spent years studying to be happy?"

"I hate it when you put it like that."

"Do you remember when you two broke up 'cause she said you weren't being supportive? Well, either you change really fast or it will happen again."

Matt sighed. "Fine, I'll do my best."

Rory entered the living room and took of her shoes, already talking, "Hey Jess, I was thinking of ordering some Chinese. It's been a while since—" She stopped mid-sentence when she noticed Matt was sitting on her coffee table. "Oh, Matt, hey."

"Hey, Rory. Sorry to be invading your apartment but Jess called—"

She shook her head and waved a hand, "It's his apartment, too."

Matt raised an eyebrow to Jess who didn't respond.

"So, what were you guys talking about?" Rory asked them.

"Matt and Miranda are having some problems in their relationship," Jess answered before Matt had the chance to say anything.

"Really? Why?" she paused. "I mean, it's none of my business. If you don't want to tell me…"

"It's fine. She can't find an internship and she is worried about having to move back to her home town and apparently Jess thinks I'm not being supportive enough."

"Huh. And what is her major?"

"Journalism."

Jess looked at Rory, suddenly aware that she knew someone who could help Miranda, but who also was a ghost Rory had no desire to let back in her life.

"And where is she studying?"

"NYU. A year away from graduating."

"Okay," she said while grabbing her cell. She dialed a number and sat beside Jess. Someone answered on the other line and the two men watched her side of the conversation. "Hey Paris, how are you doing? …Yeah, I know, I miss you, too. We should see each other some time… Yeah, I know, I've seen him. He stayed with me for a few weeks… He told you? Fine, we'll talk about that some other time… Yeah, I kind of have a favor to ask. I know this girl, she studies at NYU, she is a year away from graduating and she needs an internship… I don't know but I think she might be good… Please? I'll owe you one. Okay, good, thanks Par." Rory hung up and the guys were staring at her. "Okay, I got Miranda an interview. I can't guarantee the job—that depends on how good she is. Paris is very demanding."

Matt stared at Rory with wide eyes, "Wow, thanks, Rory."

Jess was a little more worried. "So, how do you know this Paris?"

"She is a high school friend. We went to college together. Tris, Par and I were always close."

Jess just nodded.

"So, not that I'm not very appreciative of your help but just out of curiosity: where is this job?"

"Oh, Paris is the editor of the _New York Times_."

"What? Oh fucking God, you gotta be kidding me!"

Rory chuckled. "That's why I warned you that she is demanding. She is hard to please and an extreme perfectionist, but she isn't all that bad."

"Do you have a single friend that isn't extremely wealthy and successful?"

Rory shrugged. "Money isn't everything and wealth and success are relative. I will certainly never be half as wealthy as my ex-fiancé but I don't care in the least about that. And although some of the people I know are well-recognized in their career, they have a very screwed up personal life. I don't consider that very successful."

"True," Matt agreed. "Anyway, thanks for your help. I'll give Miranda your number so she can call you to get the interview information."

"Sure."

"Okay, I have to go," he said, standing up and going to the door. He turned and said, "By the way, Jess wants to talk to you." Then he left before Jess could glare or curse him.

Rory turned to Jess with a frown. "So, what do you want to talk about?"

"It's nothing. Matt was just being annoying."

"I really doubt he would say something like that for no reason."

He sighed and rolled his eyes before grabbing the invitation and handing her.

She narrowed her eyes. "Where did you find that?"

"It was with the mail," he paused. "I just didn't know you had been invited to a dinner party. It just surprised me."

"It's only been a few days and I'm still not sure if I'm going."

"It's important for you to go. All the great minds were invited."

"Do you want to go?" she asked in a small voice.

He shook his head. "You shouldn't ask out of guilt or pity. You're supposed to RSVP by tomorrow and you still hadn't told me anything."

"I've already RSVP-ed. I told them I couldn't go."

"What? But what about your job?"

"You're still in no conditions to go and I'm pretty sure you'd hate to spend the night at one of those boring parties, anyway. Besides, right now they can't afford to fire me; I'm one of the best at what I do."

He tilted his head and smiled. "So, you really weren't planning on going."

She shook her head. "Of course not. Otherwise I would have talked to you sooner."

He smiled and offered her his hand, "Come here." She took his hand and he pulled her into his lap.

* * *

"Hey, you ready to go?"

"Yeah, I just have to pass on the bank on our way out of the city to take some money," she answered, going through her purse like she was looking for something.

He grabbed their bags and set them next to the door. "Explain again why you need all these clothes to just spend a holiday with your family?"

She stopped going through her purse and looked at him. "Okay, so say we are walking hand-in-hand in the middle of the square and it starts raining? I'll need a similar outfit, a casual one that I can wear at all times. And then we're invited to a dinner party with my grandparents or something? So I need at least two outfits so I can actually decide instead of being trapped into using the one I brought—"

He cut her, "I don't have clothes for a dinner party if your grandparents invite us."

"Don't worry, I've already packed a couple of outfits to you, too."

"You what?" he asked unbelieving.

She shrugged. "I just thought it would be better safe than sorry."

He shook his head. "You're completely insane."

She narrowed her eyes at him.

He rolled his eyes. "Fine, if it will make you stop looking at me like that I'll even drop the question about why you need three bags for a weekend."

She smiled at him and kissed him on the cheek. "I knew you would understand," as though he had actually understood it.

"So," he cleared his throat and tried to sound as non-committal as possible, "is there anything I should know about your mother?"

She smiled knowingly. "Oh, not much—just that she is very protective and all of her society, very snobby. She is also slightly insane, but she was only admitted once and it was for a little short time…"

He turned to her with huge eyes and she couldn't stop laughing. He glared at her and then stepped towards her, tickling her mercilessly. "Sorry, sorry, sorry."

He raised his eyebrows asking her the real answer. She sighed. "She is really cool and funny. She was born in high society but got pregnant with me when she was sixteen and ran away. She worked as a maid and her up to become a manager so she is very simple and appreciates hard working people. She doesn't usually judge people but she can read them very well. She is always joking around but know when to take what she is saying seriously. Never, ever call her ma'am. Hold your own but never disrespect her." Rory was silent, thinking for a second, "I think that's it."

"That's all?" he asked sarcastically.

"Yeah."

He stared at her for a moment, "She sounds interesting."

"You'll see," Rory paused. "She's even more interesting in person," she promised.

**Spoiler:**

"So you're the stud that is living with my daughter."

He winced. "I definitely wouldn't put it that way."

"Why? Aren't you a stud? Or you're not living with my daughter?"

"Why do I feel like this is a trick question somehow?"

* * *

**A/N:** Thank you to **My Captain** for the beta and please **review**!


	22. The Mother

**Chap 22**

* * *

"So you're the stud that is living with my daughter."

He winced. "I definitely wouldn't put it that way."

"Why? Aren't you a stud? Or are you not living with my daughter?"

"Why do I feel like it's a trick question somehow?"

"Do you always answer a question with a question?"

"I don't know—do you?"

Lorelai smiled. "Rory, you found one that could actually keep up with me in banter. It was about time."

Rory smiled, "I'm glad he passed your test."

"My first test," Lorelai corrected then looked at Jess. "Okay, now on the floor and play dead," she said in all seriousness. He just glared at her and she shrugged, "It was worth a try."

* * *

Both women watched Jess and Will playing in the park a few feet away from them. Lorelai took a sip of her coffee.

"So, what's the deal with him?" she said, motioning at Jess with her coffee.

Rory narrowed her eyes. "What do you mean?"

"What is going on between you two?"

Rory smiled and blushed, looking down. "We're dating."

"That's nice, Ror, but I'm asking, 'What are you not telling me?' here."

Rory shook her head a little tensely and suddenly became alert. "What are you talking about?"

Lor put a hand on her daughter's back, trying to tranquilize her, "Hey, calm down, we're just talking," she said, taking another sip of her coffee to give time for Rory to feel more at ease. Then she started again, careful with her words, "Baby, I love you and I know you – it comes with the job. But I'm not naïve or stupid, I could see that you were hiding something even before you got here."

Rory sighed sadly and looked down, "I think I should go."

Lorelai put a hand on her daughter's leg to keep her in place. "Funny, I think you shouldn't. I think there is something that is bothering you. If you are not sharing with me then it's huge. You should know by now that I'm your mother, I love you, and I'll always be by your side, no matter what."

Rory shook her head, "Not in this."

Lorelai smiled and nodded to the other woman's hands, "Drink some of your coffee; everything looks better with coffee." Rory did as she was told and Lorelai repeated her first question, "What's the deal with him?"

Rory opened then closed her mouth, then opened it again, but no sound came out. "I don't know how to say it," she burst out, frustrated.

"Just talk to me, baby. Does he drink? Drugs?"

Rory shook her head, "No, no, nothing like that."

"He looks like a nice guy. Is he married or engaged…?"

Rory smiled bitterly, "No, not really. It's not that exactly."

Lorelai nodded, then there was another woman. "Tell me, what is it like, then?"

"It's—it's embarrassing. The whole situation is…. Everything is so screwed up, mom," she shook her head helpless. "I just- I can't-"

"Ror, what's happening? What's so embarrassing?"

The younger woman sighed, "You remember when you asked me what he did for a living and I told you he rented things?"

"Yeah," Lorelai looked at her suspiciously. "Rory, is he a dealer or something… Is it illegal?"

Rory bit her lower lip and shook her head, "Nothing that harms anyone."

"Rory, the suspense is killing me here," the older woman exhaled.

"Mom, he rents his body: he is a hooker."

For once, Lorelai was speechless. She just stared at Rory in complete shock as though she would go on and explain that it wasn't what she had just heard; but it didn't happen. "How? I mean, why?"

Rory raised a shoulder in a half shrug as though it didn't really bother her. "He needed money to survive and all that and with his childhood it's a miracle he even got a GED. He raised himself and he did a good job at it; he's a good guy and he's so smart you wouldn't believe it. But…" she continued in a small voice, "he sleeps with other women for money."

Lorelai shook her head as though trying to clear it, "But now that you two are living together, he stopped it, right?"

She shook her head embarrassed. "No, he's still working and saving money."

"Saving money? To what?"

"He wants to go to school but he refuses to take my money. The only help he lets me give him is to let him live with me rent free. Other than that he doesn't take a penny from me."

"But he is going to stop, right?"

"Eventually. When he gets all the money he needs."

"And you're okay with that?" Lorelai asked, skeptical.

Rory looked at Jess and Will playing and laughing by the swings. She stared straight ahead at where they were, answering as best as she could: "I'm in love with him."

* * *

Rory and Jess were talking and laughing on the couch when Lorelai arrived from the Inn. "Hey Rory, I have good and bad news; what do you want first?"

"Bad news."

"You'll have to go to your grandparents' Thanksgiving party."

Rory threw her head back and groaned. "The good news better be really good."

"Oh, it is; I won't have to go to your grandparents' Thanksgiving party."

Rory narrowed her eyes, "How come?"

"Well, I've told your grandmother you were going to visit her. By the way, I think you better go now before it gets dark and they trap you into having dinner with them."

Rory sighed. "Why would you do that to me?"

"'Cause she wanted me to have dinner with them and as soon as your name came up they totally forgot about little ol' me."

Rory rolled her eyes, "Fine. Let's go, Jess."

Lorelai looked at her pointedly. "Do you think it's wise to take him to the wolves in his first visit for no reason whatsoever?"

"Where else would he stay?"

Lorelai shrugged as if the thought had just passed by her mind, "Here, with me."

Rory and Jess looked at each other. She gave him a look asking if he was going to be okay and he squeezed her hand and nodded. Rory put on her coat and took her purse, giving him one last look before leaving the house.

Lorelai looked at him. "So, now it's just you and me."

Jess sat in front of her. "That's what it seems."

"You know, I've been meaning to talk to you. Rory hasn't told me much about you."

"There isn't much to tell."

"Oh, come on! Of course there must be something."

"Not really. But you can ask me whatever you want to."

She smirked. "So, tell me about your job," she said almost innocently. He knew better.

"I can tell you that I'm a businessman that works renting things – not exactly cars – and who can make a living with that and I wouldn't be lying." Lorelai didn't say anything and he continued. "But I wouldn't be telling you the truth either. Rory told me you had her when you were sixteen. You're not stupid and I'm not going to treat you like you are. I'm guessing Rory told you something."

"I'd rather hear it from you. So, what do you do for a living?"

He sighed. "I sleep with women for money," he said simply.

She didn't look shocked; she just went on with her questions. "And how long have you been doing that?"

He was surprised by the question, but there was no reason not to answer it. "First time I did it I was twenty two, but only a year later I started taking it seriously."

"Do you like it?"

"At the beginning I did, but then it became pretty clear I was nothing more than a toy, a hobby. I haven't enjoyed my job in a long time, especially after Rory."

She nodded, "You know what you do is dangerous."

"Always safe, never had a slip. Check my blood every three months just to be sure. Never had anything."

"How much do you charge?"

"At least 700 a night."

Lorelai opened her wallet and got the money, putting it on the coffee table between them. "Would you sleep with me?"

It was now his turn to be shocked. "Is that a trick question?"

"The money is on the table."

"No!"

She stared at him. "Why?"

He stared at her, thinking it was obvious. "You are my girlfriend's mother!"

"So what?"

"I'm not taking new clients, just keeping the old ones."

"It'd be a one time thing, no one would ever know."

"I wouldn't do that to Rory."

"Okay, let me put it this way: either you sleep with me and Rory never finds out about it, or you refuse and I'll tell her you hit on me."

He stared at her in disbelief. "I can't believe you. She is your daughter! I had a screwed up mother, but this… You really are a crazy fucking bitch! I'll go get my stuff and leave. Tell her whatever you want to."

He stood up and took a few steps towards the stairs when he heard his name. "Jess," Lorelai called out to him in a tone that reminded him of how she had talked to him on the phone before they met face-to-face. He turned around and stared at her in silence. "Have some coffee with me? I'd like to get to know you better."

He narrowed his eyes and looked at her as though she was the most insane person in the planet. "Are you crazy?"

"No, but I think you are crazy about my daughter."

He relaxed. "It was a test."

"Rory has been hurt way too much. She may be sharp when it comes to business, but people can easily take advantage of her when it comes to relationships. She is serious about you but I wasn't sure if you were about her. If you had shady intentions you'd have accepted my proposal as long as I didn't tell her anything; and I honestly thought you'd crack when I said I would tell her you had come on to me if you didn't sleep with me but I'm really glad about how you reacted."

"Do you always do that to her boyfriends?"

"Nope. They are usually morons so I just get them confused and scare them away in the first hour or so. But you can hold your own so you went to test Level II."

"Are there any more tests I should be aware of?"

"Only the quiz we'll go through over coffee and then I can give you my seal of approval." She stood up and went to the kitchen; he followed her. A few minutes later, they were both sitting at the table with mugs filled with coffee.

"So, can you cook?"

He looked at her suspiciously. "Yes."

"Good start. Do you intend to quit your job?" she changed the subject completely.

Now, that was more like what he expected. "Eventually."

"Why haven't you already?"

"I need money to go to school; and before you say anything, I know I could try to get a normal job to support myself and try to save money but with my résumé it would be either a waiter or a dog walker and I would never be able to go to college."

"Rory would give you the money in a blink."

He knew it was true; she already had offered after all. "I don't want _her_ money."

"But you don't mind selling your body?"

"_Renting_ it," he corrected. "And yes, I do mind. But right now I'm out of options."

She didn't argue, instead she changed the subject. "What about your family? Why didn't you spend Thanksgiving with them?"

"My father went to buy diapers when I was born and never came back. My mom is a drunk junkie with bad taste in men – really bad. I lived with her and stayed in school until I was fifteen, then it got unbearable so my best friend and I left our homes and got a place together. We dropped out of school so we could work and support ourselves. I worked in construction, restaurants, gas stations – anywhere that would give me enough money to pay rent and food. Didn't have family besides mom and haven't talked to her since I was fifteen."

She nodded. "So you're a drop out," she stated.

"Got my GED when I turned eighteen," he tried to amend.

"Must be hard with Rory having studied in Yale and Harvard," she noted.

He gave her a half shrug, not really wanting to admit it. "It's not easy."

"You know," she started. "I used to study in this fancy private high school and I was really smart." She paused. "But then I got pregnant and I left home as soon as Rory was born to work as a maid in an Inn; college was out of the question. I only graduated from a small community college when Rory was seventeen. And she was in the first row, pride shining in her eyes, cheering me on as if I was getting a PhD from some Ivy League school." She paused again. "She doesn't see you as an inferior because you haven't gone to school yet. She respects you more because you survived a tough childhood."

He stared at her but didn't answer, so she changed the topic. "Biggest dream?"

"College."

"No, college is something you want to do career related. I want to know about your life. You want to travel the world or fuck a celebrity on a plane or whatever…"

He smirked at her crazy talk. "What we say here stays here?"

That got her interest, and in name of curiosity, she nodded.

"A family," he whispered, looking at his clasped hands that rested on the table.

She didn't expect that. She nodded with a smile and a put hand over his clasped ones. "Be good to her."

* * *

As soon as Rory stepped into the house, Jess left the kitchen announcing, "Hey Rory, your mom offered me 700 to sleep with her."

Lorelai, who was following him, looked offended as Rory exclaimed, "Mom!"

"I did not!" she swore outraged.

"Did too!"

"Mom?" Rory questioned.

"I didn't! Don't you believe me?"

"Jess?" The younger woman tried again.

"She did! Don't you believe me?"

Rory sighed, "I'm sorry Jess…" For a moment he thought she was really siding with her mother, but then she continued. "You don't know my mother like I do." Rory turned to Lorelai, "How much were you really offering him?"

Lorelai tried to pull her most innocent look, "Well, we were talking about 700 but I only put 500 on the table." Jess looked shocked and she turned to him, "I knew you wouldn't check if your mother in law was paying you right for your _services_. And, come on, 700 for one night? Are you crazy? You can't possibly be that good."

Rory cleared her throat, "Actually…"

"Really?" Lorelai half whispered as she made a face of disbelief.

"His _starting_ price is 700," Rory pointed out.

"And sometimes it goes up to 3000," he added.

"God, I should be a hooker," Lorelai said seriously.

"Somehow I don't think Luke would be too fond of the idea," Rory said in a wondering tone.

Lorelai ignored her, "Hey Jess, do you know any pimps?"

He chuckled. "Sorry, can't help you."

She pouted. "Damn it."

Rory smiled to herself and shook her head. She took Jess' hand and started going to the door as she announced, "Okay, so we're going to the Inn to rest a little. This whole conversation got me tired."

"Rest. Ahem," the older woman scoffed in an ironic, non-believing way.

* * *

As soon as they entered their room, Jess turned to Rory, showing his true feelings about meeting her mom. "Wow. You said your mom was unique, but this?"

"You can't say I didn't warn you. So, what did you think of my family?" she asked, unsure as she took her shoes off.

"I thought I was the one on trial," he wondered.

She shook her head, "Will loves you, Mom really likes you, and you will meet Luke soon enough. So, what did you think?" she asked again, nervously shifting her weight from a bare foot to another.

He took a step forward and wrapped his arms around her. "They are great."

She looked up at him and smiled. "I'm glad you like them. They are very protective and that scares most guys away."

Jess chuckled. "I'd love to see Lorelai meeting one of your moronic ex-dates."

Rory playfully hit his arm. "Don't be mean. Mom can be really cruel when she wants to."

"Oh, I know. She blackmailed me; said if I didn't sleep with her she would tell you I had hit on her."

Rory pulled away slightly to take a better look at him and narrowed her eyes. "What did you do?"

He shrugged. "Said she was a fucking crazy bitch; that I was leaving and she could tell you whatever she wanted to."

Rory smiled again, "She must have loved that answer. Couldn't have been better, really."

He shook his head. "You two are very strange women."

Rory tilted her head and looked at him as if she was taking a praise, "Thank you."

* * *

**Spoiler:**

"Come on, mom. You've always told me a mother always knows."

Lorelai looked her in the eye. "Does he make you happy?"

Rory looked down and smiled before nodding.

"Does he make you sad?"

Reluctantly, Rory nodded after a moment.

"What if I say he isn't the guy for you?"

* * *

**A/N:** Thank you to **My Captain** for the beta and please **review**!


	23. The ExBoyfriend

**A/N:** As always, thank you to my wonderful beta **Kerrie** for wasting her time editing SoL. And since I can't seem to write anything hal-good right now, until I'm able to write something actually worth posting to dedicated to my wonderful friend **Natália DeLuca**, this is for her. I love you, girl. Thank you to everyone who still read SoL and please, review.

By the way, I started posting at my LJ - it's homepage link on my profile - again after the longest time and I'm supposed to put some spoilers there every now and then, so if you are interested in spoiler for SoL, check it out once in a while.

**

* * *

****Chap 23**

They crossed the street towards the old hardware store that had been turned into a diner.

"So, what is your step-dad like?" Jess asked, trying to sound flippant.

Rory looked at him sideways, analyzing the way he rubbed his hands together to keep them warm in the chilly late morning and fixed his gave in the floor to try to hide his nervousness.

She reached for his hand, holding it and smiled. "He is fine. Very protective—so don't expect the most warming welcoming—but since mom and Will like you, he won't give you a hard time," she said, squeezing his hand.

He nodded. "They've been married long?"

Rory shrugged, "We've known Luke since forever, I think. Mom and I would eat every meal in the diner since I was a little kid and I think he has always been in love with mom, but she was too oblivious to notice it." She paused, "Anyway, they've been married for about five years, but Luke has been the guy in the family for much longer."

They were only a few feet from the door when Jess stopped and placed a hand on her forearm. "Okay, one last question before we go in: about us and what I do…?"

"He doesn't and won't know anything—at least for now. He wouldn't be quite as understanding as mom."

Jess nodded, "Good, I'm not exactly anxious to tell anyone else about what I do."

Rory looked at him with apologizing eyes. "I'm sorry I told Tris and mom—it's just, they always know… everything."

"It's okay," he smiled at her reassuringly and opened the door to the diner, holding it open for her.

They entered the almost empty diner to find Lor playing with Will at one table while Luke came from the kitchen holding a dish.

"Hey, you guys are here!" Lor stood up to greet the couple and Will followed, screaming his sister's name.

"Rooorrryyyy!"

Rory crouched in front of Will, taking him in her arms and spinning him around, screaming his name just like he had done a moment ago. "Will!"

She kissed her brother's cheek before setting him on the floor. As soon as his feet touched the ground he ran to Jess "You brought Jess!" he announced, excited as he offered Jess his hand to shake.

"Hey Will!" Jess smiled and knelt down to shake Will's hand as "grown ups" do.

Lor hugged Rory. "Hey, baby." Then she turned to Jess and nodded at him with a smile. "Happy Thanksgiving, Jess."

"Thanks, Lorelai. You too."

Luke turned his full attention to their guest. "So… you're Jess," he said with a little bit of disdain.

Lorelai hit her husband in the ribs not too gracefully or subtly.

Jess cleared his throat. "Uhm… yeah, that's me." He paused. "Nice to meet you, sir."

At the "sir," Lorelai and Rory started giggling while Will's eyebrows furrowed in confusion.

"Why are you calling dad 'sir'?"

"Because Jess apparently wanted to just make a fool of himself, baby," Lorelai "explained" to her son with a smile.

Luke half-glared at Jess. "Don't call me 'sir.'"

"Okay. Sorry, I guess."

"It's fine," he grumped. "Okay, I guess everyone is ready to eat so I'll go get the turkey."

"Good idea, honey," Lorelai kissed her husband on the cheek, only to have him blush and walk to the kitchen. "I love to embarrass him," she admitted cheekily once he was out of earshot.

Jess chuckled and shook his head at the older woman. A minute later, Luke came back with the turkey and started serving everyone as Lor started small talking.

"So, Jess, Rory told me you broke your leg a little while ago. You're fine now?"

"Yes, like I told you on the phone that time you called and I told you I was living with Rory, a cab hit me and broke my leg. But I took my cast off about a week ago—I'm fine now," Jess told her as they ate.

"How long have you and Rory been seeing each other?" Luke asked Jess gruffly, still half glaring.

Jess cleared his throat, "A few months. I've been living with her for three months."

"_We've_ been living together in _our_ apartment for three months," Rory corrected and everyone turned to look at her in shock.

An awkward silence fell on the table that only Will didn't seem to notice, so it was a welcomed surprise when he broke the silence. "Hey, Jess, you like parks. The town square is just across the street. We could go there after lunch!"

Jess looked at Lorelai to check if it was okay and she just shrugged and nodded. He smiled down at the little boy. "Sure, Will. You can show me all the cool spots in town."

The little boy frowned. "Well, there is the town square, the gazebo and the diner. Oh, and there is the bridge but I can't go there because once I fell—"

"You mean you _intentionally_ fell," corrected Lorelai, glaring but trying to hide a smile at the same time.

"Still, I fell," Will tried to amend with an innocent look and Jess couldn't help but chuckle. "But you should ask Rory to take you there. It's Rory's favorite spot in town!" Will told him, excited.

Jess looked up at Rory and smiled, "I'll be sure to ask her, Will."

* * *

After lunch, Will dragged Jess down the street towards the town square as Lorelai and Rory followed them, holding steamy to go cups of coffee in their hands. They both sat on swings and watched with smiles on their faces as Will and Jess played on the playground. Jess seemed to be having almost as much fun as Will, and for a moment Rory thought they looked like father and son.

Rory looked sideways to her mother from the swing she sat on. "So, Mom?"

"He has potential," Lorelai answered, swinging herself lightly.

"Come on, Mom. You've always told me a mother always knows."

Lorelai looked her in the eye. "Does he make you happy?"

Rory looked down and smiled before nodding.

"Does he make you sad?"

Reluctantly, Rory nodded after a moment.

"What if I say he isn't the guy for you?"

Rory blinked once, then again and again, looking completely lost and confused as though the possibility had never crossed her mind.

Lorelai smiled and pulled her daughter close to her before kissing her hair and whispered, "He is the guy for you."

Rory looked up at her with confusion. "But I told you he made me sad."

"If he didn't it wouldn't be real."

"But he is a hooker; how can you say he is the right one for me?"

"Did you expect me to say he wasn't?"

"Yes! No… I mean, I don't know…"

Lorelai sighed and smiled before explaining, "He may be a hooker now, but that doesn't define him. What matters is that he seems to be a good guy. And he really cares about you."

Rory hid her face behind the curtain of her hair while asking shyly, "How do you know?"

Lorelai smiled mischievously, "A mother always knows."

* * *

When she heard the door open to the soft laughter of two familiar faces, Lorelai quickly turned to face the door. "Rory, look who is here!" Lorelai announced as soon as Rory and Jess stepped into the house.

Rory stared at the person standing in the middle of her mother's living room in shock. "Logan?" she asked, disbelieving.

"Hey, Ror," Logan smirked, walking towards her. "I met Emily in an event and she mentioned that you were in Stars Hollow for the holiday and that I should stop by," he finished, standing less than a foot from her as she continued to just stare at him in shock.

Luke stepped closer to Lorelai and whispered in her ear, "Maybe we should leave and give them all some privacy."

Just then Jess stepped forward, wrapping an arm around Rory's waist with a huge smile and asked sweetly, "Ace, aren't you going to introduce me to your friend?"

Lorelai grinned and sat on the couch, "Oh, I'm definitely not going anywhere."

Luke rolled his eyes and left to go to the kitchen, finding the living room too crowded for his liking.

Rory gaped at Jess and blinked a few times before finally coming back to her senses. "Uhm… sure. Jess, this is Logan, an old acquaintance." Logan furrowed his eyebrows, not liking the title. A second later, Rory continued, "Logan, this is Jess, my boyfriend."

"Boyfriend?" Logan raised his eyebrows again.

Jess ignored him and offered him his hand to shake, "Nice to meet you. Logan, right?"

"Yeah," Logan said coldly, shaking Jess' hand.

"Sorry, I'm just surprised. I thought I knew all of Rory's friends and since she never mentioned you and I've never seen a picture of you in the apartment…" he said casually.

Logan paused, staring at Jess before confirming, "You two are living together?"

"Well, yeah, there was no point in paying two rents when I couldn't spend a night away from her—If you know what I mean…" Jess smirked at Logan conspiratorially, as you would to an old friend.

"I can guess," Logan replied glaring at Jess.

Lorelai just smirked as if she was watching an extremely entertaining movie—starring her daughter's love life.

"Anyway, we should all go out when we get back in the city. I bet we'll be old pals in no time, just like how it happened to Tristan."

"You know Tristan?" Logan asked in a mixture of surprise and distaste.

"Of course. He is always over at our place. We should all go to a basketball game. Just the guys, you know?" Jess said in a tone he knew would just piss off Logan even more.

"I'm not a sports guy, sorry," Logan gritted through his teeth before turning to Rory. "Maybe we could grab a cup of coffee when you get back," he offered her.

For a moment, both men remained quiet as she wrapped her mind around what was happening and tried to come up with an answer. "Yeah, sure," she told him and he smirked just as the cat that ate the canary. That is until she continued. "Just let me know with some notice to make sure Jess is available too," she finished while taking Jess' hand in hers and holding it around her waist.

Logan straightened and cleared his throat, "Yeah, sure," he said, though it was obvious he meant anything but. He looked at his watch. "Well, I guess I better go. It was just supposed to be a short visit."

"Bye, Logan," Rory said coolly.

"Yeah, bye, Logan," Lorelai imitated her daughter, making her presence known. The blonde man turned and was walking himself out when he suddenly heard the other guy's voice.

"Give us a call if you change your mind about that game," Jess called.

Logan just nodded his head, making his way for the door, not bothering to look back.

Once he was gone, Jess turned to Rory. "He didn't get our number," Jess said in fake worry.

"I don't think he actually meant to call, dear," Rory replied in the same fake, sweet tone.

Lorelai started laughing uncontrollably. "This was funnier than a marathon of chick flicks." Then she sighed with a huge smile on her face, looking at the couple in front of her as though she had just realized something, "Oh my God! My grandchildren are going to be both gorgeous _and_ witty!" she said excited in a high-pitched tone.

Rory and Jess stared at the older woman in shock.

"And I just pulled a Emily Gilmore right there, didn't I?" she continued, slightly scared at the thought.

Rory chuckled and nodded while Jess remained quiet, trying to recover from the shock of the idea of "children."

Rory took him by the hand, pulling him towards the door, "Come on, Jess. I think you've already had enough family action today to last a year."

And he just nodded slowly—he couldn't agree more.

* * *

The car was parked on the driveway of the Gilmore house, and Jess was packing it with their bags while Rory and Lorelai said their goodbyes on the porch.

"Do you have to leave so soon?" Lorelai whined like a child.

Rory just smiled. "You know, some people have to work tomorrow. And guess what? One of those people is me!"

"But you could always quit!" Lorelai replied as though it was a logical answer.

Rory chuckled, "Of course I could. But then you'd never get Dolce & Gabbana on Christmas."

Lorelai's expression change in a second. "Well, after thinking it over, maybe you're right. I mean, people have to work and you love working. So why should I stand in your way, right? By the way, there is a red leather purse from their new collection that would be great friends with my black Jimmy Choo's."

Rory rolled her eyes. "Fine, I'll remember that."

"Seriously though, come visit more. It was great having you here."

Rory smiled sincerely before hugging her mom. "I'll try to come more often. I really miss you guys."

When they let go, Jess approached them. "We're all packed. Where are Luke and Will?"

"Luke took Will to have some ice cream. Luke was never one for goodbyes and Will isn't any better."

Jess nodded in understanding. He wasn't very fond of them himself.

"Okay, so I guess that's it. I'll call you when we get home, mom," she hugged Lorelai again. "I love you," she whispered into the older woman's ear.

"You too, sweetheart."

Rory climbed down the steps and walked to the car as Jess stood awkwardly in front of Lorelai. "Uhm… well, it was nice meeting you. Hope to see you guys some time soon."

Lorelai grinned at his discomfort and hugged a nervous Jess who didn't actually react to the embrace. "Take good care of her, okay?"

He nodded. "I will."

He turned around and was about to descend the steps when she spoke up.

"Jess," she called and he turned around, "you're a great guy. I know things look messed up right now, but as long as continue to show how much you feel about my daughter and she feels the same, everything can work. Just don't do anything to change the way she feels about you, okay?"

He nodded, though he thought his job alone was reason enough to make her feelings change.

As though she could read his mind she continued, "It's not what you do that matters, it's who you are."

He sighed in relief, even though he wasn't sure why. "Thank you, Lorelai, really."

She nodded, smiling, and he walked down the steps and to the car. It was time to head back to their lives – and to his job.

* * *

**Spoiler:**

Of course she couldn't sleep. She re-organized all her shoes, her DVDs, her books. Reviewed the details of her last deal. Twice. Flipped through the channels on her TV. But nothing could hold her attention for longer than five seconds. All she could think about was him—with some other woman.


	24. The Job

**A/N:** I'm so sorry it took me so long to write this. Thank you so much to my faithful readers and to Kerrie, my beta. Oh, and I've started updating my livejournal again which pretty much only talks about fics.

* * *

**Chap 24**

She turned off the shower and heard him talking on the phone. She knew it would happen sooner or later—he had to go back to work. She wrapped a towel around herself and sighed, blocking his voice for a moment and trying to focus on anything else. Of course it didn't work. She rubbed her closed eyelids and walked out of the bathroom as he turned around at the sound of the door opening.

"Yeah, Debbie, I'm free… no, it's fine," he paused, talking on the phone but looking at Rory. "Look, I have to go now, but I'll be there. Yeah, bye." He hung up and tried to smile at her. "Hey."

She forced a small, fake smile. "Hi."

The air was thick and neither knew the right thing to say—probably because there wasn't such a thing.

She looked away. "Client?" she asked, even though she knew the answer.

He nodded. "Yeah. My leg is all healed up now so I'm going to start working again next week."

It was her turn to nod quietly.

"Look, Rory, you knew I was going back to work—" he started defensively.

"I didn't say anything," she cut him off.

He paused. "You didn't have to. Your face said plenty."

"What do you want me to do? Be all smiles about you going back to work?" she asked, a little put off. "Listen, I'm not complaining or asking you not to go or anything for that matter, but don't expect me to be jumping from excitement at the idea of you going back to sleeping with other women!"

He threw his head back and let it roll form one shoulder to the other, sighing and defeated. "I know. I'm sorry, you're right."

She laughed painfully. "I don't want to be right, I just want… God, I don't want anything. I don't know what I want," she paused. "I just want for this to be over." She paused again. "Look, I'm not complaining; I'm not going to complain. Just forget I said anything. I have to get ready for work anyway, so… let's just forget this happened." She turned around to walk back to their room to get dressed.

"Rory!" he called. She only turned her head to look at him. "I just want this to be over, too. We're on the same page, ok?"

She didn't answer; she just walked into their room. It wasn't okay—she was pissed off at the situation—and at him—and she didn't want to say it was okay just to make him feel better. At that moment she didn't think he deserved to feel better—she just wanted to be mad, because at that moment she didn't think they were on the same page. If they were then he wouldn't be in some other woman's bed the following week.

* * *

A week later Rory felt something between despair, agony, and numbness as she sat on their bed, watching as he toweled his hair and put on some jeans and a black shirt. He looked at her with an expression that she couldn't distinguish—a look somewhere between pain and pity.

He walked to the nightstand on the other side of the bed with her eyes following him as she watched as he took his wallet and some condoms and put them in the back pocket of his jeans. Just like that, what he would be doing within the hour suddenly became very real to her. She felt sick just imagining it.

He walked around the bed until he was standing in front of her and leaned over to give her a kiss on the forehead but she flinched away in reflex. His eyes got big and the hurt in them was as clear as day.

"I will be back soon," he promised. She knew it was his way of saying he wouldn't spend the night out, so she nodded silently, looking down.

"I—I don't know what to say," he said honestly. And when she looked up, her eyes were as cold as stone.

"There is nothing to say. You should just go."

Her tone gave chills to his spine but he nodded nonetheless, turning around and leaving the apartment. Just after he left she allowed the silent tears that were begging to fall roll down her face.

* * *

The hours ticked away and, of course, she couldn't sleep. She watched the clock, counting the minutes.

She re-organized all her shoes, her DVDs, her books. Reviewed the details of her last deal. Twice. Flipped through the channels on her TV. But nothing could hold her attention for longer than five seconds. All she could think about was him—with some other woman. After a few hours of running around the apartment doing ridiculous tasks—trying to make her mind go numb—she decided to sit on the couch and stare at the clock she had set on the coffee table in front of her, watching as every second ticked and made the stinging pain in her chest grow bigger.

Finally, a little over an hour later, she decided to go to bed; after all, making herself aware of every minute that he wasn't with her because he was working definitely wouldn't make her feel any better. She changed into a long sleeved pajama dress and let herself fall onto the bed, hiding under the covers and trying to pretend that nothing was wrong. She closed her eyes tightly and a few minutes later she heard the lock of the door being opened. She just took a deep breath, forced herself to relax and turned on her side, pretending to be asleep.

She heard his quiet steps as he got into the room, rummaged through his clothes and left the room again. She heard the water of the shower and a few minutes later the soft click of the door when he closed their bedroom's door. She felt the mattress sink under his weight as he sat down and could easily imagine his every move as he put on a pair of sweatpants.

Still, she didn't make the slightest noise. She heard him move under the covers and felt his body so close to hers that it hurt not to reach out and touch him. She felt his lips on the nape of her neck and she heard the softest voice she had ever hear in her life when he decided to talk to her.

"I know you're pretending. I know you are awake. And it's okay, you don't have to face me right now. Just remember I'm here. If you want to talk or whatever, just roll over and I'll be here—anytime."

She opened her eyes but refused to move, keeping her pretense as if she hadn't heard a word of what he had said.

* * *

The nights kept coming and going and nothing much had changed from that first night. It still ate her up inside to know every time he left their apartment at night he was to go to another woman's bed, but she refused to comment on it. Their relationship had, as expected, become a strained. She didn't smile often anymore and, though he tried, he couldn't pretend that buying her a third edition of her favorite book or bringing her breakfast on bed on occasion wasn't his way of making it up to her out of guilt for making her so upset.

Some weeks, when he noticed she had become quieter than what had become usual, he would cancel a few clients and spend the night with her—but even that wasn't enough lately. Sometimes she would not want to be touched by him, and for the first time in his life he had heard a "I have a headache, I'll just go to bed" as a line to not sleep with him.

He was always available to her. He would be damned if he would ever turn her down when he was making her feel so miserable. And when she didn't turn away from his touch, he would make it worth her while. He would please her as he had never pleased any other woman. After over six months of dating her, he knew her body way better than he knew the palm of his hand.

When she refused to be touched by him they would go out for dinner, watch a movie, or do some other inane thing—anything that didn't require her to be close to him. It could sound crazy, but even though she loved him as she had never loved another man, sometimes, when she remembered the situation they were in—he was too proud to accept her money he hurt her from that—made her so sick that she despised him. In those moments she truly and utterly hated him and the mere thought of being near him enraged her. But sick as it was, she couldn't pull away for too long because she knew soon enough her love for him would overcome her senses.

On one of those nights, they laid on the couch together watching a movie. It was late at night when the phone rang and Jess answered it while Rory paused the film. "Hello?... Hey man, how are you?... Um, yeah, she's here… sure… hold on…" Jess frowned and turned to Rory, handing her the phone. "It's Matt. He wants to talk to you."

She looked at him with furrowed eyebrows as if to ask "Why?" and he shrugged.

"Um… Matt? Hey, how are you?... I'm fine, thanks… Oh, no, it was nothing… Tomorrow? Um… sure, I think Jess is free," she said while looking at her boyfriend who nodded. "Yeah, I know… Okay, I'll see you there." She hung up and turned to Jess.

"So, what did Matt want?"

"He wanted to thank me for getting Miranda that interview with Paris; she got the job. To celebrate they asked us to dinner tomorrow night."

Jess raised his eyebrows in an impressed way. "Really?"

"Yup."

"So we're going on a double date." He tried to sound excited, thinking that the prospect of them doing a "normal couple" thing would make her a little happier. He had no such luck. She just turned back to the movie while pressing the play button and, shrugging with one shoulder, agreed, "Yeah, I guess."

He sighed and started stroking her hair, paying no attention to the movie. Sometimes he just didn't know what to do. More and more often he had caught himself contemplating the idea of quitting his "job" just to see her smile as she used to. But then he remembered his lifelong dream of going to college. He felt torn between what had always been the most important thing in his life and what had recently become the most important thing in his life.

He looked down at her angelic face. She probably didn't realize how much he felt for her, but he had complete understanding of the sacrifices she made for him. Hopefully, soon enough it would all be over, but at the moment he just wanted to focus on the feeling of having her in his arms. He was smart enough to know to savor every minute of happiness that life gave him, and having her with him was as good as life could get.


	25. The Silent Words

**A/N:** Hey guys, thank you so much for reading SoL and specially for reviewing it; it simply makes my day. I'm really glad there are people who still read it even after such a long hiatus. Well, I really liked writing this chap and I hope you guys like it too. Also, thanks to my wonderful beta, **Kerrie**, for editing it. Please, review and let me know what you think.

* * *

**Chap 25 **

Rory opened the door to her apartment to find Jess sitting on the couch while dressed up in jeans and a button down dark green shirt.

"I'm sorry I'm late but I couldn't leave earlier. The office was a mess and they needed me," she apologized, rushing to their room.

Jess smiled and shrugged with one shoulder. "It's fine, they won't mind," he assured her as he watched her walk around, trying to decide what clothes to put on.

"What do you think I should wear?" she asked him, looking over her shoulder to the living room.

"I don't know. Anything that makes you feel comfortable."

She scoffed. "Is jeans and a sweater okay?"

"I think so. You could even go in a sweatshirt and a pair of sneakers if you wanted and it would still be fine."

"Okay, now you're exaggerating."

"Am not," he replied simply and honestly.

"Fine, whatever," she rolled her eyes, knowing he was serious. "Let's go. I hate to wait for people and I hate to make other people wait for me," she said, grabbing her purse on her way to the door.

He quickly got to the door and opened it for her like a gentleman. She frowned in surprise but couldn't help the smile that came to her face after. He smiled back, happy to finally do something right.

They walked down the street and hailed a cab. Again he opened the door for her and offered her a hand to get in the car. She looked at him almost suspiciously, but accepted his charming actions. When they got to the restaurant, he insisted on paying the fare and opened the door for her once again.

They walked up to the blonde, slim, and curvy hostess of the restaurant and Jess circled Rory's waist with his arm, pulling her close. "Reservation for four under 'Mariano.' Our friends have probably arrived already."

The woman in front of him looked him up and down before finally directing her attention to the list of reservations, completely ignoring Rory. "Yes, of course. I'll show you to your table, if you'd please follow me," she said politely but coldly, walking them to one of the tables on the deck.

As soon as she started walking, Rory held Jess's arm, keeping him next to her and way behind the hostess as they walked much slower. Rory unashamedly check the other woman out from head to toe before turning to Jess. "Have you slept with her?"

Jess frowned before looking at her incredulously. "Where did that come from?"

She shrugged. "The way she looked at you." She knew it sounded lame, but she could swear the other woman was undressing Jess with her eyes.

He rolled his eyes. "No, I haven't slept with her."

"Are you sure?"

Now it was his turn to check the hostess out, looking unimpressed. "Pretty sure," he answered and turned his head to look Rory in the eye. "You know, I haven't slept with every woman in the city."

She scoffed, half chuckling. "Yeah, I know. You haven't slept with Paris or the lesbian woman from my office—I think. That's at least two."

"That was uncalled for," he accused, tired of her snappy remarks.

She sighed. "Yeah, you're right… Sorry."

They arrived at their table and—as suspected—Matt and Miranda were already waiting for them. He pulled the chair out for Rory before seating himself next to her. The hostess handed them a menu each and blankly offered, "Let me know if there is anything I can do for you—" she said until she smirked conspiratorially and turned to him before continuing, "…Jess."

A moment later she was gone and Rory was beyond furious. She turned to him, angrily accusing, "You said you hadn't."

"I didn't think I had!" he threw his hands up in defense. "I swear I don't remember her!"

"Oh, yeah, 'cause that makes it so much better. You've slept around so much that you can't even remember whom you've fucked anymore. That really makes me feel better," she tried to whisper so the other patrons wouldn't hear, but did not bother to hide it from Matt and Miranda.

"I'm sorry, okay? I've already said it! You know I'm sorry!"

"I can't even go to a restaurant with you without running into someone you've slept with," she sighed. "I don't even know why I still care. I mean, I should already be used to it by now, right?"

Jess rested his elbows on the table and put his head on his hands, closing his eyes. "Don't do this. Please, don't do this."

"Don't do what?" she asked in a harsh tone.

"Don't start a fight," he pleaded.

She shook her head. "It's not like I want to start a fight, but come on! Were you here two minutes ago when that happened?"

Jess looked at her and opened his mouth to say something, then he closed it and opened it again but no words came out.

Finally a sweet voice filled the silence. "Baby, why don't you and Jess go to the bar to get us girls some drinks?" Miranda suggested before they could start fighting again.

Matt quickly stood up, sighing, feeling tired just from watching them. "Let's go, man. You heard Miranda. The ladies need drinks."

As soon as the guys had left and were out of earshot, Rory turned to Miranda. "I'm so sorry you had to see that. This is supposed to be your celebration; I'm sorry I ruined it."

Miranda smiled and put her hand over the one Rory had resting on the table. "You didn't ruin anything. Don't worry about that. I'm just sorry we chose this restaurant."

Rory scoffed. "I don't think it would have mattered what restaurant you had chosen."

"I'm sorry about how things are going between the two of you."

Rory shook her head. "It's not your fault. I'm just really tired of going to bed knowing my boyfriend is somewhere in the city fucking some other woman. And apparently, I have to be okay with that."

"Of course you don't have to be okay with that. Jess knows it and you know it." She paused. "It's just that—I don't know… I think he just doesn't know how to fix this mess he made."

Rory looked into Miranda's eyes. "He knows. It's very simple: he just has to quit his job."

The other woman looked down, choosing her next words carefully. "I understand what you mean and I completely agree with you. Seriously, I don't know what I'd have done if I were in your position," she paused. "But the thing is… I have known Jess long enough to know how his mind works and he won't stop until he thinks he has enough to do it by himself. But he cares for you—a lot. That's obvious. And believe me, he is in his own very personal hell for making you feel this way. He probably feels more guilt than you could ever imagine."

"You know, sometimes I just don't know anymore…"

"Trust me… I know."

Rory nodded silently and looked towards the bar. "Do you think it'll take them the whole night just to get us some drinks?"

Miranda chuckled. "Nah… They're just giving us time to have some girl talk. Jess and Matt are probably having some guy talk too, though they would never admit it."

Rory smiled. "Thanks for listening. I know you didn't have to and we don't know each other that well. So… just thanks."

Miranda smiled and waved a hand dismissing it. "No need to thank me—it was nothing. I bet you don't have many people to talk to about it and since I already know Jess and everything… well, you can always call me or we can meet for coffee if you want to talk about anything. I think I would go crazy if I had to keep it all inside."

"Thank you, really," Rory said gratefully. Then she looked down at the tablecloth and started picking on a random spot for a couple of moments. Miranda just watched, knowing Rory would talk when she was ready. "Um… can I ask you something?"

Miranda nodded. "Sure."

"You and Matt look good together. How did you two meet?"

"Actually, it was through Jess. Jess and I used to work together."

Rory's eyes got huge. "Oh."

Miranda suddenly realized how it sounded and started laughing and waving a hand in a dismissive way. "Oh, no, nothing like _that_. Before Jess started working… doing what he does… he used to work in a coffee shop and I used to be a waitress there." She paused, remembering. "Matt would come by every now and then to see Jess but after Jess quit he still kept coming. It took months but eventually he got the guts to ask me out and the rest is history."

Rory smiled. "Really? I always thought Matt was the Don Juan type—seducing them all."

Miranda had to laugh again. "Who? Matt? Are you kidding me? Jess pretty literally pushed him to talk to me. If it weren't for Jess, Matt would have probably kept going to the café without saying a word until I quit and we would never have seen each other again."

Rory nodded and played with her napkin, folding and unfolding it. "So, you and Jess are close, too?"

Miranda smiled sadly, understanding the insecurities that must go through Rory every time she heard a sentence with both Jess's and another woman's name in it. "We get along well. He is kind of anti-social and it didn't help him much in the café, but he was very professional; always did what was asked of him but never with a smile on his face. Anyway, I used to be really shy and I think that's why we got along. I was never the cheery shallow type and he liked that I wasn't like some of the other girls in the café who were all over him. It was something between funny and ridiculous the way he would turn them down as if they were stupid little girl—which they were—and still they would come back."

"It doesn't sound too different from his clients; at least the part about them coming back," Rory commented bitterly.

"I wouldn't know," Miranda answered, not sure of what to say.

"Oh, sorry. I shouldn't have said that. Lately it seems I'm just saying whatever comes to my mind without thinking it over first."

"It's fine with me. But maybe it wouldn't be so 'fine' with some other people."

"Meaning Jess?"

"I mean people in general, but yeah, him too."

Rory looked out of the window. "You know, I used to be so careful with everything I said. I was always so worried about what he would think of me."

"And now you don't worry anymore?"

"I guess I just don't care as much anymore."

The table fell silent until the guys arrived with drinks a few moments later and the rest of the dinner was spent in brief times of small conversation with much awkward silence.

* * *

It was Friday night, a little over a week after their disastrous double date, and Rory was in line to pay for her groceries. She shifted her weight from one foot to another, exhausted from having to wear high heels the whole day.

Of course, she could have dropped by the apartment that was only a block away, but then she would have probably bumped into Jess and every Friday night it was already an unspoken rule for her to arrive late; after all, he always had work on Fridays. The other days of the week were already bad enough, never knowing if he was going to work that night or not—and sometimes getting home just to bump into him on his way out. But to go home knowing that she would have to watch him leave… that was just masochistic.

She rode the elevator, holding the two large paper bags on her arms, and tried to open the door without letting anything drop. Suddenly the door opened by itself and Rory almost screamed in surprise, just stopping herself in the last moment when she saw it was Jess holding the door for her.

She walked in, looking at him suspiciously, and dropped the bags on the kitchen counter before walking back to the living room. When she took the first step into the room, she could already see all the changes. The light was dim, coming only from a couple of stylish lamps very well positioned, and Jess had rearranged the furniture to have only the coffee table sit in the middle of the room with cushions all around it. She recognized the soft sound in the background as one of her favorite songs by Coldplay and the smell of Indian food made her mouth water. She looked at the doorframe that led to the hallway to find Jess leaning against it, watching her in such an intense way that it made her feel like he could see right through her. It took her a moment but she finally found her voice.

"It's Friday. You aren't supposed to be home."

He looked around at the apartment and then at her, shrugging. "I'm always supposed to be here."

She didn't know what to say to that so she didn't say anything, just looked around in awe.

"I bought us Indian food," he told her in a soft tone that sounded like he was telling her a secret no one else should know.

"You never let me buy Indian food," she half-accused, puzzled.

"I strongly advise you not to," he countered.

"You hate Indian food," she affirmed.

"I do," he agreed.

"You always say it smells so bad we would have to burn down the apartment the next day."

"And we will have to burn it down tomorrow," he stated. "But tonight we are eating your food, drinking your favorite wine, listening to your favorite band and then making love in whatever way you want." He smiled in a devilish way at her before adding, "And I mean it, baby."

She smiled, with watery eyes. "Why all this now?"

He sighed and kissed her forehead. "Because I _really_ need to see you smile again."

And those words brought a genuine smile to her face. "If it's all about what I want, then let's start with the sex, then go to the food with the wine while we listen to the music."

He grabbed her by the thighs, pulling her up so she could wrap her legs his waist and her arms around his neck. "Where do you want?"

"Bedroom?" she suggested.

He smiled, already walking towards the bedroom and bringing his lips to hers. "Whatever you want, boss."

As soon as he finished the sentence she pushed him away hard, her haunted eyes staring into his. "Don't ever say that word to me again," she ordered in a hurt tone.

"I'm sorry, I didn't realize…" he tried to start explaining but he knew it would just make things worse and in truth she only needed to hear one thing: "I won't."

She let go, ready to get away from him, but he just held her tighter and nuzzled her neck. "I swear I'll never say anything like that again. Please, give me another chance to make it up to you tonight. I really, really want you."

Hearing his voice hoarse from want, she pressed her forehead against his shoulder, taking in his scent. "I want you, too."

He smirked and kissed her neck and his way up to the back of her ear. "Can we go to the bedroom or do you want to go somewhere else?"

"Bedroom is fine."

He walked them into the room and to their bed. He undressed himself quickly and laid down next to her clothed body, running his fingers against the opening of her blouse. "Can I take it off?"

She nodded quietly and he slowly undid the five buttons one by one from top to bottom. Her breathing was already slightly labored and he had barely touched her chest. He ran his fingers from her ribs to her hips. "And this?" he asked, motioning to her skirt.

"Yeah," she answered in a choked voice.

He grinned at the effect he still had on her. He undid the zipper that stood on the side and slipped the offending piece down her legs, licking his lips. "What do you want?" he asked in a very soft voice.

She frowned slightly but kept her good mood and relaxed attitude. "Why do you always ask me that?"

He shrugged with one shoulder and rested his weight on the other, towering over her. "I want to please you. I want to make you feel good and happy."

"I want to make you feel that too, so why should I always choose?" she countered.

"You never choose!" he playfully accused. "You always want to be an equal and let me do whatever I want, even if it's just the basics."

"Um… yeah, I know it's always pretty much the same, and I know that I'm not—"

"Fuck, Rory! I'm not criticizing! I'm just asking you to trust me!" he pleaded, trying to make her understand. "I want you to _know_ that it's just you and me here and that nothing is 'wrong' and that you can trust me; that whatever happens here, stays here if that's what you want. But _please_, let go and just be with me, okay?"

She flushed bright red. "I—I—"

"Don't be embarrassed, baby," he said as if reading her mind. "I've told you, nothing is wrong. I'll never laugh at you. You can say and do whatever you want."

"I don't know how to say it," she confessed and he smiled. She was finally coming out of her cocoon.

"Than don't say it. Let your body do the talking," he suggested. She looked at him puzzled, not understanding how she could do that.

He looked into her eyes, holding her gaze, and took her hand to bring her to her knees. Without saying a word, he undid her bra and took it off, holding her gaze the whole time. Lowering his head, he took her right nipple into his mouth and then her right hand, leading it to rest at the back of his head so she could take control of his ministrations. When she touched his head, understanding the meaning behind his gesture, she moaned and ran her fingers through his hair before leading his head to her other breast. He obeyed, trying to please her as much as he could with his mouth, encouraging her to keep going.

After a few minutes she brought his head up to kiss him passionately, in a way he couldn't remember her ever doing before. They broke apart and she took a deep breath. He knew what he was about to do could very well break the spell, but it just might as well help them through the night. In his lowest voice he asked softly, "Do you mind if I talk?"

She looked at him, kneeling on the bed just like her, and smiled before shaking her head.

He smiled back and tugged at her panties. "Can I take these off?"

She looked coyly at him and nodded.

"Do you want to talk?"

Her smile faded a little as if he was actually ordering her to do it and shook her head again.

He touched the side of her face softly, trying to reassure her. "It's okay, you don't have to. You don't have to do anything you don't want to. I just thought I would ask, okay?"

She nodded slowly, her smile coming back.

"Take the lead; show me what to do, okay? Otherwise I won't know."

She pondered his words and pressed her lips together, looking intensely at his hand. Finally she took his hand and tugged it down even though they were on the same level.

He looked at her puzzled, "Do you want me to lie down?"

She nodded and he did as she had silently asked. He waited for her and a minute later she straddled his chest, giving him the idea of what she wanted. She looked down at him, biting on her lower lip. He knew he had to encourage her, so he took one of her hands in his and brought it to his lips, kissing her palm and nodding his head to show he understood. "It's okay, just do what you want. Nothing is wrong, remember?"

She didn't answer, just kept her eyes on his face, watching for any kind of disapproval as she moved her body up and towards his mouth. He held her eyes and rested his hands on her hips, guiding her and as soon as she was close enough he licked her from bottom to top delving in deep. She moaned loudly, letting her head fall forward. He pulled her closer and started working on her, paying attention to her clit and all the things he had learned about her body. It didn't take long before he felt her legs start trembling and started really devouring her. The noise she made made him feel some weird kind of pride. When she stopped shaking, she rolled to his side exhausted but with a huge silly smile on her face.

He took her into his arms and kissed her neck, whispering into it, "It feels damn good to know that I'm the one who put that smile on your face."

She chuckled and ruffled his hair, biting his shoulder playfully. She slid her hand down between their bodies, taking him in her hands and stroking him tightly, making Jess groan in response.

"Ready for round two, I see."

She smiled mischievously at him and nodded her head with fake coyness.

"You know what you have to do," he said, offering her his hand.

This time she took it without hesitance and got to her knees, pulling him with her. She kissed his chest and the juncture between his neck and shoulder before sighing and turning her back to him to face the mirror that stood in the corner next to the window, facing the whole room if you looked in the right angle. She turned her head and looked back at him, biting her bottom lip, her usual nervous habit, and offered him her hand, watching his intently.

He quickly took her hand in his and moved towards her, asking in a low voice, to make sure he got the right idea, "Behind you?"

She nodded shyly.

He nodded and ran his hand down her belly and to her pussy, touching her. "Here?"

She looked at him carefully, not sure if he was asking a question or permission for something else. She nodded.

He smiled and nipped her neck, "Good, you're thinking about yourself and what you want. That's my girl."

She pouted, a little put off, but another nip from him and it was all forgotten.

He got closer, adjusting himself between her legs until their whole bodies were touching and they could see themselves in the mirror. She turned her head and kissed him slowly, breaking the kiss to turn ahead and touch him from thigh to hip.

He knew it was her way of saying she was ready, but in case of doubt, he was extra slow in pressing himself against her and holding her hip, giving her more than enough time to stop him if that was what she wanted. When she didn't, he started thrusting into her slowly, kissing and licking her neck, shoulders and anywhere he could get his mouth on, while she moaned and groaned. When he looked up a while later he was surprised to see probably the most erotic thing in his life: Rory was arched against him, her head thrown back on his shoulder, one hand holding his hip as the other played with one of her breasts. He groaned loudly and thrust harder into her, making her moan louder in return.

He picked up his tempo as he ran his hands over her body, touching every inch while his eyes drank her in. She noticed his rhythmic thrust and brought her head back up to look at him in the mirror.

They stared at themselves in the mirror, watching each other's face and reactions more than anything else. He stood behind her, thrusting into her, but she was the one most in display. He brought his lips to her ear to whisper into it while his eyes held hers in the mirror. "If you want me to do something, show me. This is the moment," he encouraged her.

She swallowed and took his left hand that was holding her side to her left breast, squeezing it slightly and he began to massage it. "Okay," he said in understanding. She then took his right hand that held her hip in place and he had to protest quietly, trying to be as gentle as possible. "Rory, I can't. I need to hold your hip or I won't be able to thrust into you this hard or with this tempo; it wouldn't be as good for you or for me," he explained but she shook her head tugging his hand harder. He reminded himself that she was the one running the show and that he had explained to her why he needed to hold her hip, but if she still didn't want it there… well, then it wouldn't be there."

What he didn't expect was for her to lead his hand from its place on her hipbone to the left and down, taking two of his fingers and pressing them against her clit, showing him what she wanted him to do. He caught his breath in his throat and rested his forehead against her nape before kissing it and meeting her insecure eyes on the mirror again. "God, you're amazing."

She started grinning again, but soon she started moaning as he started to play with her most sensitive spots while fucking her as hard as he could. "Fuck, Rory," he bit her shoulder, "I missed you so much, baby. So much."

But she didn't answer, just arched her back, taking him deeper. "Oh, fuck, Rory. I can't take it anymore, baby, I need to—" he asked in a broken voice. She understood and nodded her head, contracting around him, but he didn't want to leave her unsatisfied, so he started working with his hands twice as fast and brought his mouth down to a special spot on one of her shoulder blades that for a completely unknown reason had an incredible affect on her. She gasped and groaned as soon as he started sucking and biting on the skin there, coming hard and falling forwards, making him fall on top of her as he kept thrusting hard into her a few more times before coming.

They stayed still and in silence for a few moments before he took her into his arms, kissing her deeply and laying half on top of her. "Now, is it okay to talk?" he asked out of breath.

She smiled shyly, "I suppose."

"Now, tell me if that wasn't completely mind blowing!"

She pouted. "You said we wouldn't have to talk about it."

He looked at the sheets berating himself even though he was excited and couldn't understand why she wouldn't even comment on it. "Sorry, you're right."

At the puppy look he unknowingly gave her, she chuckled and ran a hand down his face. "Yeah, it was extremely mind blowing."

He beamed at her confession with a weird sense of accomplishment. "You know, I'm so proud of you, of how you acted tonight, going after what you wanted. And I'm proud of us. I mean, I guess I changed you in some ways and of course you changed me. And I know it fucking sucks to be with me sometimes but I think somehow we're good for each other, you know? We are good together."

She touched his cheek adoringly. "Yeah, I know," she said, letting her eyes slide close.

A few hours later she tried to turn around on the bed just to collide with a hard, warm body. She ran her fingers up and down his arm, watching the rise and fall of his chest.

"Jess," she called quietly. He just pressed his face further into the pillow.

"Jess, are you awake?"

He sighed but didn't open his eyes. "If I say no can I go back to sleep?"

She remained quiet for a moment. "Yeah, sure, go back to sleep. We can talk tomorrow."

The tone of her voice told him that if he didn't wake up and talk to her then, she would lose her nerve to talk about whatever it was by tomorrow. So, he turned in bed and groaned, stretching. "I'm awake."

"It's nothing important," she assured him. "You can go back to sleep."

He gave her a knowing smile that told her not to try to lie to him. "What is it?"

She shrugged, picking on the hem of the sheets, "I just thought we could talk about our relationship…"

He raised his brows, saying the words she was trying to avoid: "Discuss the relationship?"

Again she shrugged. "Well, yeah, I guess that's a way to see it…"

Jess chuckled and brought her closer, so she could lay her head on his chest, sprawling her hair on it. "Okay, and what is on your mind?"

"I don't know. It's not like I was planning on this discussion or anything…"

"Just tell me what is bothering you, Rory."

She took a deep breath and looked up at him, before looking down at his chest. "What do you see in our future?" she asked suddenly.

"Huh?" he questioned.

"In our future—or your future. What do you imagine will happen? How will your life be in ten years? What do you want to happen?"

"Where is this coming from?"

She shrugged. "I just felt like I should ask. I'm not asking for forever, you know? But if I'm gambling with my heart, then I think I deserve to know what the stakes are."

He stroked her hair and gave her a small smile, watching her. "Yeah, you do," he agreed. "But I can't make you promises that I don't know I can keep. I've never felt for anybody what I feel for you and you are what makes my life bearable right now. But I can't tell you that we'll be together in ten years, especially because I don't know if you'll want me by then."

"What if you are the one who doesn't want me anymore? What if you change your mind in a few months?"

He half scoffed, half chuckled. "I'm pretty sure it's safe to say I'll want you for a long, long time."

"And how do you know that?"

He shrugged with one shoulder. "You make me feel happy in a way I've never thought possible. I have this urge all the time to just come home, because I feel like this is actually home, just because you're here. I love the sex, I mean, I'm _really_ crazy about it; it's mind blowing. And still, it's not all that matters. I know this sounds crazy, but eating Chinese food out of boxes while sitting on the floor with a glass of wine with you is almost as intimate as making love to you. And I can see myself doing that with you for the next ten, fifteen, and twenty years."

She gave him a sad smile because she knew his next word. "But…"

"But I don't know if you can wait for me to stop working. I know I say I'll stop soon, and I will, but I don't know if it'll be soon enough for you."

She looked down, drawing abstract figures on his chest with the tip of her fingers. "Sometimes I wonder what you'd choose if I told you it was either me or your job," she confessed in a small voice.

She looked up at his face as he stroked her hair, trying to avoid her eyes.

"But I've never asked because I was always too afraid of the answer," she went on, looking back down.

He paused with his hand mid-air for a second before continuing with his gentle touch.

"You know, sometimes I think I should just ask. I know it could very well break my heart, but this is already breaking my heart, you know?" she said, trying to put logic in her feelings, and then looked up at him again. "What do you think?"

He looked down at her, seeing the agony in her face and sighed. "I think… I think it's time for you to go back to sleep." She nodded quietly, watching him as he finished his sentence, still stroking her hair. "And for me to spend the rest of the night awake, hating myself."


	26. The Fantasy

**Author's Note:**

Hey guys!

I'm so very sorry that it took me so long to update. And it's not a future chap but an "extra" chap that should fit somewhere after Jess moved in with Rory and before she went to visit Tristan. I added it between chapter 25 (when they have sex and she tells him she wishes she was brave enough to give him a ultimatum) and 26 (when she gets really pissed off and decides to go to Boston to spend some time with Tristan).

This chapter was written almost a year ago but I could never find a way to use it in the story and since I'm pretty sure I won't be able to use it in the future I decided to just fit it in between two past chaps. I hope you like and review it. It'd be very important for me.

Also, I just need to proof read next chap so I'll be posting it in the next few days.

I'd like to thank everyone who has reviewed this story, specially those who have reviewed it recently. It inspires me to keep writing.

* * *

**Chap 26**

He stepped into the bedroom and froze when he found a naked Rory on the bed, except for a pair of tiny black panties that were way too sexy for her to be comfortable wearing. She was stretched on the bed with her hands over her head, almost touching the headboard and a long silk scarf on her hands. She was blushing furiously, more flushed than he had even seen her, and it was not only her face but her whole body.

He instantly knew she was trying to make one of his fantasies come true and he had to smile at her effort, knowing how difficult it was for her to be there, exposed and vulnerable before him despite her insecurities and self-consciousness.

He walked to the bed as she watched him, looking up at his warm brown eyes. "Hi," she said quietly, blushing even more if it was possible.

Jess sat by her side on the bed and watched the quick rise and fall of her chest and her slightly trembling hands. This was all wrong. "I wanted to surprise you," she told him in a shaky voice.

He smiled warmly at her. "Believe me, you surprised me," he told her, running his fingertips lightly from her collarbone, between the valley of her breasts and to her navel. She visibly shivered and her breath caught in her throat. He bent down and kissed her slowly, not pushing for anything more than an innocent kiss. He pulled away about an inch, his lips still almost touching hers. "You remember when I broke my leg and I told you some of my fantasies and all that?"

She nodded.

"You remember what I told you?"

She knew where he was getting; trying to tell her that she shouldn't do anything she wasn't comfortable with. So before he could make his point she cut him off, "Jess, I want this."

He snorted and shook his head, "No, you don't. You're scared and shaking and uncomfortable. That's definitely not in the fantasy," he tried to joke but she remained in the same position.

"Jess, please, do this with me," she begged, her eyes becoming watery.

He leaned forward and hugged her, nuzzling her neck, "I can't do this. It'd just feel wrong. I know you are trying to please me, but not this way."

She started to cry, "I need you to do this."

The desperation in her voice started to worry him, "Why?"

"Because…" she sighed, "Just because."

He shook his head, "Give me one good reason."

"Because I can't have you do this with someone else. I know, it's insane, but I just can't!" Now she was openly crying, "So, please, just do it already!"

He looked shocked at her and felt guilty, because he knew that even though she had been screwed up long before he came into the picture, the tears that were desperately falling down her eyes now were because of him.

He took the silk scarf from her hand and she closed her eyes, willing herself to remain calm as she waited for him to tie her hands. But nothing happened, and after a few minutes she opened her eyes. He was in the exact same position; looking down at her with warm chocolate eyes. The only difference was the scarf in his hands.

"I'm not tying you up today," he announced, and only after he heard the words out loud he realized how weird they really sounded.

She looked at him pleading, "I promise it'll be good," then she looked down, unsure, "well, at least as good as it can be with me." She shrugged, "I'll do whatever you want."

He shook his head and took her hands in his, rubbing her wrists to make her circulation go back to normal. "I'm not doing that with you tonight. I'm not saying we'll never do it. I'm just saying tonight it's not gonna happen."

She looked at him, sad and in defeat.

"I'm not gonna do that with anyone else; I swear," he stopped and looked deep into her eyes. "But we are going to talk and it's gonna be right now. I don't care if I have to tie you to this bed for a week; we're talking about sex tonight."

Rory sat up, ready to get out of bed when she felt his hands on her shoulders pulling her down on the bed. "I'm serious, Rory. I've tried to talk to you about it a hundred times and you always change the subject," he shook his head. "This affects you much more than you let on and I'm tired of seeing you feeling bad about yourself because of sex. You have issues about it that we could have already fixed if you'd just talk to me."

She looked to the side, "There is nothing to talk about."

He ignored her, "I know that what I do for a living bothers you, but can you be more specific about why?"

She turned to him disbelieving, "Are you seriously asking that?"

He just kept looking at her the same way.

She sat down, leaning against the headboard and brought the sheets around her as she was getting self-conscious. "Jess, there is no point on talking about it. It doesn't matter why I hate what you do; you still have a client tomorrow night."

"Just… entertain me, okay?"

"Fine," she gave in a bit pissed off, "I hate to think of you with other women. I want you to be only mine."

He just nodded, encouraging her to go on.

"And it makes me insane when I get into a room and smell the same perfume that you smell like when you come home from 'work'. I keep wondering if the woman wearing it is your client, if you two-"she stopped, looking down.

When she didn't continue he prodded, "If we…?"

In a smaller voice she continued, "If you two have something. If you feel something for her. If she is better than me. More beautiful, more intelligent, more interesting, and especially if she is a better fuck. I keep wondering if one day you'll go to 'work' and you'll just… not come back. If you're going to leave me. If I'm not enough."

"If I tell you that's crazy you won't believe me, will you?" She looked at him from the corner of her eye and he knew the answer. "Okay, so why do you think you're not good in bed or that you're not enough for me in some way?"

"Look at what you do for a living! You know you are amazing and that your clients are crazy about you. Beautiful, rich, experienced women. Now, look at me! Do you know how many guys I've slept with? Three; Tristan, Logan and you! That's how pathetic and inexperienced I am. I don't know how you still haven't gotten bored with me," she confessed.

He wanted to correct her, tell her he didn't care about half of the things she was talking about and that in reality she was nothing like she was describing herself. But he knew if he did that she'd stop talking and he possibly would never get her to talk so openly about sex and her issues with it with him again.

"That's for me to know. Now about your ex-boyfriends..."

Rory's eyebrows shot up, "What?" She turned to stand up, "I have to put on some clothes."

He held her by the wrist, pulling her gently back to the bed. The way she was exposed, naked and talking about something she considered too personal to talk about, probably with anyone, while he was in control, clothed and making the questions was really getting to her and making her even more uncomfortable. He looked at her in understanding and started taking of his shirt, than his pants and boxers. Soon, while she was in her panties he was completely naked in front of her.

She sat there looking at him with big doe eyes and accepting that this time there was no way out, "What do you wanna know?"

"Tristan seemed like an okay guy," he said with some difficulty. "Why didn't it work out?"

"When I met him he wouldn't stop tormenting me; he'd call me Mary, like Virgin Mary," she blushed, thinking that that's how she still felt next to Jess. "Well, he was the King of the school and he would ask me out all the time and I would turn him down every time. Eventually, I ended up accepting, one thing led to another and we started dating. Tristan was a great boyfriend; we really cared about each other. I don't know, maybe we were in love. But then it just didn't feel right; I loved him, but not in that way. Sex became awkward; think of having sex with your sister – if you had one." Jess made a face and she chuckled. "Well, I think he started feeling the same way so we agreed it'd be better to break up. After that we became even closer, real best friends as you saw."

"Yeah, a little too close in my opinion," he said and she rolled her eyes but smiled. "But he is fine. So, what about this Logan guy?"

"Logan…" she sighed. "He was a rich bastard who treated people like he could simply buy them. But for some reason I fell for him. He told me he wasn't the boyfriend type so we started with an 'open relationship' but then he got jealous and we ended up dating. One day we had a fight and he thought we had broken up so he simply went and slept with the whole bridal party of his sister's wedding. The one I was part of. God, they wouldn't stop talking about him and comparing… After that I broke up with him, changed schools and my major."

He was impressed about how much she changed her life because of a guy, "Why you went so far to get away from him?"

"Harvard had been my dream college my whole life but for some crazy reason I ended up going to Yale instead. But after what happened it just sounded crazy to stay there. And well, I studied journalism and if I kept my major it'd be inevitable to run into him. He owns almost the whole business."

He nodded and got closer to her, running a hand through her hair. "Is it possible that Logan made you feel unworthy because of the cheating thing, which doesn't help since I have to sleep with other women for a living, and the fact that your two previous boyfriends sounded like womanizers, which you probably also consider me, made you feel insecure?"

She narrowed her eyes at him and tilted her head, "Have you ever thought about being a shrink?"

He chuckled, "Yeah, for one day, then I figured I was too screwed up to try and listen to other people's problems."

There was a short comfortable silence before she broke it, "So, can we have fun now?"

He shook his head, "We haven't finished talking."

She played with the hem of the sheets, biting her lower lip, "I'm getting uncomfortable," she confessed.

He brought her closer to him and kissed her slowly. The kiss wasn't long and when it finished he rested his forehead against hers, "You wanted me to tie you down, right?"

She nodded, blushing.

"So, that means you trust me?"

She hesitantly nodded again.

"Okay, then just trust me in this, okay?"

"Jess, please-"

He nuzzled her neck to whisper in her ear, "Close your eyes. I promise it won't be that bad." She did as she was told and he gently pulled her down to the bed with him, laying next to her. "Rory, I've never lied to you about anything and I promise not to lie to you now. But I need you to do the same, okay?" She made a face, tilting her head to the side. "Look, I know you're nervous and embarrassed but you have no reason to be. I just want to help you get over what these idiots – including myself – did to make you feel this way. I won't judge you or hold anything against you."

She knew he was telling the truth and she trusted him, so she sighed and, even though it went against her natural instincts, she nodded, "Okay."

He cupped her face and ran his thumb down her cheek and lips, "Why are you so insecure about how I feel about you?"

She sighed heavily, "It's just... you're so... you know? People... women usually... they feel drawn to you. And I can see why. I just don't get why you're with me. I just feel like I'm not... enough?

A moment later she could feel the bed move and his lips on her ear. "You are; I need you to know that you are. I think that there is this thing about two people… that they just are or aren't special to each other; no reason whatsoever." He kissed her neck, his lips still touching her flesh, "And you are special to me."

Her breathing was irregular and he could clearly see how their conversation was affecting him. "Tell me you believe me," he asked.

"I do," she answered in a shaky voice.

He leaned down and kissed her forehead, "Okay, next question; since you found so hard to tell me what you like in bed let's start with something you don't like to do in bed?"

She was blushing furiously and even though she wasn't looking at him, she knew he was watching her like a hawk. He had asked her to close her eyes so she would feel more comfortable since she wouldn't be looking at him, but apparently it wasn't making much difference. He gave her a light nudge, "Hey, remember, there is no right or wrong."

She bit her lips, "I don't like it when things get too rough. It makes me uncomfortable, a little scared. As much as I try, I just can't get myself to enjoy it."

First he froze, then his blood started boiling because he knew that if Rory was calling it 'rough' it must have been much more than that. She was always very submissive, trying to please in whatever way she could even if it meant doing things she didn't want to. And he would bet good money he knew who did that to her. "What do you consider 'too rough' Rory?" he asked with his voice as calm as he could manage.

She gave a small fake smile and shook her head, "This is just me being stupid. It's nothing, actually; just normal stuff."

He bent his head and kissed a spot on her ribs just under her right breast, "Ror… no lying, remember?"

She took a deep breath, "Too much force, grabbing, hitting, leaving marks and bruises… he probably didn't even know what he was doing. He was drunk most of the time back then-" she suddenly stopped noticing she had said too much.

Jess had to remind himself that he had promised not to judge anything she said and therefore he couldn't just scream and tell her he wanted to beat Logan up until he passed out. So instead he continued with the same calm voice, "And you think that justifies what he used to do?"

"Jess I was there because I wanted to. I went through that because I wanted to," she reminded him.

"No, it wasn't because you wanted to. It was because you are so insecure that you'd pretty much do anything to keep your boyfriend. You always seek to please the guy first instead of trying to find your own pleasure. It was the same thing with me; when I told you what I liked you were almost apologizing in advance if you weren't good at those things!"

"Is there a problem in wanting to please my boyfriend in bed?"

"If it makes you feel uncomfortable or if you don't get to come because of it, then yes, there is!"

She took a moment before answering, "You know you always makes me come. I think you wouldn't let yourself come if I wasn't just as satisfied."

He nodded even though she couldn't see, "I always do that because I know that if I don't you'd spend a whole year fucking me every day, not having a single orgasm, and still wouldn't say a word about it," he stopped. "What about Logan?"

She tensed, "What about him?"

"Was it like that with him, too?"

She blushed harder and turned to the opposite side of where he was. "You know it wasn't. He was my opposite; he just cared about himself."

He placed a hand on her arm and pulled her gently towards him. "I'm not trying to upset you; you know that, right?"

She nodded, "I know. But it still hurts… remembering everything."

"I know," he spooned her, comforting her the best way he knew.

She sighed, "You know, I have a question."

He smiled, strangely happy that she was feeling comfortable to ask him things, "Okay."

"I was thinking about that conversation we had and the things you've said you have done… you really did all that?"

He stroked her hair. "Yeah, but what is the one thing that won't stop bothering you?" he asked knowingly.

She was quiet for a moment, wondering if she should tell him or not. Then she spat in anger, "Ménage à trois, Jess? Two girls at the same time? Really, how can someone compete with that?"

"How can you compete with that, you mean?" he corrected. "Simple, you just let me be on top sometimes, kiss me on that spot on the base of my neck towards my nape that you know that drives me crazy, hold me as close as you can and when you let me inside you, tell me how much you want me. That does the trick in a way that you can't even imagine."

"And how do the others compete with that?" she couldn't help herself.

He shrugged, "I don't know, I don't care. To tell you the truth I don't think ménage à trois is all that; it's overrated. I know none of them could compete with you when you moan my name as if you were begging for more."

She blushed, "Most times I am begging for more."

He grinned. "About the bondage… why were you so scared? You were shaking", he said lacing their fingers.

"I just couldn't help but wonder what would have happened once you had me tied down, if it would make you change. When Logan drank… I'm not comparing and I know I'm being totally irrational… but I don't know what would have happened if I was to let him tie me up."

"Good thing you'll never know, then," he said, kissing her shoulder. "But I was serious before, I don't want you doing anything you don't feel like doing."

"Can I open my eyes?"

"I don't know? Can you?"

She opened her eyes and turned to him, looking him in the eyes, "I still wanna do the thing with the scarf with you."

He kissed her shortly. "You know, I have some ideas to help you get over all these stuff we talked about – most of them involve sex, so you'd have to completely trust me. I mean it; blindly." She nodded her head as she chewed her bottom lip.

"Most of these stuff will make you feel a bit uncomfortable in the beginning but just go with me, okay?" She nodded. "Okay, so let's start with the scarf thing as you said?"

Again she nodded, took a deep breath to will herself to remain calm and stretched her arms over her head. She was surprised to feel him next to her, in the same position with his hands over his head. Then he did something she had never expected; he handed her the scarf.

"Jess?"

"You know how you keep saying it's not just about you? Well, it has to be sometimes. You always let others be in control; I want you to learn how it feels to be in control. I want you to explore, to find out what you like and don't like."

"That's not your fantasy," she protested.

"Rory, tie me to the headboard while I tell you something." She looked wearily at him and then to the scarf. He nodded to his hands, "Go on." She slowly laced the scarf around one wrist, making a tight knot.

"You know, I've never been good with people, I've never had a serious relationship. And after I started this job I thought I'd never have, that no interesting woman would want to have something besides meaningless sex with a gigolo," he paused. "And then you came along. All nervous and shy, blushing for ridiculous reasons and treating me like you really had a crush on me and wasn't just using me."

She smiled unsure and looked from her task to him, "You sure you wanna do this? We don't have to."

"Keep working," he said with a smirk and she obliged. "I have some fantasies, you know that. But there is one I never told anyone cuz I never thought it could actually come true." He paused before confessing, "I didn't believe I could actually make love to someone, you know? Like have a relationship that worked with someone that cared about me and didn't look down on me because of what I do. Someone that felt so much for me that sex was more than just pleasure and lust. That you still wanted that person even after you were satisfied."

She finished her task, straddled his six-pack and looked into soft warm brown eyes that were so unsure and vulnerable. He was exposing himself just as much as she had just had, only it was in his own way.

She slowly leaned down until his lips were ghosting the shell of his ear and whispered, "Jess… I love you."

His eyes went wide and his lips searched for hers. He tried to hold her but the scarf wouldn't let him and for a moment he regretted asking her to tie him up. She kissed him slowly and deeply, taking her time. When she pulled away his head hit the pillow and he looked at her in amazement, "I've never had anyone-"

"Yeah, I figured." She smiled down at him.

He watched her overwhelmed, "I-"

She shook her head, "Don't. You don't have to say it. And if you say it now it'll feel like you're just doing it out of obligation."

He closed his mouths for a minute but kept his eyes intently on her before whispering, "But I do."


	27. The First Last Straw

**Important Author's Note:**

Hey guys! You need to know that I added a new chap between what used to be chap 25 and 26; in other words:

- chap 25 is still chap 25

- chap 26 is a new chap that I have just added (08/13/2011) and can fit anywhere after Jess moves in with Rory and before Rory goes to Boston to visit Tristan

- chap 27 used to be chap 26

If you have any doubts or questions, just send me a PM.

Now on with the story...

* * *

**Chap 27**

Rory walked through the bedroom on Thursday evening, gathering some papers and her notebook to work in the living room. She took the notebook from her nightstand when she noticed a pile of folded clothes by the foot of the bed. She tilted her head and frowned, trying to remember the last time she had done laundry. She took everything necessary for her work to the living room and sat on the couch next to Jess. She barely noticed the hockey game on the television.

"Have you done the laundry?" she asked.

He glanced at her for a second before returning his attention to the game. "Um… yeah, it's on the foot of the bed. Is there something missing or do you want me to wash something for tomorrow?"

She shook her head while looking at him in a strange way. When he noticed her expression, he pressed the mute button on the remote and turned to her. "Something wrong?" he asked carefully.

"You did the laundry," she answered as if it explained everything.

"Well, yeah, we keep getting them dirty and they just don't wash themselves. Can you believe them?" he mocked her slightly.

"You've been doing the laundry for a while," she added.

He nodded. "Yeah, since I moved in."

"You know you don't have to, right?" she asked hesitantly.

He smiled at her. "Rory, I don't mind."

"But now that I think about it, I haven't done the laundry or the dishes in a long while," she paused and then frowned in horror. "Or even made the bed!"

He laughed loudly. "Yeah, I try to do the chores. You spend the whole day working—and even when you're at home you work a lot. I'm just trying to help out in the apartment since I'm not paying for anything."

"But I don't want anything! It's not like you have to clean up the place because you're living here. I should help out more, and I will. From now on I'll always wash the dishes and make the bed."

"You always have your nails done. If you wash the dishes everyday you'll destroy them, and when you go to work I'm still in bed," he countered.

"Okay, fine, then I'll do the laundry."

"I think you're better at cooking than at doing laundry, and that says a lot." He reached for her hand. "Rory, just let it go. I'm not paying you rent and every time I'm about to go grocery shopping you beat me to it. You don't let me pay for anything. Let me at least do this!"

"I don't want you doing anything, damn it!" she cried exasperated. "It's always about money and making up for something else. I don't want you paying for anything! I just want you to stop working!" she finished, exhausted.

He looked at her, not knowing what to say, so she just took a deep breath, stood up and went to the shower. There was little point in discussing it anyway.

* * *

Her phone rang as she crossed the street on her way to the little restaurant at the corner of her office. Per usual, she answered without even checking the caller. "Rory Gilmore speaking."

"Do you always answer your phone this formally?" he asked on the other side of the line as she immediately broke into a huge smile.

"Hey, baby. How is it going?" she answered playfully.

She could swear she heard his smug smirk over the phone, "That's more like it. And I'm fine, thank for asking. What about you?"

"I'm breathing," she answered in a sigh, as though to prove her statement. "I'm living," she added and even through the phone it was obvious as to how miserable she really was.

"Jess is still working, huh?" Tristan asked, even though the answer was obvious.

Rory sighed again. "He got back to work a couple of months ago," she paused. "Things were going so well while his leg was broken. We had a real relationship. I was actually happy. I guess it was too much to ask for a functional monogamous relationship between us."

"You should come see me, have some time for yourself, get away from the craziness…"

"You say it as if it's that easy."

"Isn't it?"

There was a moment in which she didn't say anything and seriously pondered his question. Wasn't it? "You're probably right," she agreed.

"Seriously?" he asked a bit shocked. "Don't get me wrong, I really think that you should and you're always more than welcomed to come visit me and stay as long as you want, I just didn't expect you to actually agree with me so easily."

She sighed again. "Yeah, I guess I'm that desperate to get away from everything."

There was another long moment in which no one said anything until Tristan broke the silence. "Rory, you really shouldn't settle for this. You don't deserve to be this miserable no matter what."

"I know. I just don't know what to do. I need him. I don't know how to live without him, and I hate that."

"Even when he makes you this unhappy?"

She closed her eyes even though he couldn't see her face to gather the courage to say her next words. They seemed to be her answer every time someone pointed out how miserable she looked. "I'm in love with him. Though lately I wish I wasn't."

Tristan didn't say anything for a long time, unsure of what was the right thing to say. Finally he said, "I just hope he loves you as much as you love him."

She sighed. "Yeah, so do I."

* * *

Rory looked at herself on the mirror appraising her business suit, then turned around to look at Jess with a smile on her face while she put on her watch. "Hey, baby. Let's have dinner tonight. Somewhere nice."

Jess turned in bed to face her. "Can't tonight. Maybe later this week?"

Her smile turned into a thin line. "No, it has to be tonight."

"Well, I'm already scheduled," he repeated.

"So cancel it!" she shouted, showing her clear frustration.

"Rory, I'm not going to cancel a client just because you want to have things your way," he told her in a condescending tone.

She shook her head in a sad and somehow desperate way. "I'm not asking you never to see her – whoever she is – again. I'm just asking you not to see her tonight. Go out with me."

"I'm sorry, I can't," he replied softly.

She sighed and shrugged, grabbed her purse and went to leave the room. "Forget it."

It was his turn to sigh. "Don't be like that," he pleaded as she walked to the door.

"Whatever," she shouted just before she slammed the door.

* * *

Much later that night he arrived at their apartment and went straight to the bathroom to take a shower. Half an hour later, he walked into their room to find Rory half asleep. He noticed a bouquet of red flowers in a vase on her nightstand, a book, and a half something with a red ribbon attached to it. He got closer and took an old copy of The Wonderful Wizard of Oz in his hands. Opening it, he found it was the fourth edition of the book, and certainly cost a fortune. Next to it, with a ribbon of top, there was a weird coffee kit with a mug, different kinds of coffee beans, a couple of certificates for a coffee tasting of sorts, and a couple of certificates for what seemed to be a weekend spa.

He put the book back on the nightstand and looked at Rory puzzled. He went to climb into bed next to her and whispered, "Rory."

She stirred in her sleep and barely opened her eyes. "Oh, hey. If you don't mind, I have to get up early tomorrow."

He looked back at the presents and then at her. "I was just wondering about the stuff on your nightstand," he told her quietly.

She turned around to look at them, then looked back at him. "They are presents."

"Yeah, but what for?" he asked confused.

"My birthday."

"Your birthday? When was it?"

"Today."

"What? Why didn't you tell me?" he asked in sad tone.

"I asked you to go out with me. You said you couldn't, that you had to work. After that I just wasn't really in the mood to bring it up."

"Rory…" he started, not sure what the right thing to say was. "I'm so sorry."

She yawned. "Do you need anything else? I have to go back to sleep."

"What did you do tonight? You didn't just stay home, right?" he asked, regretting his decision to work that night.

She snorted. "No. Mom, Luke, and Will came to the city to have dinner with me. It was nice."

"They gave you all those presents?" he asked with a tentative smile.

"Mom gave me the coffee thing and Luke gave me the spa certificate. Tristan sent the flowers to my office and had someone deliver the book in the evening before I left to the restaurant."

"Huh," he paused. "Why that book?"

"It's my favorite. And he knows I love reading early editions; somehow it makes me feel more in the story, closer to the characters."

"I didn't know that," he said in a quiet voice.

She shrugged. "Is that all? I need to go back to sleep."

His downcast look turned into a smirk and he looked at her appreciatively. "Maybe I can still make it up to you," he said in his most suggestive tone.

She snorted and shook her head. "You still smell like her," she answered before turning on her other side and ignoring him for the rest of the night.

* * *

Jess was in bed reading Persuasion for the fifth time when he heard Rory opening the door to their apartment and slam it shut with enough force to almost break it, screaming, "I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! Fuck! I hate it!"

When he heard her cursing he jumped from the bed. He ran into the living room. "What happened?" he asked as he approached her.

She turned around to look at him and he would never have imagined that she could have such a cold and angry look in her eyes; there was just so much hatred that it scared him. And he certainly had never imagined that one day he would be on the receiving end of said glare.

"What happened?" she chuckled angrily. "I'll tell you what happened. Today at lunch I had to hear from my new employee about her sex escapades with you! That's what happened!" she shouted.

She kept shaking her head, not able to control herself. "Do you understand it, Jess? Do you understand how fucked up this is? Because most of the time I don't!" She threw her arms up in the air. "Can you see how fucked up this is? Can you? Because it really is and it is making me sick!"

She suddenly stopped and her shoulders slumped down; her extreme exhaustion had caught up with her. She looked him in the eye, full of sadness and helplessness. "She is my fucking employee Jess! She works for me. And you work for her as her sex toy! Tell me you see how screwed up this is."

Jess slowly tried to take a step towards her, but just as soon as he did it she took stepped back. He sighed. "Yeah, I get it. I can see how fucked up it is," he told her softly.

She shook her head, her eyes downcast but her disappointment clear. "No, I really don't think you do," she paused and looked up at him. "You have no idea."

She walked to their room and slammed the door close.

Half an hour later, Rory left their bedroom and walked to Jess who was sitting on the couch.

"Tristan invited me to visit him," she said.

Jess looked up surprised, but as he saw the peaceful expression on her face he decided it was better to just go with whatever she wanted to do. "That's nice. When do you want to go?"

"Tonight."

"That's soon," he commented, but didn't say anything against the idea. "Okay, I'll just have to cancel my clients."

She looked at him in complete silence and he glanced at her suspiciously.

She took a deep breath and locked eyes with him. "I'm going alone," her tone was final.

"Oh," he stared at her, shocked. "I thought it would be like a break for us."

She shook her head, "No, I need a break from us."

He closed his eyes and sighed. "If that's what you need…" he conceded in a jaded tone. And then he had to ask something that had been plaguing him lately. "Rory, are you having second thoughts about us?" he whispered softly.

She looked down and shrugged. "I don't know." Then she looked up, took a deep breath and tried to conjure up as much courage as she could to continue. "If you want me to be honest, I wish I didn't need you so much, so I could just end this and stop being miserable. But apparently I can't. It's like the U2 song 'I can't live with or without you.'"

"To me it is just 'I can't live without you,'" he confessed.

She shook her head. "Yeah, well… actually I'm not so sure I believe that, but whatever," she said bitterly. "I'll go pack my bag. My bus leaves in two hours."


	28. The New Possibilities

**A/N: **Hey guys! Thank you so much for reviewing. You have no idea how much this means to me. I hope you like this chap and please, keep the reviews coming! The whole more real, faster update thing just might be true ; P

* * *

Rory stepped out of her bus and into the bus station carrying her luggage in one hand and her purse in the other, as she looked around, trying to find her best friend.

"Hello gorgeous," she heard a husky voice whisper on her right ear from behind. She turned around and found herself face to face with Tristan. The huge smile that appeared in her face went from ear to ear. Dropping her luggage and purse on the floor, she threw her arms around his neck, hugging close to her. As soon as the comfort of the embrace hit her she closed her eyes tightly and the tears finally started to roll down her face.

Tristan stroke her hair, humming in a soothing way as she kept sighing heavily.

"Shhh... it's okay. Everything is going to be okay," he whispered into her hair in his softest tone but she would only cry harder. "Let me take you home," he said, leading her to his car.

Once they arrived in his apartment he took her to the guest room and put her luggage by the door. "Do you need anything?" he asked as he watched her sit on the bed.

She shook her head.

"Do you want to talk about it?" he asked, running out of ideas of how to offer comfort.

"No," she said in a chocked voice. "I think I just need to sleep it over. But thanks."

"Okay, I'll let you go to sleep then," he said, walking back to the door.

"Tris, before you go... I just wanted to thank you. For inviting me here and for being my friend. I really need a friend right now and I don't know what I would do without you."

"Oh, Rory..." he sighed and took off his shoes before going to her and holding her to him. He lay her with him on the bed and stroke her hair for the rest of the night, taking care of her as she slept her problems away.

* * *

Jess entered the empty pizza place and went to sit on the counter, taking a salt and pepper shaker from one of the tables on his way. He looked down at the counter as he played aimlessly with them as he waited for Matt to finish stocking the liquor on the shelves behind the bar. When Matt was done he took two shot glasses and a bottle of José Cuervo and a lemon from behind the bar and sat on the counter facing Jess.

"If you came here to talk in the middle of the afternoon, then it must be serious," he said as explanation as he poured the tequila in the shot glasses and cut the lemon in four pieces.

"She left," he stated simply.

Matt raised his eyebrows in shock and almost spilled the tequila out of the glass, "What? When?"

"Last night," Jess sighed. "She heard from a client who happens to be her employee things about our time together. She didn't like it."

Matt scoffed and sat back on his stool, "Really? I never thought a woman wouldn't enjoy listening to what her boyfriend does in bed with another woman."

"I know it's fucked up, okay? Do you think I don't know that?" Jess almost yelled, angry at everything and everyone, but mostly at himself.

Matt decided to ignore his comment and go on with his questions, "So, you said she left? But how did she if it's her apartment?"

"She went to visit Tristan," he answered with distaste before drinking his tequila shot.

"Oh," Matt paused and smirked, "I bet you're loving it." He chuckled at his friend's chagrin face.

"Why couldn't she just go to her mother's or something?" Jess asked more than a little bothered.

Matt shrugged in response. "So, what are you going to do?"

"What can I do? Just wait for her."

"That is if she comes back."

Jess glared again at Matt, "Very comforting, really."

Matt pushed his shot of tequila towards Jess, offering him the drink, "You need it more than I do."

He ran his fingers though his hair, sighing and drinking the second shot. "What do you want me to do? It's not like I have any other option."

"Well, here is a crazy idea. Why don't you go after her? She needs to be wooed, to feel desired and specially, she needs to feel like she is the only one!"

"What if she doesn't want to see me? What if she tells me to go away?"

"Then you stay and you fight for her!" Matt answered raising his voice. "God, Jess! For a Don Juan you certainly aren't very good with the conquering and seducing!"

Jess shrugged. "I don't have much experience doing that. Never needed to chase a woman before, they always came willing and with no need of convincing."

"Yeah, well, if you want to make it work with Rory, then you'll have to actually put a lot of effort on it because it obviously won't be easy."

* * *

It had been four days since she arrived in Boston and she couldn't be happier, which in turn made her sad. It took her going to another city just to get away from Jess for her to get some kind of contentment again. But though the fact bothered her she had refused to dwell on it, simply accepting that she was finally feeling good after a long time and that was that.

Tristan did his best to distract her and keep her busy, which so far had been working very well. During the weekend he showed her around the city, took her sightseeing and to his favorite spots and the best book store in town. He also took her to the best coffee shop, which just happened to be a couple of blocks from his apartment.

When the weekend ended she half expected to go back to her usual depressed state that her relationship with Jess had gotten her, but instead she ended up following Tristan's suggestion of going back to the places she liked most on the weekend and running some small errands for Tristan. When she got back to his home it was already after 6:00 and he was waiting for her so they could go out for dinner. Every minute he didn't spend at work, he spent with her. And she couldn't be more thankful for that.

The following morning she woke up to the smell of coffee. As she had done the morning before, she stood up, went to the kitchen, poured herself a cup of coffee and got a pop-tart from the cabinet before walking to Tristan's room. She opened his door with no announcement and laid on his bed smiling while she watched him get ready for work.

"You look good, you know that?" she commented between sips.

Tristan smiled at her through the mirror he was using to look at his tie while he tried to make a knot, "Miss Gilmore, are you trying to seduce me? Because you really don't have to. We haven't slept together yet simply because you haven't shown any interest in doing so."

She laughed. "Good point. I'll think about it. So I take you're still single."

He sighed, "I guess I am." He groaned, frustrated with his tie, "I have to do it every day and I still get frustrated with it every morning. Why can't I just go to work wearing a tee?"

Rory put her cup on his nightstand, stood up and went to him, fixing his tie while he watched her closely.

"You know, this feels nice. It feels good to have you around all the time, to have a routine with you."

She smiled and kissed his cheek, "I know. I like it too." She looked down, "I wish we were in love. It'd be so much easier."

"Maybe this is a matter of trying to be happy and not to only survive being in love. You shouldn't suffer, you should feel overwhelmed and happy."

She shrugged, "I guess."

"Someone once told me that 'if it's true love then there is no suffering'. It's not supposed to be all about pain and feeling miserable. Relationships are hard enough. There are enough everyday problems without the 'Romeo and Juliet' tragedy. It should be something great and amazing."

Rory looked deep into Tristan's eyes and sighed. "I love you so damn much. But not like that. I wish it was different between us, but I know it's not. And though I wish I wasn't in love with him, I know I am. And until Jess and I figure out what's gonna happen, there isn't really much that I can do, unfortunately."

* * *

It was mid-afternoon when Rory heard her phone ring and saw "Jess" appear in the small screen. She bit her lip, sighed and looked again at his name, wondering if she should answer it or not. She closed her eyes trying to gather up enough courage before pressing the "talk" button and bringing the phone to her ear.

"Hey, Ror."

"Hi, Jess."

"I'm just calling because..." he paused, "I just wanted to know how you are doing," he finally said.

She sighed and shook her head, though he couldn't see it. "I'm good. I'm good."

"That's… good," he said unsure.

"What about you?"

"Same thing," he answered, but his voice betrayed him.

There was a long pause until Jess broke the silence.

"So, do you know when you'll come home?"

He could imagine her crossing and uncrossing her legs, shifting her weight from one leg to the other. She sounded nervous for some reason, "Not yet."

"I thought you were going to stay there only for the weekend, maybe an extra day but you've been there for almost a whole week. Won't you be in trouble at work?"

"I haven't had vacations in years; I can take about a month off if I want."

There was a long pause, "And do you?"

She sighed again, "I'm not sure yet. I'll stay here until I feel it's time to go back to New York."

"Can I do anything to make you come sooner?"

Her reply was firm, "No."

"Okay... So, how is Tristan?" he asked, trying to keep the conversation going, even if it wasn't his favorite subject at the moment.

He could hear the smile in her voice, "He is good. It's been fun to spend my vacation with him."

"I thought he was still working."

"He is. But we see each other before he leaves to work and have lunch together and the moment he is off the clock we do something fun. He has been showing me around. Boston is quite beautiful."

"I didn't think you were going to spend so much time together."

"I told you I was coming to visit Tristan."

"I thought it was more in the lines of 'I'll go to Boston and have lunch with him one day', not in the 'when I'm not watching TV in the hotel I'll be with him'."

She paused before continuing carefully, "Jess? I'm not staying in a hotel."

"What? Where are you?"

"When I told you I was coming to visit Tristan I meant that I was going to stay with him and spend time with him. He is my best friend, after all, and we haven't had the chance to spend so much time together since…"

"Since you were dating," Jess completed bitterly.

"Well, yeah, I guess so."

"Are you… are you sleeping with him?"

"Would it make a difference?"

"Yes," his tone is still soft.

"How? Are you going to tell me I should be faithful to you?"

"I can't tell you what to do, Rory. I just thought we were more than this."

"Well, it goes both ways. I thought you cared about me enough to swallow your pride and let me help you pay for school so you wouldn't sleep around for money."

"Come on, Rory. You know it's not like that."

"No, it's exactly like that. You don't need to sleep with all your clients. You say you don't have any option but you do, we both know you do. You wouldn't make half as much money but I could help you if you weren't just so damn stubborn and proud. Then we could be happy instead of having you asking me if I'm sleeping with my best friend."

She pressed the "end" button on her phone and hung up on him. She had had enough of the drama. She was happy in Boston and she wouldn't let Jess make her feel bad, which apparently he could do even when he was far away.

* * *

Rory heard the door being unlocked from where she sat on her bed and a minute later Tristan came in yelling a "hey" form the living room. She wiped her tears away furiously, trying to look as normal as she could before yelling back "in here".

A moment later Tristan walked into 'her' room with a smile that turned into a frown as soon as he noticed her red puffy eyes.

"Hey, what happened? Why are you so upset?"

"Try to guess," she replied sarcastically.

"Jess?" he asked unsure of how he could affect her so much from so far away.

"Yeah. He called me this afternoon. Wanted to know when I'd be back 'home'," she scoffs. "I don'ts even know where 'home' is anymore."

Tristan sighed and sat on the bed next to her, hugging her with one arm to show support.

"Come on, you shouldn't let him affect you this way."

She sighed, "I wish I could help it."

Tristan looked at her for a moment before standing up and offering her a hand, "Come on, stand up." She did as he said and he declared, "Get ready. We're going out."

She laughed as if he had told her a really funny joke, "Tristan, I'm too old to go clubbing."

"You're not too old, you're too serious," he corrected. "And you really need to take some weight off of your shoulders."

She tilted her head to the side, narrowing her eyebrows, "You know what? Maybe you're right. It's time I have some fun, too."

Tristan gave her a huge smile. "Okay. Dress up and meet me in the living room in fifteen, okay? I know just the place to go," he said before leaving her room and for once she was excited about having a night out without risking on bumping into one of Jess' clients.

Half an hour later Rory stepped into the club wearing a short red dress she had bought that week in a spur of the moment, a pair of "fuck me" high heels that made her four inches taller and holding Tristan by her side. They walked to a booth and sat down, watching the small crowd dancing.

"God, it's been so long since I've last been to a club! I forgot how I love dancing."

"Well, then I'm glad I brought you here. Do you want to have a drink first or just go to the dancing floor?"

"I think I'll go with the second option."

"Okay, let's go then."

"Tristan, you hate dancing."

"But you love it."

"So sit down and watch me do what I love," she replied with a smile and walked to the dancing floor before he could answer. Tristan smirked at her back, happy she seemed to be feeling better and watched as Rory closed her eyes and started to move sexily to the rhythm of the song, letting go of everything.

Soon enough a tall guy with brown hair and hazel eyes approached her, "Hey, I'm Brian. What is your name?"

"Rory," she answered barely over the music.

"Hi Rory. Would you give me the pleasure of dancing with you?"

When she heard his request first she was surprised, then she felt empowered. A handsome man was asking her to dance with him. He didn't know her at all. Didn't know how successful she was professionally or how non-existent her social life was. He just saw her and decided he wanted to get to know her better. Maybe it was all physical; maybe it wasn't. Either way it was great to feel wanted.

"Yes, I'd like that," she answered with a grin.

He grinned back and started dancing, matching her moves. She thought they looked pretty good together and when he moved behind her and put a hand on her waist and the other on her hip, moving in sync with her, she threw her head back and laughed, enjoying herself.

After dancing for half an hour he touched her shoulder and leaned in to whisper in her ear, "I'm sorry but I have to go. I have an early morning tomorrow."

She smiled at him, happy that he had approached her, even if it was just to dance for half an hour. Lost in her thought, she was surprised when he spoke up again.

"Can I have your number?" Brian asked in a husky voice.

"Uhm... yeah, sure... why not?" Rory said, trying to convince herself that it was no big deal, as he handed her his cell.

She took a picture of herself before saving her number in it before she handed him her phone and he did the same with her phone.

He gave her her phone with a grin, "I'll call you tomorrow but feel free to call me whenever you want, too."

She gave him a coy smile. "Let's see if you'll really call. Then, who knows?" she flirted with him, so unlike herself. It felt weird, but good somehow.

He walked her to the booth she had been sitting on before with a huge grin on his face and hugged her goodbye. When she sat down Tristan was smirking at her.

"Not even five minutes dancing and a guy hit on you. Told you you were hot!"

She bushed shyly and hit his chest playfully, "Shut up!"

He chuckled. "Okay, what about a beer now?"

She wrinkled her nose, "Nah. Can you get me a Screwdriver?"

"Huh. I think I like your wild side," he smiled at her before standing up and going to the bar to order for their drinks.

She looked around the club, completely distracted peoplewatching when a guy with black hair and green eyes stepped in front of her.

"I'm sorry to bother you but I have been watching you the whole night and I know that if didn't come here and talk to you I would kick myself in the ass tomorrow," he told her completely serious and she chuckled.

"Hi, I'm Rory."

"Sean. It's nice to meet you, Rory. You know, when I saw you dancing, so beautiful... I was two steps away from reaching you so I could ask you to dance when that guy approached you."

"Well, you're here now," she said, unsure of what to say.

"Yeah, we both are. So, you wanna dance?"

"Sorry, I'm kind of tired. But you're welcomed to sit down if you want," she offered him the booth to her left and he sat before she could have a second thought.

"You dance beautifully. Are you a dancer or something?" he asked, trying to start conversation.

She laughed and waved a hand, "No! Though it would be much more fun than what I do. I just have one of those boring office jobs."

"I know what you mean. I'm a lawyer. When I'm not in court I'm in the office. I love what I do, but I wish I could spend more time outdoors."

"I can imagine. Boston is so beautiful. I'm having a lot of fun sightseeing."

"You're not from here?"

She shook her head, "No, I'm from New York. I'm just visiting."

Tristan chose that moment to arrive with their drinks and looked at Rory questioningly.

"Oh, Tris this is Sean. Sean, this is my friend Tristan. He is the one who invited me to come to Boston."

"Hey," Sean greeted politely.

"Hi," Tristan sat on his stool handing Rory her drink before sitting down and really looking at the man next to him. "So Sean, have you ever been to New York?" Tristan asked.

"Yeah, a few times. Last time was about a year ago."

Tristan smiled at Rory and she gave him a look. After that the conversation flew easily. About an hour and a half, two more Screwdrivers and a lot of laughter later, Tristan finally looked at his watch with surprise.

"Wow, time really flies. I have to go home," Tristan said as he got his wallet out of his pocket. Rory also got her purse, getting ready to leave.

Sean quickly offered, "If you want I can give you a ride home later."

"No, thanks. I'd rather go now."

"Can I call you sometime then?"

"Yeah... I guess so," she answer again, reassuring herself that giving these two men her number was no big deal.

"I'll call you tomorrow. Maybe we can go out before you go back to New York...?" he asked as he handed her his phone.

She nodded unsure as she exchanged numbers with him just like she had with Brian.

He leaned in and hugged her warmly, "I'll see you soon, then."

She pulled away and smiled at him, then she turned to Tristan who rested a hand on the small of her back and guided her out of the club and to his car.

She was quiet all the way back to his apartment and Tristan let her be.

As soon as they arrived in his apartment Rory went to her room to take her heels off and put her purse on her bed. She went back to the living room to find Tristan, taking off his shirt while

"So, you had fun tonight?"

She nodded quietly, "I didn't know I could have that kind of reaction in men."

Tristan chuckled. "I told you. You just refused to listen."

"It was good, really good. Thank you Tristan, I don't know what I would do without you," she said hugging him.

"You're very welcomed. I love having you here," he said into the embrace before slowly pulling back. When their lips were just inches apart he took a deep look into her eyes and gasped at their intensity. Instead of pulling away he start to lean in again, softly pressing his lips to hers. The kiss was chaste, slow, careful, comfortable, almost innocent. Their trance kept going another kiss until she finally realized what was happening. She rested her hand on his bare chest and barely pushed him away, and looked up into his very blue eyes. "I can't," she whispered, and he nodded. She stepped back, turned around and walked to her room. Closing the door behind her, she rested her back against it, closed her eyes and sighed; it had been a long night.

* * *

After having Rory hung up on him, Jess sat on their bed staring at the wall in front of him, wondering how it could all go so wrong. But wondering wouldn't change anything and he started trying to look for a way to fix this thing he had with Rory.

He knew what she wanted him to do; she had already made it painful clear. The question was what would happen if he really quit. Would it really be enough? And what if it wasn't? What if he quit for her just to have her realize that she was still unhappy and didn't want him after all? Jess had always been terrified of changes and quitting the job that had help him pursue his dream of going to college was a huge change for him.

It took him a few hours of staring at a wall but he finally decided that being alone in New York wouldn't do anymore. He took his cell and went through the contact list until he found 'Lauren' and pressed 'talk'.

"Hey Lauren. I'm calling because I'll have to cancel," Jess said into his phone as he went through his closet and threw some clothes on the bed. "No, I'm not sure when I'll be available again, probably next week... Yeah, I know it's short notice but something came up and I'll be out of town for a few days."

He listened to her, rolling his eyes as he got a duffle bag and put the clothes on the bed in it.

"If you want there are always other guys available, I'm sure one of your friends can give you a number... Well, I'm sorry, but I just can't."

He closed the duffle bag, got his keys and left the apartment, locking it behind him. He listened the woman talking non-stop while he pressed the button to the elevator and waited for it.

"Okay, listen Lauren, as I told you I won't be available for the next few days. If you're still interested, call next week. Otherwise, have a nice life. Now I have to go. Bye, he said, hanging up on her and stepping into the elevator. It was time to follow Matt's advice and go after Rory before it was too late.


	29. Backbone

**Author's Note:**

Hey! Sorry it took me so long to update...

Anyways, I'd just like to apologize for the delay in my update, thank my wonderful faithful readers, specially the ones who have been sending reviews/PMs lately, and kindly ask you to review and tell me what you think about this chap. Thank you.

* * *

**Chap 28**

Rory woke up and opened her eyes to look at the clock on her nightstand. 11:34. She sighed. She felt exhausted and she had a headache, but still she had a smile on her face. The previous night had been amazing. She had actually gone out, danced, drunk, had fun, flirted and given her number to two handsome men. It had been a really amazing night. Even when she got back home and Tristan kissed her, although it had been a little weird to kiss her best friend - in spite of him being gorgeous - it was still good to feel wanted. And that's why she had a huge smile on her face even when she felt like a truck had ran over her.

While she replayed the previous night on her mind she heard a knock on the door. It felt like someone was actually knocking on her head, and for that reason alone she decided to get out of bed and answer it. Sliding her socks on the wood floor, she dragged herself from the room through the corridor to the living room, finally arriving at the door. However, when she opened it she almost wished she hadn't.

Standing there, with a hand on the doorway and the other holding a duffle bag, was Jess. He looked tired and worried but had a small winning smile on his face, as if just by seeing her it meant he had already got her back.

She frowned her forehead and crossed her arms in front of her chest, "What are you doing here?"

"I came for you," he answered in a matter-of-fact tone and for the first time feeling unsure of how welcomed he was going to be.

"How did you know where to find me?" still confused.

"Your mom has Tristan's address."

"And she just gave you it?" Rory asked, pissed off at Lorelai for interfering.

"Believe me, she made me work for it," he half-chuckled with a tired face, showing that indeed the woman had made him work for it and that he had made the effort for her. An awkward silence fell between them, somehow making them yet more distant even though they were just a few feet from each other.

"Can I come in?" he finally asked, almost hesitantly.

"Uhm.. yeah, I guess. Tristan is not home, he's at work, but I don't think he'll mind," she said as she stepped back.

He passed her, brushing his arm against hers, letting his head fall down and sighing. It was bad, but at least he was here now. He went to the grey couch and sat down, hoping she would sit next to him. She closed the door after him and turned around analyzing her options. It was such a small gesture but it could mean so much in their current situation. Finally, she chose the comfortable black leather armchair that was next to the couch. Close enough, but not quite the same thing.

"Did I wake you up?"

"Uhm... yeah," she answered rubbing her eyes.

He looked at her puzzled, "Sorry. It's almost noon, I thought you'd be up by now otherwise I'd have come later."

"It's fine."

"Long night?" he asked, curious.

"Uhm... yeah. So, you're here..." she changed the subject not very smoothly but efficiently.

"Yeah, I want you back home with me and since you're not there, I thought I should come here to be near you."

"Jess, I told you, you can't rush me back to New York," she told him firmly and he noticed how she said 'New York' instead of 'home'.

"I know. Still, I wanted to be close to you."

"What about your clients?"

"I called canceling," he said proudly, thinking he would win points with her.

"For how long?" she asked, tilting her head to the side and studying him carefully.

"It doesn't matter."

"Then there is no problem in answering the question."

"This week. But I can cancel the ones from next week too, if that's the case."

She shook her head and sighed, "I think you should go back to New York."

"But I just got here," he said, confused by her distant attitude.

"Yeah, but there is no place for you here. Why are you here in the first place?"

"To spend time with you?" he asked as if it was obvious.

"And do what? Everything I wish we had done when I was in New York? Now that I'm thinking of other options you decide to actually be a good boyfriend? Really?"

"It's not like that. I just missed you. And what do you mean 'other options'? I thought you came here to spend some time with your friend."

"I did. But it got me thinking... If I have to skip town to get away from you and feel better, then should we really be together?"

He stared at her in disbelief. "Have you met someone?"

"Jess... it's not about that."

"You have!" he concluded. "I thought you came here because you needed space, not because you were looking for someone new."

"I did come here to get some space and I'm not looking for anyone new. It's just... things change. I met some people here, not that I was looking for anyone, they just came to me."

"You slept with another guy?" he half asked, half stated.

"No. But-" she stopped not wanting to continue.

"But..." he insisted.

"But... I kind of kissed Tristan."

"You what? What do you mean "kind of kissed"? How do you "kind of kiss" someone?"

"It wasn't planned. We were arriving home and I had had a few drinks. We hugged... it wasn't even really a kiss, it was just a touch. I just thought you should know."

"Have you slept with him?"

"No."

"Really? You haven't slept with anyone while you've been here then?"

"No, I haven't slept with anyone but you since we've met. Now, can you say the same?"

"Are you trying to punish me?"

"Well, I'd certainly have reason to want to."

"Rory... I'm sorry for making you hurt, you know I am..."

She nodded but didn't say anything and he watched her carefully.

"These last few days have changed you," he commented, feeling the distance between them growing with every word they said.

She nodded again with a small, almost sad smile. "This amazing thing happened. I found out I can have a life without you. That I might actually even be happy without you," she said, but the emotions on her face didn't show the happiness she should be feeling.

"So I was right back then when I said you'd changed your mind; you found something better, someone better?"

She shook her head, "No, it's not about that. It's not about finding someone better; it's about not being miserable. I was so unhappy before I met you and then we got together and I felt something... it just blew me away. And when you broke your leg... it was like honeymoon," she then stopped and sighed at the weight of her next words. "But then you went back to work and it made me feel even more miserable than before. And yet I was so in love with you that I thought I couldn't possibly be happy without you, that it was better to be miserable with you than to be without you. But now... now that I spent this time away, I actually think that I could be okay. Not right away. But that I could heal and even be happy eventually. But mainly, I'd stop hurting."

"Rory..."

"No, you asked, so now you listen. I'm not looking for someone new and I'm not ending things right now. I love you and I wish we could fix things and just be together. But I'm tired of hurting and if being away from you will make me feel better, than that's what I'm gonna do."

He blinked, surprised to see her so determined and strong. The silence that fell between them was heavy and though it wasn't awkward, it wasn't comfortable either. A few minutes passed before her cell phone rang and vibrated on the table between them, calling their attention. Sean's picture lightened up with his name at the bottom and Rory bit her lip, uncomfortable with the situation. Jess immediately knew what was happening from her reaction and suddenly felt at a loss. She held her breath, not knowing what to do and he provoked her even though he knew he shouldn't.

"Aren't you going to answer it?" he raised an eyebrow a little, like a challenge.

She frowned at him, getting pissed off at his high-handed attitude and with a daring look on her face she took the phone and pressed 'talk' before bringing it to her ear, while watching his face.

"Hey, Sean, how are you?... I'm good... Yeah, it was fun. I had a great time..." she almost giggled like a school girl. "I'm not sure when I'm going back yet..." she answered slowly after a minute, almost hesitantly. "Tonight?... What did you have in mind?... Uhm... Sounds good...," she said as she distractedly looked down, deep in thought. "I'll just meet you there... No, no, it's okay, I can just meet you there... No, I-..." she sighed, "Okay, if you insist. I'll send you a message with my address... Okay, I'll see you then. Bye."

She hung up and looked up to see a shocked Jess in front of her.

"Did you just agree to go on a date with some guy?" he asked, put off.

She snorted. "Are you really berating me? From what I remember you set up countless 'dates' with your clients in front of me." She stood up, ready to go back to her room.

"They were clients!" his tone showed his belief that it made it a completely different situation and that she was being illogical at the very least.

She snorted and rolled her eyes, annoyed, "Well, would it make you feel better if I charged for going out with him?" she asked before walking into her room and slamming the door behind her.

And that shut him up better than any slap ever could.

* * *

Rory spent most of the day locked in her room, hiding from Jess. She just left her room to eat and take a shower, barely spending any time in his company. She was still confused by his visit and unsure of how to act. around him He had come all the way to Boston to see her, but what did it really change. If she went back to New York with him he would go back to his job and she would go back to feeling miserable and what would have been the point to get away in the first place then? At the same time she didn't know what to do about Sean and Brian now that Jess had been added to the equation.

After thinking about it for a long time, she decided to continue to spend her time in Boston as if Jess wasn't there, after all he shouldn't be in the first place. She would go out with Sean and have fun and if Brian called her she would give him a fair chance, just like she had done wish Sean.

Jess was pouring himself some water when he heard someone knocking on the door. He closed the fridge and went to answer it. What he found was a tall, built guy with brown hair and blue eyes, wearing jeans and a dark polo shirt who was holding a bouquet of flowers on one hand.

He looked at Jess, taken aback. "I'm sorry, I think I got the wrong apartment."

Jess glared at him, "You are Sean ?"

The other guy nodded slowly, "Yeah."

Jess sighed and turned around leaving the door open, "Rory, your date is here."

They both could her voice from another room shouting back, "Okay, I'm going." A moment later she walked into the living room, getting appreciative looks from both men. She was wearing in a simple short black dress and a pair of black high heels, but they had style and they looked great on her.

She smiled at Sean when she noticed the flowers he was carrying and he gave it to her.

"They are beautiful. Thank you," she said, bringing the flowers near her face.

He smiled, "They looked fragile and yet strong. They are breathtakingly beautiful and they smell so good. They reminded me of you."

She coyly blushed and looked down while Jess rolled his eyes, annoyed.

Suddenly, Jess broke the silence by clearing his throat, "Aren't you going to introduce us, Rory?"

She gave him a pointed look but said, "Sean this is Jess. Jess this is Sean."

Jess held his hand to Sean and added, "Hi, I'm Rory's boyfriend."

Sean shook his hand before turning back to Rory, "Is he really your boyfriend?"

Rory glared at Jess who didn't look phased at all, "Kind of."

Sean's eyes widened and he continued, "So... you're in an open relationship? And you don't mind that I'm going out with your girlfriend?"

Rory answered "Kind of," to the first part of the question while Jess snorted and said, "Oh, I do mind."

Sean looked even more confused and Rory felt compelled to give him some kind of explanation. "He has slept with other women, I have never slept with anyone but him since we've started dating. We've been on a break for a little over a week, that's why I came to Boston," she paused and studied him. "Do you have a problem with any of it? I mean, do you still want to go out with me?"

"I'd be crazy not to go out with you. The situation is a bit weird but I'd still love to go out with you," he told her honestly, with a huge smile on his face.

She smiled coyly at him and sat the flowers on the coffee table, grabbing her purse and leaving with Sean, not even noticing Jess' distress over everything.

* * *

It was late at night when she opened the door and stepped inside the dark apartment.

"Did you sleep with him?" she heard Jess ask and looked up surprised. In the darkness she could see his silhouette by the window but his face was shadowed.

"No," she answered honestly.

"Are you going to?"

"I don't know. Maybe."

"Do you want to?"

"I'm not sure. I'm not planing on it but I won't make any promises that I may break either."

"Would it make any difference if I asked you not to?"

This time she was silent for a long time, watching him and pondering if it would. Finally, she said, "No."

He stared at her shocked for a minute before slowly nodding.

"You don't care that it will hurt me?"

"Have you ever cared about how much it hurt me? Seriously?" she countered, walking into the apartment more confidently.

"Yes," he told her, but she didn't believe he understood how much he had really screwed up.

"Really? How many women did you sleep with since I came to Boston?" she asked him, curious.

"Rory..."

"No, I'm serious. I want to know."

"Two," he admitted in a defeated voice.

She nodded as if it proved her point. "I don't think you see the problem."

"I know the problem, but what do you want me to do? Stop working?" he said, knowing that was what she had expected of him since the beginning.

She was silent for a long minute, staring at the floor, before raising her head and saying with a disturbing serene tone, "That's the thing. I'm not sure if I want that anymore. I don't know if I want anything at all from you."

His eyes widened, finally realizing that she was seriously considering leaving him. "You don't mean that," he said, in denial.

"I do. I can't keep going like this forever." She sighed heavily as if she was letting go of the weight of the world that rested on her shoulders, "I'm tired, Jess. I'm so tired."

"Is this an ultimatum?"

"No, it really isn't. You can go back to New York now and fuck a woman tonight or you can stay here, either way it won't change my plans for today. I'm not asking anything from you anymore. I tried, God knows I tried. I tried everything... to be understanding, not to care, to pretend it wasn't happening... but there is only so much I can take. And I reached my limit."

"I knew sooner or later you'd realize you wanted something better and leave. I told you this was going to happen," he chuckled mockingly. "And you said it wouldn't," his tone bordered on accusatory.

"Oh, no. No fucking way you are going to make me the bad guy. I loved you, I truly did. I still do. There was nothing better than you, I wanted it all with you. I wanted a family, Jess. I hoped we would have it all together but you killed all the hope I had in us and I can't wait forever." She paused and took a deep breath before continuing, "I'm not blaming all this on you. It's like the saying, 'fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me.' The shame has been on me for a long time now, but it's time to stop."

"I love you," he said desperately. "You know I do."

She nodded quietly in agreement, "And I, you. But we both know better. We both know that sometimes love isn't enough. If my love for you hurts me this much, then something is very wrong in our relationship." She saw he was ready to defend himself, so she continued, "I knew from the start that you wouldn't stop sleeping with other women, I'm not saying you lied to me or that I was naive or didn't know what I was getting myself into. But as I said, I had hope; I don't have it anymore."

He looked out of the window, not saying a word. He didn't know what he could possibly say. The silence stretch for long minutes until she cleared her throat and decided to break. "Look, I should go to bed..." she said, signaling she was going to her room.

He turned to face her, suddenly realizing he was losing her and that tonight she may very well got to know a guy who could steal her away from him. He just didn't know what to say. "What do I do? Should I stay? Should I go back?"

She shrugged and shook her head, "I'm not going to tell you what to do. It's time you decide it for yourself and accept the consequences."

He looked down and nodded, and she could see he was pondering and trying to figure out what was the 'right' thing to do. She sighed and walked to her room, when she was about to close the door she heard his voice, quiet and unsure, "Can I stay here?"

She looked at the uncertainty and vulnerability in his eyes and could only give one answer, "Yeah, you can."

He suddenly looked relieved and nodded at her, "Okay. I'll stay then."

"Okay. Tristan keeps blankets and pillows in the drawer under the couch. I think you'll find everything you need there."

He nodded, "Thanks."

She nodded back and closed the bedroom door, closing her eyes and sighing. Just when she thought things were slowing down he came and shook everything up again. He may not have realized what he had done, but he had just taken the first step in the right direction.

* * *

**A/N:** Please review!


	30. The Hell Me Make for Ouselves

**Author's Note:**

It was such an amazing thing to have the response that I had from this story. I'm extremely grateful to everyone who has reviewed this story. Honestly, the reviews are what keep me going.

I hate to write long A/Ns but there are some things that I'd like to clear up. First, I have to thank takalotti for pointing out a mistake about Tristan's whereabouts that I hope I was able to correct in this chap. Second, I'd like to say that I needed some inspiration to write so I went back to my list of favorites and I was amazed by some of the authors I used to read. So I'd like recommend my whole list of favorites, specially the 'retired' authors Angeleyez and lucia marin. And finally, I know it's surprising that I posted two chaps in a month after a year of absence. I wanted to explain that until recently I had to take some medicine that interfered with my creativity and though I longed to write I just couldn't. Hopefully that is in the past now.

Thank you again for reading and reviewing and please, keep reviewing. =)

* * *

**Chap 30**

Rory was quietly making coffee in the kitchen the next morning, trying not to wake up Jess, who was sleeping in the couch, when she heard the door being unlocked. She leaned on the kitchen threshold with an amused smirk as she watched Tristan enter the apartment. He didn't notice her presence until she playfully asked him, "So, this is what they call the 'walk of shame', huh?"

He turned around quickly, startled, "Oh, God! You scared me half to death!"

"Shhh..." she motioned to the living room. "Jess is sleeping."

Tristan frowned and walked to the living room, and sure enough Jess was sleeping on his couch. She signed for him to follow her to the kitchen and poured them two cups of coffee. "So, you got lucky last night?"

Tristan scratched the back of his head, "I had a late dinner."

She scoffed, "Yeah, right. If that's what you're calling it nowadays." She paused before continuing, "We both know nothing will ever happen between us, but I still want to meet her to see if she is good enough for you."

He smiled, "Sure. If it gets serious you'll be the first to meet her."

Rory nodded satisfied.

Tristan tilted his head to the side and gave her a look, "I think there are more important things going on than me having a late dinner. What is Jess doing here?"

"If you had come home yesterday you'd know he showed up yesterday morning with a duffle bag saying he missed me."

"Huh, that's pretty romantic." As soon he finished the sentence she threw him a look and he raised his hands in a sign of surrender. "I mean, no, of course it's not romantic. Not at all."

She chuckled at his reaction and watched him sip his coffee. "He is trying to make up for too much. It's just impossible but he doesn't get it."

"He is trying," Tristan shrugged.

"He slept with two women since I came to Boston."

"Okay, so he may not be the smartest guy..."

"He just doesn't get it, Tristan. And honestly, I'm not sure I care anymore," she paused. "I went on a date with Sean last night."

Tristan chocked on his coffee, "What? Does Jess know?"

"He is the one who answered the door for Sean."

Tristan shook his head, "This is so screwed up!"

"Well, Sean called me and Jess tried to make me feel bad for talking to him, like I was doing something wrong. And Sean was so nice. He was a gentleman on the date. What did he expect me to do?

"Not go out with a guy in front of him?"

She crossed her arms, angrily. "Do you have any idea how many times I had to watch him schedule dates with his clients? Do you have any idea how it feels like to watch him walk out the door to go fuck another woman, or how it feels to have him come back to me smelling of some sickening sweet perfume that I would never wear?"

He put down his coffee on the sink and pulled her hand softly until he was hugging her, "I know you are in an impossible situation and I wouldn't dream of criticizing the way you deal with it. I just worry. I'm not sure if you're trying to move on or hurt him, and if you're not hurting yourself too much in the process."

Rory considered what Tristan said for a moment and finished her coffee, "Maybe I do want to hurt him but I also want to experiment a little. For the first time in my life I'm not feeling like the ugly duckling. I'm feeling desired and I think I have the right to explore it after everything he put me through."

"Of course you have, Ror. I'm just asking you to be careful."

"I will be. Thanks, Tristan. For everything you've done for me," she kissed his cheek, put her mug in the sink and walked back to her room, stealing a glance at Jess' sleeping form.

* * *

Jess slept in, as he always did, and only woke up around eleven. He knocked at Rory's door, feeling unsettled by the gap there was between them that wasn't there just a week ago.

"Come in," she said just loud enough for him to hear.

He sneaked his head into her room, "Can we talk?"

She shrugged from her spot in the bed and put her book down, Sure."

He walked to her bed sitting in front of her. He scratched the back of his head and shifted his weight from one side to the other on the bed. "I'm not sure of what to say. I just want to fix things, but I don't know how."

"I don't think you can. There's been too much damage."

"So, that's it?" he asked, not accepting her answer.

She shrugged again, "I don't know. All I know is that Sean called while you were sleeping. We're going out again tonight.

"I don't like it," was his immediate answer.

"I know. I'm still going."

He nodded quietly and was silent for a minute. "Do you mind if I read with you?"

She shook her head with a small smile and he rushed to the living room to grab his copy of "Lady Windermere's Fan", afraid she would change her mind. When he came back he laid down next to her and started to read his book while she read "The Real Thing." Five minutes later he was absently stroking her hair with one hand while holding his book with the other, never seeing the torn expression on her face.

* * *

When night fell Rory took a long bath and put on a tight dress that showed off all her curves, a pair of high heels that made her legs look even longer, a little make up and some perfume. He watched helpless as she got ready, trying to look as beautiful as she could for another ma, and the jealousy inside him was all consuming. When she was applying some lip gloss in front of the mirror the doorbell rang and they stared at each other through the mirror.

"I can't do this tonight," he told her and she knew he was referring to answering the door and being nice to Sean.

She nodded her head in understanding and shouted, "Just give me a minute and I'll be ready."

She turned around, not sure about what to say and he looked her up and down in awe, "You're absolutely beautiful."

She smiled shyly, "Thanks."

She headed to the door but he lightly grabbed her hand making her stop, "I'll be here waiting for you when you come back," he told her, trying to convey so much more.

Her heart beat fast and hard against her chest but she didn't say anything. It wouldn't be fair to any of them if she made promises she didn't know if she would keep. She wanted to reassure him somehow but she just couldn't. She had promised herself she would give a fair chance to Sean and explore their tentative relationship. And though it shook her to see Jess so vulnerable for the first time, she couldn't just give in. She needed to go though with it, she owned it to herself.

She bit her lower lip, looked at his hand that was still holding hers and gently pulled away from him. She looked down and quietly left the apartment.

Her lack of response just about broke his heart.

* * *

When Tristan arrived home in the middle of the night, probably from a 'late dinner', he found Jess sitting on a kitchen stool, nursing a beer and staring at the kitchen counter.

He narrowed his, walking closer to him, "Hey, man."

"Hey," Jess' voice was defeated.

"You okay? Where is Rory?" he asked, confused about Jess' behavior.

"She is screwing some guy at this moment. Does that answer if I'm okay?" Jess spat angrily.

Tristan frowned and sat on the stool next to him, "Hey, she is just on a date and you don't know that."

"It's 4:00 and I know Rory; if she hasn't come back by now she won't come back tonight."

Tristan didn't know what to say mainly because he agreed with Jess, but he didn't want to confirm the other man's fears. So he offered what little comfort he could, "Do you want another beer?"

Jess gave him a bitter smile, "Yeah, thanks."

"Do you want to talk about it?"

"My girlfriend is fucking another guy right now while I drink beer with her ex-boyfriend. What is there to talk about?"

Tristan shrugged, "Just offering."

Jess sighed and let his head fall, rolling it from one side to the other. "Sorry, it's just... I just don't know what to do. I thought I knew how this felt like, I told her that so many times, that I understood. But I didn't. I had no idea. Now, I do."

"Are you going to wait for her here?" Tristan asked looking at his watch.

Jess simply shrugged as if to say 'yes'.

The other man carefully suggested, "You know, maybe it's not such a good idea to face her when she arrives.

"And where should I go hide? In her room?"

Tristan was silent for a moment, then shook his head. "Sleep in my room. I have a lady friend who wouldn't mind some company tonight and honestly I don't want to be around when you face each other."

Jess sighed, relieved "Thanks, man. I think we're both dreading facing each other now. Maybe we need this time apart, even if it's only one night, to try to think clearer."

"No problem. I can't imagine how you both feel but I'm sure it's not easy."

Jess chuckled, "That's the understatement of the century."

Tristan shrugged, "I'll just go get some clothes and stuff and I'm out of here."

Jess nodded and ten minutes later Tristan was gone. As soon as he left Jess went to his room, hiding from Rory. He knew it was cowardly and that she had never hidden from him when they were in the opposite end of this situation, but he just couldn't deal with it.

* * *

He woke up from a restless dream and immediately remembered the reason behind it. He tried to wrap his mind around what was happening but he just couldn't. Sighing, he sat up in bed and started to think about the situation, getting to the conclusion that there weren't many options. He could break it off, go back to New York and never see her again; he could try to have an 'open relationship', in which he kept working and she could date and sleep with whomever she wanted; or, he could fight for her, accepting the consequences. But more important, he needed to know if she still felt about him the same way she did before coming to Boston or ig the night before had irrevocably changed it. Mustering up all the courage he could, he walked to her room and softly knocked on the door.

"Come in,"he heard her say from inside the room. He slowly opened the door, not sure of what he would find. When he saw her lying on the bed, on her side with a sad, almost tearful expression on her face, he knew his decision had already been made before he even noticed it.

He quietly walked to the bed, laying on his side next to her, their faces only inches apart. She looked down at his hand that was flat against the mattress just bellow his pillow. He gently pushed a strand of her hair behind her ear before resting it below the pillow again.

Her eyes stung with tears unshed and though she didn't want to, she knew she had to say the words out loud even if it was in a whisper, "I slept with him."

She could see the sadness in his eyes, but he wasn't angry. He just nodded, "I know."

"I'm sorry," she said. And she was. She wasn't sure if she regretted it, but sleeping with someone she didn't love and hurting Jess in the process wasn't her ending game. She didn't intentionally want to hurt him but she thought she owned herself to find out if she could have the same connection that she had with Jess with someone else.

"Was it good?" he asked in an even voice.

"Jess..." she said, pleading, thinking he was trying to punish her. He wasn't.

"Really, I want to know,"he said in a calm voice that convinced her he simply wanted all the cards on the table and no lies, half truths or unsaid things between them.

She felt ashamed and guilty, but replied anyway, "Yes."

He closed his eyes and swallowed, then nodded. "Are you in love with him?" he asked, afraid of her answer.

"No," she told him firmly, not hesitating for a second.

He nodded relieved. "Are you going out with him again?"

She shook her head, "No."

"Do you want to sleep with someone else in specific?"

She simply shook her head, feeling the weight of his question.

"Do you still love me?"

She tilted her head to the side, narrowing her eyes, "Does it matter?"

"I think so."

"Do you love me? Now?" She made the first question since they started talking.

He didn't say a word for a long time, reaching out with a hand to stroke her cheek, run his fingers through her hair, trace her lip with his thumb. "Yes, just like yesterday and last week and last month."

She sighed and she can't help but let a couple of tears scape before kissing his thumb. "Yes."

He leaned over and touched her forehead with his, both finding a strange comfort in it.

She pulled away and looked down, her voice broken. "What now? I slept with someone else."

He smiled sadly, "I know." He paused for a moment and looked down before going back to stroke her hair, "It's okay."

She stared into his eyes, seeing the lie in them and shook her head, "It's not."

He didn't try to contradict her, he just kept stroking her hair. "It is going to be okay," he tried again.

"You don't know that," she accused, desperate.

His only reaction was to shrug calmly, staring deeply into her eyes, "But I believe it."

And finally, staring back into his eyes, she calmed down. She believed him.

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**A/N:** Please, review!


	31. Author's Note Help

Hey guys!

I'm sorry this is not a chapter but I really needed to ask something from my readers.

I need your help to understand why people like this story, so I'm asking everyone who reads it to send me a PM or a review letting me know why you enjoy reading it… if it's because the female/male roles are kind of reversed or because of their relationship is a little sick…

It's really important for me to know that.

I really appreciate you guys taking the time.

~ Bru


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